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QUOTE NUMBER : QUOTE
- 249 : Luke! I am your father!
- 808 : I'm picking up on your sarcasm
- 810 : that's when the whores come in
- 1213 : #1 Alot of people go to college for 7 years. #2 I know. They're called doctors.
- 1662 : Tommy likey! Tommy want wingy!!
- 1663 : He's a big dumb animal, isn't he folks?
- 1664 : #1 I think you'll be ok here. They have a thin candy sell, i'm srprised you didn't know that. #2 I think your brain has a thick candy shell #1 your brain has the shell on it #2 are you talking? #1 shut up, richard.
- 1665 : Quit playin' with your dingy!
- 1797 : could of done with out that
- 2299 : Well wooptie freakin dooo!!!!!
- 2403 : Brothers don't shake hands, brothers hug
- 2488 : Does this suit make me look fat? No, your face does!
- 2635 : #1 It's a clip-on #2...Ya think?
- 2636 : #1 It's a clip-on #2...Are you sure?
- 3102 : 1-How do we look? 2-Chubby.
- 3831 : Fat man in a little coat, fat man in a little coat
- 4267 : Let me tell you why I suck as a Salesman. Say I walk into some guys office and he's even remotely interested in buying something. Well then I get all excited and I'm like Jo-Jo the idiot circus boy with a pretty new pet. The pet, is my possible sale. Oh my pretty little pet. I love you. So I stroke it....and I pet it....and I massage it. And I love my little naughty pet. You're naughty. And then I take my naughty pet and I go....AHHHH! I killed it. I killed my sale!.
- 4268 : Did I hear a niner in there? Were ya calling from a walkie-talkie?
- 4269 : What'd you do??!!!???
- 4996 : god you're sick
- 6126 : Your sail is limp,like your your dick!!
- 6270 : I know where you live, and ive seen where you sleep, and your mothers will cry when they see what I've done to you!
- 6271 : I know where you live, and ive seen where you sleep, and your mothers will cry when they see what I've done to you!
- 6709 : tommy need sleepy
- 6914 : Here's a scene of what would happen when you're using our brake pads. You're driving along,driving along when all of a sudden atruck stops in front of you--EEEEEEEEEE-whoa, that was close. Here's what would happen with the other guy's brake pads. You're driving along, your kids whing in the back I gotta go to the bathroom daddy,Shut up back there! when the truck stops in front of you stops suddenly----EEEEEEEEEE- I can't stop! WHAM WHAM WHAM- O my god we're burning alive! O my god there's a cliff! Here comes the meat wagon, doo doo doo doo,and the guy steps out and says, OH MY GOD, and the guy down the corner is puking his guts out--BLEEEEH BLEEEH- All because you want a save a few pennies.
- 7474 : LUKE...I AM YOUR FATHER!
- 8017 : Hey, if you want me to take a dump in a box and mark it guaranteed I will, I got spare time.
- 8185 : Richard were you watching spanktrovision? Maybe you were watching that funny comedian Buddy Wackit. Oh there's a pretty girl down there maybe she's one of the YANKEES.
- 8394 : My fights not with you I was only playin person#2 Well I wasn't
- 8467 : Sure! All you can handle bro!
- 8468 : No offence man, but if I took a picture of your mom to the guys back at the dorms... she'd definatly be Boner of the Month!
- 8983 : You hang on to a car like this...sort of like your luggage.
- 9141 : Fat man in a little coat
- 9176 : Did I catch a niner in there, were you calling from a walkie-talkie
- 9573 : 1) Don't worry, they have a thin candy shell! 2)Yeah, well your head has a thick candy shell! 1)Well, your head...has a shell on it. 2)You talking? 1)Shut up!
- 9574 : Mommy mommy!!!! The rhino's coming too close to the car!!!
- 9575 : Excuse me? This'll only take a second!
- 9576 : 1)We're taking a dead deer to the vet? 2)Why not, we take you to the vet. 1)Yeah, well, we'll.... take....you...to...the vet. 2)You got that? 1)Shut up, Richard!
