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QUOTE NUMBER : QUOTE
- 4334 : Don't you just hate Perry's wife?
- 4340 : #1 - Are you somebody's father? #2 - Me, no, I'm a drunk.
- 6105 : Perhaps you'de like me to wash your dick for you. You little shit.
- 6457 : I'll alert the media.
- 6567 : 1. I don't drink because DRINKING EFFECTS your decision making. 2. You maybe right, I CAN'T DECIDE!! heh, Where's the rest of this moose? 1. WHY DON'T YOU FORGET THE MOOSE FOR A MOMENT!!! 2. Right.
- 8615 : Normally, someone would have to go to a bowling alley to meet someone of your stature.
- 8690 : Where is the rest of this moose?
- 14096 : A)Nobody in my family ever drinks. B)That's great!! You probably never run out of ice your whole life!
- 14097 : A)Bathing is a lonely business . B) Except for fish. A)I'm sorry, did you say, except for fish? B)Yes, fish all bathe together, although they do tend to eat one another. I often think fish must get awfully tired of seafood, what are your thougts, Hobson?
- 15379 : A) Offer to take my coat B) You don't have a coat A) Well offer to take my tie
- 15614 : A) How rich are you? B) Well, all I know is, I wish I had a dime for every dime I have
- 15705 : 1 (Reading the paper) I think I'll take a bath. 2 (sacastically calm) I'l alert the press.
- 15706 : 1 (Reading the paper) I think I'll take a bath. 2 (sacastically calm) I'll alert the press.
- 15746 : A) Look at that, she just stole that tie. It's a perfect crime, girls don't wear ties. Although some do, it's not a perfect crime, but it's a GOOD crime B) Yes, if she murdered the ties it would be an even better crime. Why are we so interested in this?
- 15748 : A) Hi. B) Yes, you obviously have a wonderful economy with words, Gloria. I look forward to your next syllable with great eagerness
- 15778 : A) What'd ya have in mind? B) Uh, V.D., I'm really into penicilin hahahaha....actually what I had in mind was spending the evening with a stranger who loves me. A) Gonna cost you a hundred dollars B) Oh really, what time do you get off work hahahahaha....I'm kidding, I'm kidding. Let's make it two hundred, but I will ask you to simonize my car hahahahahahaha. Bitterman, give her....give her friend a hundred dollars, she came in second
- 15790 : A) I stopped seeing Linda B) I don't know why. A little tart like that could save you a fortune in prostitutes
- 15967 : I'm talking small..they recently had the whole country carpeted. Rhode Island could kick the crap out of it in a war, this is not a big place
- 16203 : Tell him Inspecto Flanagan from Homicide is here, that should get him here in a hurry
- 17715 : I often think fish must get awfully tired of seafood
- 17806 : A) You'd make a fine adult someday B) That's easy for you to say, you haven't got 50 pairs of short pants hanging in your closet
- 17845 : Are you opposed to naming a child Vladimir..even a girl?
- 17850 : A) Aww the service here is terrible! B) We just ordered! A) That's always their excuse! (Whistling) Engine room, where the HELL'S my drink?
- 17891 : Would the more attractive of you please step forward? (laughs hysterically) No actually you're both very attractive, would the one who thinks I'm attractive please step forward? Quickly as possible, time is money!
- 18215 : A) Would you like anything else? B) Do you have todays' Pravda? I like to keep up on Russia
- 18230 : If you and your undershirt were to take two paces back, I could enter this dwelling
- 18542 : Gimme three dozen of these sweaters, all....green..I don't wear sweaters
- 18795 : A) Alcohol affects your decision making B) You may be right, I can't decide
- 18887 : A) Ah, Mr. Bach, how good to see you! B) Oh if only someone I knew felt that way!
- 18892 : A) Oh please, don't die anymore, it's quite boring B) I told you I've only got a cold, now go and get engaged
- 18968 : Aren't waiters wonderful? You ask them for things and they bring them, same principle as Santa Claus
- 19077 : Grab my drink, after all we're going to a bar!
- 19153 : A) How does it feel to have all that money? B) Feels pretty good A) It was a dumb question
- 19221 : A) I take it this bum will be calling you? B) Dad, he's a millionaire. A) You have my permission to marry him
- 19309 : Where is the rest of this moose?
- 19600 : A) Would you like to wait in the library? B) Yes I would, the bathroom is out of the question!
- 19918 : A) So what do you do for a living? B) Well, I race cars, I play tennis, I fondle women, BUT, I have weekends off, and I am my own boss hahahahahaha!
- 21031 : A) How about a pitcher of Martinis? B) No thank you. A) Oh God, Hobson, I'm not going to face my father sober, if you don't bring them I'll have someone else do it!
- 21315 : He wants me to marry Susan. I can't tell you her last name because that would be indiscreet..Johnson.
- 21512 : "What should I wear?" "Steal something casual"
- 21688 : Arthur:" Where is my hat?!" Prostitute:"On the floor" Arthur:"OH! I HATE IT WHEN THAT HAPPENS!!"
- 21735 : "Don't you wish you were me?... I know I do"
- 22961 : What if i make her....cranky? I guess for cranky you probably just break my kneecaps huh?
- 23283 : I fell out of the car, isn't that the funniest thing ever?!
- 23654 : 1. Take my hand 2. But that would leave you with one!
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