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Billy Madison - 1995 Movie Quotes


Posted ByQuote
2946 Sooo hot, want to touch the heinie! (full quote)
2946 Stop looking at me, swan! (full quote)
2946 No milk will ever be our milk (full quote)
  NO, I will not make out with you! (full quote)
  #1 did u see that guys balls 2# yeah they were wierd lookin (full quote)
  Hey, kids. It's me. I bet you thought that I was dead, but when I fell over, I just broke my leg and got a hemorrhage in my head. (full quote)
2022 That's assault brotha!.....ya double dare me? (full quote)
  No where in your rambling incoherent response did you come close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. We are all dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul. A simple wrong would'a done just fine (full quote)
  Stop looking at me swan. (full quote)
4105 It's nudie magazine day. (full quote)
4105 It's poop again. (full quote)
  It's another one those flaming bags again! Don't put it out with your boots Ted! Don't tell me my business devil woman! Ahh, Poop again! He called the shit poop! Old Man Clemmons hates shit! This is the greatest night of my life! (full quote)
  he called the shit poop?!?! (full quote)
4186 what a weirdo! (full quote)
1212 It's nudie magazine day! (full quote)
3225 THANK YOU VERY MUCH MS LIPPY! (full quote)
3225 ERIC is pregnant...Congratulations, Dippy ooh...he's kicking he gonna be a soccer player...he is...HE IIIIIIISSSS (full quote)
4294 Sorry doesnt put the delisous tricut crackers in my mouth now does it! (full quote)
4294 Sorry doesnt put the delisous triscut crackers in my mouth now does it. (full quote)
  Actually this is Franks shirt (full quote)
  Actually this is Frank's shirt (full quote)
  T-T-T-T-Today, Junior! (full quote)
4347 That's QUACKTASTIC! (full quote)
  ultraviolet rays bad lotion good ****SMILEY (full quote)
4079 He's gonna be a soccer player. He is. He iiissss. (full quote)
  1. Making fun of a little boy who's trying to read. Are you psycho? Do you not have a soul? 2. I'm sorry. I can't hear you. I've been physically abused in the ear. 1. You keep your mouth shut for the next two weeks, or I'm going to fail you. End of story. 2. I see your lips moving, but I can't make out the words. I'm deaf! (full quote)
  Shampoo is better. I go on first and clean the hair...conditioner is better, i leave the hair sily and smooth. Oh really fool? Really! (full quote)
  Veronica:Tale of Two Citys,I don't think we're up to that one yet billy:I can understand nine words in that books now (full quote)
  where's my snack pack!?!?! (full quote)
4364 1)what day is it? 2) October? (full quote)
  peein your pants is cool (full quote)
  peein your pants is cool (full quote)
5087 If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis. (full quote)
5087 I know who stole those lunches...it was that damn sasquatch!!!! (full quote)
4105 (Singing) Suntan lotion is good for me. You protect me.. Tee Hee Hee (full quote)
4307 1. Do you remember that spelling bee that you won in the first grade? 2. Oh, no. You didn't. 1. Rock. R-O-K. 2. So, what's your point? 1. R-O-C-K! 2. The 'C' is silent. (full quote)
  How about you sideburns? You want some of this milk? (full quote)
5167 That is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your incoherent, rambling response, did you come close to making what could be considered a rational thought. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul. (full quote)
5167 How about you sideburns? You want some of this milk? (full quote)
5167 Great! Grand! Wonderful! No yelling on the bus! (full quote)
  BILLY: Bunt. B-U-N-T, in perfect cursive. Got any more brain-busters? VERONICA: How about 'Rizzuto'? (BILLY writes) Rirruto? BILLY: Those're Z's. VERONICA: They look like R's to me. BILLY: You're cheating! Rizzuto's not a word! He's a baseball player! VERONCIA: Would you like to try the word 'buzz'? (full quote)
  Talliwhowho Sabadu Gaylo (full quote)
  YOU BLEW IT!!!! (full quote)
  Those came with the tent! (full quote)
  oh i see what's goin' on here. (full quote)
  Ta-ta-ta-today junior! (full quote)
  Whoa, whoa, whoa Miss Lippy. The part of the story I dont like is that the little boy gave up looking for Happy after an hour. That little boy's gotta think, youve got a PET youve got a RESPONSIBILITY. WHen your dog gets lost, you dont look for an hour and call it quits, you get your ass out there and you find that fucking dog! (full quote)
  Shampoo is better. It goes on first and cleans the hair. NO! conditioner is better, it leaves the hair silky and smooth. (full quote)
  Mr. Madison...there NO pengiun! you had too much sun today...there NO pengiun! (full quote)
  chlorophyll, more like boropyll!! (full quote)
  Well if peeing your pants is cool consider me Miles Davis. (full quote)
  oh, you're the quick one!!!! (full quote)
  (sung) Billy: yes, i will go back to school and acheive victory no man will take what my father has built unless that man is meee veronica: my billy, sweet billy boy i knew you owuld go back no one can stop you if you try don't i have a nice rack *nods* billy: veronica, i thank you for beating the shit out of me i see things so clearly now i choose my destiny!!! veronica: *oh billy, i knew ya had it in ya!!!* (full quote)