- 9577 : 1)La, looo lah lah, Luke, Luuuke, I am your father. 2)Oh, I see I interrupted happy time.
- 9578 : 1)Housekeeping! Want me to...jerk you off?? 2)What kind of hotel is this?
- 9579 : I was just checkin' the....uh, I was lookin' for the......I'm retarded
- 9825 : That was a pretty girl, do you think she goes out with one of the Yankees??
- 9826 : That's gonna ruin his weekend.
- 10014 : Let me tell you somethin: I could get a look at a good T-bone steak by sticking my head up a cow's ass, but I'd rather take the butcher's word for it.
- 10369 : do you valadate?
- 10892 : Oh look, I've interrupted happy time.
- 11169 : I was checking the specs on the endline for the rotary girder....I'm retarded.
- 11493 : Bees, bees, save yourself, don't be a hero!
- 11690 : And the next thing you know theres change missing from yuor drsser and your daughters knocked up, I've seen it a million times.
- 11696 : I've seen a lot of things in my life But........THAT......WAS........AWESOME!
- 11814 : I think YOUR brain has a thin candy...shut up Richard.
- 11817 : Awesome, i can put six packs if b...soda in here.
- 12430 : Brothers don't shake hands. Brothers gotta hug!
- 12472 : Look at all those pretty maids all in a row.
- 12473 : Ah...prehistoric forest
- 12474 : Son-of-a...that's gonna leave a mark
- 12544 : I make car parts for the working man, cause that's who I am, and that's who I care about.
- 12674 : My fellow nerds and I will retire to the nerdery with our calculators.
- 12867 : Here comes the meat wagon!!!!!!!!
- 13020 : What the American public doesn't know is what makes them the American public.
- 13263 : Ugh! I can actually hear you getting fatter!
- 13473 : Yeah, but you can't latch the hood too well if you don't take the can out you no-selling-waste-of-space!!!! I swear to God, you're pathetic!!!
- 13877 : No wait it has to be your bull.
- 14416 : I make car parts for the American working man because that's who I am and that's who I care about!
- 14417 : My thing got stuck in my zipper and I got piss all over my pants!!!!
- 15468 : Sir, I need your John Hancock on these. Psh, it's Herbie Hancock.
- 15469 : Sir, I need your John Hancock on these. Psh, it's Herbie Hancock.
- 15504 : A) Sorry, they were.........Richard, what are you doing? B) Doing some paperwork A) But your briefcase is over here, how can you be doing paperwork, hmmmm that's a mystery. Hey that's a really pretty girl over there B) I'm sure it is, let's get some sleep. A) Say, I wonder if she goes out with one of the Yankees. B) I wouldn't know A) Richard, were you watching SPANK-travision? Maybe that really funny comedian is on there, oh what's his name, Buddy WHACKETT? Who's your favorite Little Rascal...is it Alfalfa, or SPANKY.............sinner
- 15506 : A) Fat guy little coat B) Put it down, dickhead, I'm serious A) (Singing) Fat guyyy in a little coooat
- 16174 : A) Does this tie make me look fat? B) No, your face does
- 17541 : A) I'm sorry, I'm not my dad. B) No you're not your dad. That man could sell a ketchup popsicle to a woman in white gloves
- 17689 : ...and every time we drive I just want to jerk the wheel into a god damn BRIDGE ENBANKMENT!!!.....(outside) I can't believe he called me a psycho.
- 17690 : ...and every time we drive I just want to jerk the wheel into a god damn BRIDGE ENBANKMENT!!!.....(outside) I can't believe he called me a psycho.
- 18529 : A) You know, lotsa people go to college for seven years B) Yeah, they're called doctors
- 18867 : Brothers don't shake hands, brothers gotta HUG!
- 18907 : What if the garauntee fairy is a crazy glue sniffer? Build model airplanes he says well I'm not buying it. Let him in the house once is all it takes, next thing you know, your daughter is knocked up and there is change missing from your dresser. I have seen it happen a million times.
