QUOTE NUMBER : QUOTE
- 9926 : I RULE!!
- 9927 : You are so busted!
- 10109 : My life is flashing before my eyes, and these guys havn't even broke a sweat.
- 10668 : No its great, I mean, if a guy wants to Fuck me just by looking at me, it means that i have a real shot at being a model.
- 11187 : Whoop's where'd my job go?
- 11539 : You want me to kill him for you? - Yeah, would ya?
- 12316 : I Rule!
- 12320 : #1: You don't want to be unemployed. #2 Oh, ok. Let's all sell our souls to Satan because it's more convenient that way.
- 12363 : Look at me, jerking off in the shower. This is the high point of my day. It's all downhill from here.
- 12364 : Jane no home.
- 12859 : We have a very healthy relationship.
- 13080 : yeah! I was shelling the peanut, choking the bishop!
- 13236 : Since you've made it perfectly clear just how unnecessary you consider me to be!
- 13245 : I had always heard your entire life flashes in front of your eyes the second before you die. First of all, that second isn't a second at all, it streches on forever, like an ocean of time....
- 13393 : ...my job consists of basically masking my contempt for the assholes in charge, and, at least once a day, retiring to the men's room so I can jerk off while I fantasize about a life that doesn't so closely resemble hell.
- 13526 : I didn't lose my job... it's not like, "whoops, where'd my job go?!"
- 14158 : It was one of those days when it's a minute away from snowing and there's this electricity in the air, you can almost hear it, right? And this bag was like, dancing with me. Like a little kid begging me to play with it. For fifteen minutes. And that's the day I knew there was this entire life behind things, and... this incredibly benevolent force, that wanted me to know there was no reason to be afraid, ever. Video's a poor excuse. But it helps me remember... and I need to remember... Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world I feel like I can't take it, like my heart's going to cave in.
- 14159 : Never underestimate the power of denial.
- 14160 : You probably don't have any idea what I'm talking about. But don't worry. You will someday.
- 14302 : I am GOING to sell this house today.
- 14804 : Welcome to America's weirdest home videos.
- 16179 : A. Man. You are one twisted fuck. B. Nope. I'm just an ordinary guy with nothing to lose
- 17305 : Honey, i watched you very closely and you didn't screw up once!!
- 17330 : You know if you're not careful you'll turn out to be a bitch just like your mother.
- 17502 : 1. Oh, you think you're the only one, who is SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED?!! 2. I'm not? well, come on baby!! I'M READY!!! 1. Don't Lester, because I will divorce you so fast, it will make your head spin!! 2. ON WHAT GROUNDS!!! I don't drink, I don't fuck other woman, and I have never yelled or hit you in any way, but I did support you when you got your license, so that somehow entitles me to what's HALF MINE!!!
- 17568 : I would like to thank you, LESTER!!! for making me, Carolyn, THE SOUL BREAD WINNER NOW!!!
- 17809 : There's nothing worse than being ordinary
- 17810 : Never underestimate the power of denial
- 17811 : Never under estimate the power of denial
- 17812 : I'll be dead in a year....In a way, I'm dead already.
- 17861 : I need a father who's a role model, not some horny geek boy who's going to spray his shorts whenever I bring a girlfriend from school.
- 17862 : My Job consist of basically masking my contempt for the assholes in charge and atleast once a day retiring to the men's room so I can jerk-off, while I fantasize about a life that doesn't so closely resembles hell.
- 17871 : Lose it?! I didn't lose it! It's not like, "Whoops! Where did my job go?" I quit! Someone pass the asparagus.
- 17953 : That's my wife Carolyn. See the way the handle on those pruning shears matches her gardening clogs?
That's not an accident
- 17954 : That's our next-door neighbor Jim...
And that's his lover...Jim.
- 17955 : I've lost something very important. I'm not exactly sure what it is, but I know I didn't always fell this...
- 17956 : A.Les, Gotta minute? B.For you, Brad? I've got five.
- 18047 : My name is Lester Burnham. This is my neighborhood. This is my street. This is my life. I am 42 years old. In less than a year I will be dead. Of course I don't know that yet. And in a way I am dead already.
- 18055 : Don't give up on me dad
- 18105 : Aw-alright, so shoot me! So I was whacking off! That's right I was chocking the bishop! Chaffing the carrot! You know saying 'Hi.' to my monster!
- 18181 : I dunno. Probably out fucking that dorky prince of real estate asshole. And you know what? I don't care.
- 18204 : Will some one please pass me the fuckin asparagus?
- 18205 : DON'T interrupt me, honey
- 18298 : That was exactly what I needed. The royal treatment, so to speak.
- 18344 : Brad! For 14 years I've been a whore for the advertising industry. The only way I can save myself now is if I start firebombing.
- 18377 : I guess I could be pretty pissed off about what happened to me...
but it's hard to stay mad when there's so much beauty in the world. SOmetimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much, and my heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst...
And then I remember to relax and stop trying to hold on to it,
and then it flows through me like rain,
and I can't feel anything but gratitude for every single moment of my stupid little life...
- 18649 : I had always heard your entire life flashes in front of your eyes the second before you die. First of all, that second isn't a second at all, it streches on forever, like an ocean of time
- 18651 : Yeah, Well at least I'm not Ugly, Yes you are, and you're boring and you're totally ordinary and you know it.
- 18677 : It's a great thing when you realize you still have the ability to surprise yourself.
- 19188 : I think you just became my personal hero.
- 19373 : You like gettin' nailed by the King?!?!
- 19488 : That just shows how much you know about me Mr. Smarty Man
- 19881 : Oh yes! I love it! Fuck me your Majesty!
- 19920 : No, well, alright! Let's all sell our souls to Satan because it's more convenient that way.
- 20023 : What a lame-o.
- 20062 : Both my wife and daughter think I am this gigantic loser and they are right. I have lost something.
- 20093 : Forgive me, sir, for speaking so bluntly, but those fags make me feel like puking my fucken guts out!
- 20310 : it's ok, i wouldnt remember me either
- 20544 : I'm not obsessive, I'm just curious.
- 20545 : I'm as anatomically impaired as a ken doll.
- 21039 : 1. Oh, you think you're the only one, who is SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED?!! 2. I'm not? well, come on baby!! I'M READY!!! 1. Don't Lester, because I will divorce you so fast, it will make your head spin!! 2. ON WHAT GROUNDS!!! I don't drink, I don't fuck other woman, and I have never yelled or hit you in any way, but I did support you when you got your license, so that somehow entitles me to half of whats yours!!!
- 21116 : I'm not obsessing...I'm just currious
- 21545 : 1) why do you even care? 2) because i'm your friend! 3) She's not your friend. She's someone you use to make you feel good about yourself.
- 21575 : A) Honey don't be weird. B) Ok honey, i won't be weird, i'll be whatever you want me to be.
- 21586 : 1) Honey, don't be weird. 2) Ok honey, i won't be weird, I'll be whatever you want me to be.
- 21587 : 1) Honey, don't be weird. 2) Ok honey, i won't be weird, I'll be whatever you want me to be.
- 21588 : 1) Honey, don't be weird. 2) Ok honey, i won't be weird, I'll be whatever you want me to be.
- 21789 : It's okay, I wouldn't remember me either.
- 23002 : What's the matter, mental boy, forget to take your meds today?
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