  billy madison:actually this shirt belongs to frank (full quote)
  It's too damn hot for a penguin to be walking around out here! (full quote)
  Yahoo for school! Yahoo for me! (full quote)
  Fine you can stay home and help me shave my armpits!!!!!!1 (full quote)
  (billy): you had an accident? what does that mean, GOOOO!!! (full quote)
  dont put it out with your boots ted (full quote)
  Carl! good to see ya! (full quote)
  stay here and you can light bags of shit on fire in my living room (full quote)
  i drwe a blue duck because i've never seen a blue duck and i wanted to see a blue duck (full quote)
  Sooo hot want to touch the heiny arrooooo (full quote)
  i had a bad case of loser denial myself (full quote)
  Sometimes I feel like an Idiot. But I am an Idiot, so it kinda works out. (full quote)
  Hey mister, guess what i had for breakfast? BEANS (full quote)
  Ohh back to school back to school, to prove to dad that I'm not a fool. I got my lunch all packed, my shoes tied tight, I hope I don't get in a fight...ohh back to school (full quote)
  1)Carl do that stupid laugh that Eric does 2)Wheeeeheheheheheheh 1)Yeah that's it. (full quote)
  c-o-r....r....are you going to the mall later that's what i'm asking no i am not going to the mall, keep spelling mister (full quote)
  c-o-r....r....are you going to the mall later that's what i'm asking no i am not going to the mall, keep spelling mister (full quote)
  what is a horseshoe?? what does a horseshoe do?? Are there any horse socks?? Is anybody listening to me?? (full quote)
836 (SUNG) hey kids it me, I bet you thought that I was dead, but when I fell I broke my leg and got a haemorige in my head! (full quote)
4307 1. Who would you rather bone? Jack Nicholson or Meg Ryan? 2. Jack Nicholson now, or 1974. 1. 1974. 2. Meg Ryan. (full quote)
4307 1. I'm sick, I swear. I can't go to school. 2. If you're going to stay home, you can help me shave my armpits. (full quote)
4904 1. Rerrudo? 2. Those are z's. 1. They look like r's to me. 2. That's not fair! Rezzudo isn't even a word, he's a baseball player. 1. Would you like to try the word buzz? (full quote)
4904 Cholrophyl!? more like boraphyl! (full quote)
4904 1. Oh snack packs! You're the coolest! 2. Those should last you through the weekend. (full quote)
4904 YOU BLEW IT! (full quote)
4904 If peeing in your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis. (full quote)
4904 Tttttttday junior! (full quote)
4969 Mr. Madison, what you just said is one of the most insanely, idiotic things that I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent reponse were you even close to anything that can be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul (full quote)
5045 is that is dad? did the penguin tell you to do this? (full quote)
5167 (Farley)That Veronica Vaughn is one piece of ace. I know from experience dude. (Billy) No you don't. (Farley) Well this guy I knew, him and her got it on, WHOOO-EEEE! (Billy) No they didn't. (Farley) No, no they didn't. But you could imagine what it'd be like if they did, eh? eh? (full quote)
5167 (Scotty) Mortal Kombat for Sega Genesis is the greatest video game ever. (Billy) I disagree, although it is a very good game, I think Donkey Kong is the greatest video game ever. (Scotty) Donkey Kung sucks! (Billy) You know what? You suck! (full quote)
5167 The people at the zoo are very nice Penguin. They'll treat you real respectable like. (full quote)
5167 I thought I was your snack pack (full quote)
5167 Have some more SLOPPY joes. I made em extra sloppy for yas, cause I know how you kids likes em sloppy. (Billy) Lady, you're scaring us! (full quote)
5167 No I will not make out with you! (full quote)
5323 We are so lucky to have principle Anderson as a substitute. Now we have the privelage to sit and watch that fat tub of lard all day. If i were him i'd walk my fat ass into on coming traffic. (full quote)
5373 You get your ass out there and you find that fucking dog! (full quote)
5910 Hey Tubby, how bout a little bathroom reading? I've got the 1983 issue of wrestling world. Where'd you get that? Oh I have a subscription. Its got a great article on a wrestler named the revolting blob. Ya know somethin, he kinda looks like someone I know. Gee bad guy, he threw one apponent out of the ring and hit a bunch of senior citizens. Boy this wacko sure looks familiar. My god, in June, 1983 he sat on some guys head, and killed him. It was just a stunt, he was soposed to pinch my led if he was running short of air. Well with this guy sitting on everyones head and all, i wonder how he had time to get his teaching degree. (full quote)
5967 It's nudie magazine day!! (full quote)
6029 Whoa, whoa, whoa, Miss Lippy the part of the story I dont like is that the little boy gave up looking for Happy after an hour. That little boys gotta think youve got a PET youve got a RESPONSIBILITY. If your dog gets lost you dont look for an hour and call it quits, you get your ass out there and you find that fucking dog! (full quote)