- 19499 : Holy Shnikes!
- 20318 : I know you'd love to sit here and continue being not slim, but we've got work to do.
- 20383 : Its called reading, left to right, top to bottom, you form words into a sentence. Take asprin for any headaches, mydol for cramps.
- 20715 : You'd better pray to the God of Skinny Punks that this wind doesn't pick up...because if it does I'm going to come over there and ram an oar up your ass..
- 20716 : You'd better pray to the God of Skinny Punks that this wind doesn't pick up...because if it does I'm going to come over there and ram an oar up your ass..
- 20720 : Shutup, Richard!
- 20897 : (A)Could we get any more moths in here?!!! (B) Ummm.... No, Michele, Richard is just vaccuuming.
- 21580 : "To fasten a seat belt take the little end and stick in the big..,. you know what? If any of you don't know how to fasten a seat belt, hit the call button and Tommy will come back there and hit you with tackhammer because you are a RETARD!"
- 21813 : brothers don't shake hands. Brothers gotta hug!
- 21869 : You could put 6 packs of bee.... soda in here
- 21870 : 1) Housekeeping you want me to jerk you off? 2) what kind of hotel is this?
- 21871 : Who's your favorite little rascal? is it alfalfa, or is it spanky?
- 22016 : Its not John Hancock, it's Herbie Hancock
- 22019 : I had a kidney removed last month, but I still have the other one.
- 22021 : Why say no when it feels so good to say yes?
- 22022 : You have a window! and why shouldn't you? You've been here for a whole 20 minutes.
- 22026 : It's called reading. Top to bottom, left to right. Group words into a sentence. Take tylenol for any headaches, midol for any cramps.
- 22028 : For god sakes would you quit covering you eyes?
- 22030 : (1)Is that for me? (2)No, son thats for me
- 22032 : 1)I've asked ******* to be my wife 2) Wow! Cool!........What's she say?
- 22033 : The average person uses ten percent of their brain. How much do you use? one and a half percent.
- 22035 : If I sent a picture of your mom to some of my friends she'd definetly be "Boner of the Month"
- 22037 : I can't believe you've never been cow tipping before!
- 22039 : Did you eat a lot of paint chips as a kid?
- 22041 : We used to go to Safeway a lot and get caught trying to steal donuts.
- 22042 : I could get a hell of a good look at a T-bone steak by sticking my head up a bull's ass, but I'd rather take the buther's word for it.
- 22136 : (1)Does this shirt make me look fat? (2) No, your Face does.
- 22313 : He could sell a ketchup popsicle to a woman wearing white gloves.
- 22461 : (1) Hi! I'm Earth, have we met? (2) I don't think so......
- 22463 : (1) You take dead animals to the vet? (2) Why not? I’ll take you to the vet.
- 22466 : My dad just died, we just killed bambi, I'm out here getting my ass kicked, and everytime I'm driving on the road I want to jerk the wheel into a god damn bridge impartment!
- 22470 : Hey boys and girls its papa smurf!
- 22471 : Maybe you were watching that movie with that funny comedian...... oh what's his name? Buddy......... Whackit!
- 22864 : If I wanted a kiss I would’ve called your mother.
- 23178 : my dad just died, we just killed bambi, i'm out here gettting my ass kicked, and everytime i'm driving down the road i wanna jerk the wheel into a god damn bridge impartment
- 23229 : A) Oh man, did I get douched in mud! B) Yo chucko, I don't think that's mud!
- 23306 : Tommy likey, Tommy want wingey!!
- 23756 : oh my god...........i PASSED.....I PASSED, I GOT A D+, I'M GONNA GRADUATE!
- 24515 : hey boys and girls its papa smurf!
- 24549 : Brothers don't shake hands, brothers gotta hug!
- 24576 : I can get a good look at a steak by sticking my head up a cows ass, but I'd rather take the butchers word for it!
- 24752 : -You can't send a dead deer to the vet. -Why? I send you to the vet. -I'll send you to the.. - Got that?
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