6029 Youve got a mis-shaped head. Thank you. (full quote)
6029 Its too damn hot for a PENGUIN to be just walking around here! I've gotta get you back to the zoo! Im one of the good guys penguin dont run...WATCH OUT!..Oh, youre a quick one.....Now Ive got you...(thud)...LEG! (full quote)
6034 Please no jibberish. I beg you, no jibberish tonight. (full quote)
6106 1: Congragulations Billy, You just passed the first grade! 2:WOW, what do you think about that Mr. Duck 3: That's quacktastic! (full quote)
6106 In this decathalon I want no cheating!!! Especially with my wife, who is a dirty, dirty tramp. (full quote)
6355 O'Doyle rules!!!!! (full quote)
6383 Ooh, that boy is a fine piece of work, alright. He's a fine piece of ass, though, too! (full quote)
6442 (eric)where the hell is he? I'm starvn! (carl) A ate some triscuit crackers in the car...you should've had some (eric) well maybe if yo uhad told me there were delicios triscuit crackers i could've enjoyed them with you. (carl)I'm sorry (eric)well sorry doens't put the triscuit crackers in my stomach, does it, carl? (full quote)
6443 (eric)where the hell is he? I'm starvn! (carl) A ate some triscuit crackers in the car...you should've had some (eric) well maybe if yo uhad told me there were delicios triscuit crackers i could've enjoyed them with you. (carl)I'm sorry (eric)well sorry doens't put the triscuit crackers in my stomach, does it, carl? (full quote)
6445 Eric, come on, let's not throw ice at billy...HE'S SLEEPING!!! (full quote)
6660 chlorophyll, more like BOROPHYLL! (full quote)
6814 Stop looking at me swan! (full quote)
6884 im so sorry to interrupt. proceed (full quote)
6884 i am the smartest man alive!!! (full quote)
6905 Juanita: If you stay home from school, you can help me shave my armpits! Billy: Oh My God I'll Go To School! (full quote)
7227 Mr. Madison, what you just said is one of the most insanely, idiotic things that I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent reponse were you even close to anything that can be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul. (full quote)
7318 Ohhhh. I see whats goin on here. So soooory to interuuupt! (full quote)
7643 O'Doyle rules!!! (full quote)
7643 A:I dare you to touch her boobs. B:That's assault buddy.- you double dare me?? (full quote)
7643 If peein your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis. (full quote)
8034 Scotty likes beans, dont you scotty? (kid shakes his head) (full quote)
8372 Do you have any more gum more gum more gum, do you have any more gum! (song) (full quote)
8487 1) Hey, why do I have to go back all the way to kindergarten?! I did well in the grade! 2) Spell the word 'rock'. Your answer: r-o-k. (full quote)
8487 That kid should get off his fat ass and find that fuckin' dog! (full quote)
8585 **Singing** Back to school, back to school, to prove to dad that i'm not a fool! I've got my lunch packed up, and my boots tied tight, i hope i don't get in a fight. OOOO Back to school..... (full quote)
8650 I'd rather have a beer (full quote)
8793 That is corrrrect. (full quote)
  GOO (full quote)
  Clown: Hey Kids! I bet you thought that I was dead!! But I just broke my leg!!! And got a hemerage in my head!!! (full quote)
  it is cool....to pee your pants! peeing your pants is the cooooolllist!!! (full quote)
  Mr.Madison, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I've ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul. (full quote)
  Hey Harold, good TO SEE YOU!!! (full quote)
  Is that it dad? Did the penguin tell you to do this? (full quote)
  Shampoo is better I go on first and clean the hair. No conditionar is better i make the hair silky and smooth. Oh really fool really. Ah...Ah...Ah. Stop looking at me swan (full quote)
  what...did you fall in love with the wall or something.... (full quote)
  ~Shampoo is better i go on first and clean the hair...conditioner is better i leave the hair feel silky and smooth...oh really fool?? REALLY! Stop looking at me swan~ ~ Your not cool unless you pee your pants~ ~So sorry to interrupt~ ~So go on wit the class~ (full quote)
  that is 1 of the most insanly idiotic things I hav eva heard at no point in ur incoherent ramblin response did u come close 2 makin wut could b considered a rational thought everybody in this room is now dumber for having listened to it, I award u no points n may God hav mercy on ur soul (full quote)
  billy passed the 3rd grade... oooh what a glorious daaaay... billy passed the 3rd grade... the billy madison waaay!! (billy) yeeah, ROCK ON! (full quote)
  O'Doyle: O'Doyle RULES! Billy: You know what o'doyle i have a feelin your whole family's going down but right know i got to study (full quote)
  Good morning Miss Vaughn! Were gonna start today by reading together a short story entitled My Sister Fanny. HAHAHA Ok so let's all open our reading is fun books to page 69. 69, heheh. (full quote)
  If peeiin your pants is cool, concider me Miles Davis! (full quote)
  (whisper) Ask her...ask her...if she likes anybody from claaaaasss (full quote)
  Mr Madison: oh billy boy, when will you find what you are looking for? NEXT SCENE Billy: here's a nice piece of shit! (full quote)
  Do you have any more gum....more gum...more gum (full quote)
  Veronica I thank you for beating the shit out of me (full quote)
  I thought I was yo snack pack. (full quote)
  Its too damn hot for a penguin to be just WALKin around (full quote)
  that boys a fine piece of work alright, he's a fine piece of ass though too! (full quote)
  1. who would you rather bone..meg ryan or jack nickleson? 2. jack nickleson NOW or 1967? 1. mmm 1967 2. .....meg ryan (full quote)
  oh my God I am the winner. (full quote)
  he called the shit POOP! HAHAHA!!! (full quote)
  who would eat 32 bagger lunches? - i'll tell ya who, it was that damn sasquach (full quote)
  if peein in your pants is cool, consider me miles davis (full quote)
  i thought i was your snack pack (full quote)
  if you're gonna stay home, you can help me shave my aaaarmpits-- oh god i'll go to school (full quote)
  eric is pregnat come here.. feel those kicks he gonna be a soccer player he is ...he iiiiiiissssss (full quote)
  eric is pregnat come here.. feel those kicks he gonna be a soccer player he is ...he iiiiiiissssss (full quote)
  That's assault brotha (full quote)
  T-t-t-today junior! (full quote)
  Stop looking at me swan! (full quote)
  Shampoo is better. i go on first and i clean the hair. conditioner is better. I leave the hair silky and smooth. oh really fool? (full quote)
  It's too damn hot for a penguin to be running around. (full quote)
  NO YELLING ON THE BUS (full quote)
  69! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! (full quote)
  Doing the bull dance...feeling the flow...working it, working it (full quote)
  QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK (IIIIIICCCCCEEELLLANNNDD) (full quote)
  If pising your pants is cool then you can consider me Miles Davis. (full quote)
  (Billy waiting and singing) Oh back to school,back to school,to prove to dadda that I'm not a fool,oh I got my lunch pack packed,my shoes tied tight,I hope I don't get in a fight!!,Oh back to school,back to school... (full quote)
  1. You don't want to hang out with a bunch elementary school kids like us anymore. 2. That's not true. I visit you guys all the time. 3. Yeah, to see your girlfriend. Ooooh-ooooh. (full quote)
  Whoa, whoa, whoa, Miss Lippy, the part I don't like is that the kid stopped looking for Happy for about an hour. He didn't put posters up or anything, he just sat on the porch like a goon and waited. That boy's gotta think, you got a pet. When your dog gets lost, you don't wait for an hour after looking for him. You get your ass out there and find that fuckin' dog! (full quote)
  (billy) there was something i had to do today but i can't remember what it is. (friend) what drink 10 margaritas? already did that! (billy) oh i know! it's nudie magazine day! (full quote)
  (billy)I'll trade you this bannana for your snack-pack.(kid)Shakes his head no.(billy) You know how badly I can beat you.(Kid) shakes his head yes (full quote)
  1)yes...i will go BACK to school and achieve victory...no one will take what my father has built unless that man is me 2) my billy...sweet billy boy...i knew u would go back...nothing can stop u if u try...dont i have a nice rack 1) veronica i thnka u...for beating the shit out of me...i see things so clearly now...i choose my destiny 2)oh billy i knew u had it in ya 3) we're here to help u billy...get back in school to stay...u gotta work real hard...and stick it out...til graduation day... 4)hey! kids...its me! bet u thought that i was dead...but when i fell over i just broke my leg and got a hemorhage in my head! 3) there are obsitcles in the way 5) in the way 3)but together we will over come 5) OVER COME! 3) but u cant break a spirit and u cant kill a dream 5) DREAM!!! 3 do u have anymore gum more gum more gum more gum 1) DO YOU HAVE ANYmore GUM (full quote)
  back to school back to school to prove to dad i am not a fool i got my back pack on my back my boots tied tight i hope i dont get in a fight (full quote)
  mortal combat fro sega genisis is the best game ever. i dissagree although mortal combat is a very good game i think donkey kong is the best game ever. donkey kong sucks. you know somthin you suck. (full quote)
  He called the shit poop! (full quote)
  Billy: Peein' yo' pants, is the coolest! Old Tour guide: If peein' yo' pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis! Billy: Eeew! That's the most disgusting thing I have ever heard in my life, let's go! (full quote)
  Mr Ed: Speak for yourself moron! billy : OHh MY GOD, THAT IS FUNNY!!!!!!! (full quote)
  Whoa, whoa, whoa, Ms. Lippy! The part of the story I don't like, is that the little boy gave looking for Happy after an HOUR! He didn't put posters up or anything, he just sat on the porch like a goon and waited. He's gotta think, you have a pet! You got a responsibility! If your dog is lost you don't look for an hour and call it quits! You get your ass out there and you find that fuckin' dog! Ms Lippy: I think it's time to play dodgeball. (full quote)
  it's way too hot for a penguin to just be walking around here (full quote)
  (1)that veronica vaughn ish one shweet piece of asssh! (2) yeah(1)me and her GOT IT OOON!!! (ghna, ghna) (2) no you didn't (1) no, but you can imagine what it would be like though (2) (pat on the back) (1) NO SHOUTING ON THE BUS!! (full quote)
  T-T-T-T-TODAY, JUNIAAAH! (full quote)
  (1) ...we've got some important inforamtion for you (2)aaaaawww erwic's pregnant! (pat, pat) he's kicking.... he's gonna be a soccer player...he is...he iiiiiiiis! (full quote)
  Stop looking at me swan (full quote)
  Hey Carl, good to see you! (full quote)
  what day is it??? October... Its nudie magizine day (full quote)
  Mr.Madison. billy I have some news billy. ERIC is pregnant oh its kickin hes gonna be a soccor player!! yeah yeah (full quote)
  What do you care now you dont ever have to look for a job. now dont you needsome rest you got a big day ahead of you filled with nintendo's and jack off magizines. (full quote)
  Billy: I'm sick, I swear to God I can't go to school. Maid: If you stay home, you can help me shave my armpits, HAHA! Billy: Oh myyy God, I'll go to school. (full quote)
  your gunna give the company to ERIC! HE IS A BAD BAD MAN! (full quote)
  Father: You GRADuated because I paid your teachers to give you descent grades! Billy: I don't believe that. Father: Well what do you believe? that you were an honors student!? Billy: (Shrugs).. Father: How am I suppose to give the company to someone who couldn't even get through high school, On His OWN. Billy: Wa- I don't know, don't think about it, jus' hand it over. (Gives thumbs up) (full quote)
  and if either contestant attempts to cheat.. especially with my wife.. who is a dirty, dirty tramp.. I will just have to snap. (full quote)
  Mr. madison what you just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things i have ever heard. At no point in your rambling incoherent response were you weven clost to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul! (full quote)
  Any attempt to cheat, especially with my wife, who is a dirty dirty tramp, and i am just gonna snap! (full quote)
  Who would you rather bone, Meg Ryan or Jack nicholson? Jack Nicholson now or 1974? 1974. Meg Ryan (full quote)
  Your only cool if you pee in your pants (full quote)
  Your only cool if you pee in your pants (full quote)
  BILLY: (singing)back to sckool, back to school, to prove to dad that i'm not a fool, i got my lunch packed up my boots tied tight, i hope i don't get in a fight...ohh back to school back to school back to.. school... (full quote)
  MISS LIPPY: billy..billy you forgot your stuff...(billy looking at her like wtf?!) billY: THANK YOU VERY MUCH MISS LIPPY!!! (full quote)
  would you like me to take my shirt of for you? (full quote)
  yes well you can have the mucus queen (full quote)
  1)hey look billy peed his pants 2)course i peed my pants its the cool thing to do 1)hey look ernie peed his pants to (full quote)
  O'Doyle rules!! (full quote)
  Thats Quacktastic! (full quote)
  It's too damn hot for a penguin to be walking around here! (full quote)
  1)It's one of theose flaming bags again. 2)Don't put it out with your boods, Ted. 1) Don't tell me my business, Devil Woman! Call the fire department, this one's getting out of control...it's poop again! ...He called the shit, poop! (full quote)
3536 Hello Ms. Vaughn, hi its earnie from class. (full quote)
4927 A) Are ya fallin in love with the wall or somethin? B) I kinda had an accident. A) Waddya mean you had an acci... GOO!!! (full quote)
4927 A) That Veronica Vaughn is one piece of ace. I know from experience. B) No you don't. A) No, I don't, but a guy I know...him and her GOT...IT...ON! B) No they didn't. A) No, they didn't. But you can imagine what it'd be like if they did, huh...huh? (full quote)
6650 Talkie Talkie Talkie no more Talkie (full quote)
8034 Ya double-dare me?! (full quote)
8034 We're here to help you billy, get back to school to stay....you gotta work real hard and keep it up til graduation day!!! (full quote)
8034 Oh, Eric's gonna have a baby! Congradulations!! Oh, he's kickin'! He's gonna be a soccer player! (full quote)
8251 what's wrong, Ernie, you fall in love with the wall? (full quote)
9648 Bath, thats a little easy, why don't you just give her the trophy. (full quote)
9648 69, heheh. (full quote)
9773 I drew the duck blue because I have never seen a blue duck, and quite frankly, I wanted to see a blue duck. (full quote)
9857 y> Hey look at all this milk... do you want some of this milk?? That milk belongs to that classroom. billy> Well they don't gots to know about it. It could be our milk. No milk will ever be our milk. billy> Ohh that wasn't very nice!! How bout you sideburns, you want some milk? I'd rather have a beer... (full quote)
9857 whoa whoa whoa miss lippy... the part of the story i don't like is that the little boy gave up looking for happy after an hour? he didn't put posters up or anything he just sat on the porch like a goon and waited... that boy's gotta think... you gotta pet, you getta responsibility. if your dog is lost you don't look for an hour and call it quits, you get your ass out there and you FIND THAT FUCKIN DOG!!!.............. i think it's time to play dodgeball. (full quote)
10029 mr madison, wat u just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things i have ever heard...at no point in your rambling, incoherent response were u even close to anything that could even be considred a rational thought. everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may god have mercy on your soul. (full quote)
10165 billy goddammit how many f*** times have i told u not to speak in jibberish...... bye billy Sabador....vocour (full quote)
11376 No I WILL NOT make OUT WITH YOU! haha u got chlorophyll man up there talking about God Knows WHAT?! and all she's talkin about is makin out with me...Please Continue (full quote)
11718 1/Billy... what are you doing 2/ I'm out 1/ Well that useally means that you sit out for the rest of that game 2/ Nah it's ok i would rather just stay here and colour 2/ Billy dodgeball time is a very special time.... not just for you kids for Miss Lippy aswell..... so stay outside (full quote)
11971 Here's a nice piece of shit (full quote)
11971 (1)Did you see that guy's balls (2) Yeah, they were gross (full quote)
12243 Chlorophyl, more like BORE-aphyl. (full quote)
12248 He called the shit poop! (full quote)
12315 He called the shit poop! (full quote)
12315 Tabadoohoo Yagaboo. Talihoohoo. GAYOO! (full quote)
12466 Who got da ligher? (full quote)
13181 Man, am I glad I called THAT guy!!! (full quote)
13252 NO I WILL NOT MAKE OUT WITH YOU! Did you hear that? She wants to make out with me in the middle of class? We've got chlorophyll man talkin' about God knows what, and all she can say is how much she wants to make out with me! I'm hear to learn, everybody, not to make out with you! Go on with the chlorophyll! (full quote)
13252 If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis. (full quote)
13307 1: Mr. Madison, what you have just said, is one of the most insanely idiotic things i've ever heard, At no point during your rambling, incoherant response, were you even close to anything that could have been considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber having listened to it. i award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul. 2: Ok, a simple WRONG would have done just fine, but... (full quote)
13461 1. Rock? R O K? 2.The c is silent (full quote)
13629 If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis. (full quote)
13655 Shampoo is better, I go on first and clean the hair. conditioner is better, I leave the hair silky and smooth. Oh really fool? Oh really fool? (full quote)
14200 The muccus queen...is yours (full quote)
14213 1. The mucas queen is yours! 2. Thanks! (full quote)
14298 ERIC!? You're gonna give the company to Eric? He is a BAD, BAD man! (full quote)
14345 1)Ask her if she would go out with anybody from class. 2)No! 1)JUST DO IT!!! (full quote)
14345 (singing) Suntan lotion is good for me, you protect me tee hee hee... (full quote)
14345 1)Heh heh heh. Hey, Billy, I just thought of the funniest thing--Billy? Where's Billy?! 2)He's in school, man. 1)Oh yeah! (full quote)
14345 1)Max. what can I say? You saved my life. 2)You don't have to say anything, I'm so proud of you. I'm still horny. (full quote)
14345 I think...it's time...to play...dodgeball. (full quote)
14345 1)I'm so depressed. 2)Want me to take my shirt off for you? (full quote)
14345 1)Mr. Madison seems nice. 2)If I see you talking to that boy again, I'll throw you out the window! You heard me? (full quote)
14345 1)Now let's all turn our Reading is Fun books to page 69-- 2)69! HAHAHAHAHA! (full quote)
14345 what is a horseshoe? what does a horseshoe do? Are there any horsesocks? Is anybody listening to me...? (full quote)
14345 1)Sorry about that. Damn guy drives like an animal! 2)Huh? 3)It's okay, Billy. Just go back to your seat. 1)Okay. 3)I double dare you. 1)But I--accident... (full quote)
14345 Yep. Here we go again. Another treat from the road. Great. Grand. Wonderful. Great banana. Trick of the day. Great... (full quote)
14345 Everybody on? Good. Great. Grand. Wonderful. NO YELLING ON THE BUS!!! (full quote)
14345 I think crazy Karl is right. (full quote)
14345 1)Hey Ernie. what's up? 2)Nothing. 1)You falling in love with the wall or something? 2)I had an accident. 1)You had an accident? what does that mean--GOOOO! (full quote)
14345 1)Hey, look everybody! Billy peed his pants! 2)Of course I peed my pants! Everybody my age pees their pants, it's the coolest! 1)Really? 2)YES!! You ain't cool unless you pee your pants! 1)Hey, man. Ernie peed his pants too! All right! 3)If peeing your pants is cool, then consider me Miles Davis. (full quote)
14345 1)Hey, you wanna feed that donkey some beer? Get it all messed up? 2)Maybe later. 1)I'll go put some beer in a bucket. (full quote)
14526 But, peeing your pants is the coolest!!! (full quote)
14871 That Ms. Vaughn is one fine peice of ace (ass) this guy I know and her got it ON! No they didnt. Yea but if they did woweeeee! (full quote)
14969 students: Ms. Vaughn, Ms Vaughn...someone stoled all our lunches Ms. Vaughn: Who would steal 30 baged lunches Old Lady: I'll tell you who it was it was that damn Sasquash (full quote)
14969 Billy passed the third grade oh what a day (full quote)
14969 Ms. Vaughn: what you say Billy (as Ernie): uh see you tomorrow in class Ms. Vaughn (hangs up) Billy: YOU BLEW IT (full quote)
15088 1.) Geez what's up her butt? 2.) What's that Billy? 3.)I said reading is good can we start the story now? (full quote)
15933 1.) That Veronica Vaughn is one piece of ace. I know from experience dude, if you know what I mean. 2.) No you don't 1.) Not me personally but a guy I know. Him and her got it on! WOOOWEEE!! 2.) No they didn't! 1.) No..no no they didn't.. but you can image what it would be like though? (full quote)
15933 1.) (Dog on TV) Speak for yourself moron! 2.) hahahha OH MY GOD that is FUNNY!! (full quote)
16070 Shampoo is better, it cleans the hair. No, conditoner is better- it leaves the hair silky and smooth. Oh really, fool? Really! Stop looking at me sssswwwaann! (full quote)
16070 Hahahahaha.... SHUT UP!! (full quote)
16070 Clown: Hey kids, it's me- I bet ya thought that I was dead, but when I feel over I just broke my neck and got a hemerage in my head! (full quote)
16070 No I will not make out with you! This guy's up here talking about God knows what, and all you want to do is make out with me! (full quote)
16070 Chyrofill, more like BORE-ifill! (full quote)
16156 That is correct! (full quote)
16156 O'Doyle rules! (full quote)
17741 STOP LOOKING AT ME SWAN!!!! (full quote)
17783 No I will not make out with you! We got clorophyll man up here talkin about God knows what and all you wanna talk about is makin out with me! I'm here to learn people, not to make out with you. Go OOONN with the clorophyll!! (full quote)
18106 It could be our milk (full quote)
18796 Chlorophyll? more like BORE-ophyll (full quote)
19330 ....and if anyone is caught cheating, especially with my wife, who is a dirty, dirty tramp.... (full quote)
19378 Shampoo is better, I go on first and clean the hair! No, conditioner is better! I leave the hair silky and smooth! Oh really fool? Really! .... STOP LOOKING AT ME SWAN!! (full quote)
20107 1: Mr. *******, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul. 2: A simple no would've done just fine. (full quote)
20557 Shampoo is better. I go on first and clean the hair. conditioner is better. I leave the hair silky and smoothe. Oh really fool? Really?.... Stop looking t me swan! (full quote)
20557 If peeing in your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis (full quote)
20557 billy likes to drink soda. Ms Lippy's car is green. (full quote)
21066 Stop looking at me swan! (full quote)
21066 Stop looking at me swan! (full quote)
21079 O'doyle rules!!! (full quote)
22367 I always feel like an idiot..but I am an idiot so it kinda works out! (full quote)
CCas no milk will ever be our milk. (full quote)
22974 If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis! (full quote)
  if peeing your pants is cool consider me Miles Davis (full quote)
  Little kid on bus: I dare you to touch her boobs Billy: Touch her boobs? That's assult brotha! Ya double dare me. teacher: Why don't you go sit down now Billy I double dare ya! Billy..I see I tit go sit down (full quote)
  Mr. Madison, what you just said is the most insanely idiotic thing I have ever heard. At no point in you incoherent rambling response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. We are all now dumber for having had listened to it. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul!! (full quote)
  Stop looking at me swan! (full quote)
  It's too damn hot for a penguin to be just walkin' around?! (full quote)
  (Both Drunk) 1. Hey look, I think Billy and his girlfriend are playing water polo! 2. Maybe they're playing Marco Polo... MARCO! 1. POLO! What a great game! (full quote)
  (Both Drunk) 1. Hey look, I think Billy and his girlfriend are playing water polo! 2. Maybe they're playing Marco Polo... MARCO! 1. POLO! What a great game! (full quote)
  Stay here! As long as long as you can! You have to cherish it... cherish it... (full quote)
  When I graduated first grade all my old man did was tell me to get a job. (full quote)
  Ump)Out! billy) Out? Ump) I think you were out. billy) I think you're gonna die! (full quote)
  he called the shit poop (full quote)
  billY: whoa, whoa, ms. lippy the part in the story i don't like is that the little boy gave up looking for the dog after an hour. I mean he didn't put posters up or anything he just sat on the porch like a goon and waited. When your dog is lost you don't look for an hour and call it quits you get your ass out there and you find that fuckin dog! (full quote)
  what about you, sideburns? You want some a dis milk? Rather have a beer... (full quote)
  i'm having a birthday party, and you're not invited (full quote)
  Now, now...maybe its someone else.. (full quote)
  Thank you Veronica, for beating the shit out of me, I see things so clearly now, I choose my destiny! (full quote)
  If peeing your pants is cool, then consider me Miles Davis!! (full quote)
  Shampoo is better, I go on first and clean the hair. **No! conditioner is better. I leave the hair silky and smooth!** Stop lookingat me swan! (full quote)
  Billy, oh Billy boy. When will you find whatever it is you are looking for ... (full quote)
  ublalaalalaldafdkajkjlkjdjfakdjflkaljfda sloooooooow down... djfkdjalkfdjlkjafdjakfdjlkajfld (full quote)
  You ain't cool if you don't pee in your pants!!!!!!!!! (full quote)
  It's too damn hot for a penquin to be just walkin around! (full quote)
  Shampoo is better cause it goes on first and cleans the hair. No conditioner is better it leaves the hair all silky and smooth. Stop looking at me swan. (full quote)
  Shampoo is better cause it goes on first and cleans the hair. No conditioner is better it leaves the hair all silky and smooth. Stop looking at me swan. (full quote)
  (Person1)You wanna go feed that donkey some beer, get it all messed up? (Person2) Maybe later (full quote)
  Stop looking at me swan! (full quote)
  Hey! You are not cool until you pee your pants! (full quote)
  CARL: billy, get a little sun today? billY: Yeah, i fell asleep by the pool. ERIC: Fell asleep? or do you mean passed out? billY: AHAHAHAHA (full quote)
  Billy:I swear to god i'm sick. Juanita: If you stay home, you can help me shave my armpits! (full quote)
  Here's a nice peice of shit. (full quote)
  Juanita:If you stay home from school you can help me shave my arm pits Billy: Thats discusting! alright, alright, i'll go to school! (full quote)
  you ain't cool unless you pee your pants. (full quote)
  Back to school, back to school to show to my daddy that I am no foll. (full quote)
  Kids: Hey look Billy peed his pants Billy: Of course I peed my pants, peeing your pants is cool, everybody my age is doing it Kids: Look Ernie peed his pants too (High Five Ernie) cool Dude Old Woman: If peeing your pants is cool then consider me Miles Davis Billy: Oh that's got to be one of the most discusting things i have ever heard (full quote)
  woah woah woah miss lippy..the part of the story i dont like is that the little boy gave up looking for happy after an hour..he didnt put posters up or anything he just sat around like a goon and waited. That kids gotta think--you got a pet..you got a responsibility. You dont just look around for and hour and call it quits you get ur ass out there and YOU FIND THAT FUCKIN DOG! (full quote)
  what is a horseshoe? what does a horseshoe do? are there any horsesocks? is anybody listening? (full quote)
  what is a horseshoe? what does a horseshoe do? are there any horsesocks? is anybody listening? (full quote)
  I think its time to play, dodgeball (full quote)
  Who would steal 30 bag lunches? (full quote)
  well your mommys a liar (full quote)
  If peeing your pants is cool,than consider me Miles Davis (full quote)
  oooooooh back to school back to school to proove to dad that im not a fool, i've got my, lunch packed up, my boots tied tight, i hope i dont get in a fight, ooooooh back to school...back...to......school......... (full quote)
  if peeing your pants is cool conider me miles davis (full quote)
  HE called the shit poop!!!!!! (full quote)
  We're here to help you Billy, get back to school today... You gotta work real hard, and stick it out til graduation day. Billy, sweet billy boy, I knew you go back. Noone can stop you if you ty, dont I have a nice rack? Veronica, i thank you for beating the shit outta me. (full quote)
  No I will not make out with you! We've got chlorophyll man talking about GOD knows what and all you're talking about is making out with me! I'm here to learn, not to make out with you, so GO ON WITH THE CHLOROPHYLL! (full quote)
  clorafill more like boorafill!!! (full quote)
  Back to school back to school to prove to daddy i am not a fool i got my shoes tied tight i hope i dont get in a fight back to school back to school [ the bus rides by } (full quote)
  If peein in you pants is cool, call me miles davis (full quote)
  Dont i have a nice rack (full quote)
  Are you (name). Yes I am. Don't you think it's pathetic that just because he's a millionaire? Yes I do. Well, just as long as you know. Alright then. (full quote)
  (Talking to self) Shampoo is better! I go one first and clean the hair! (Responds to self in different voice) Conditioner is better! I help make the hair silky and smooth (Reverts to first voice) Oh really, fool? (Goes to second voice) Really! (Hits bottles together and then drops them in the bath. Looks at swan replica sitting on the counter of the tub) Stop looking at me, swan! (full quote)
  Thats billy...I think he's retarded or something (full quote)
  Any attempt to cheat, especially with my wife, who is a dirty, dirty, tramp, and I am just gonna snap. (full quote)
  Sorry doesn't put the triscuit cracker in my stomach, now does it Carl? (full quote)
  Did you fall asleep or did ya pass out?? (full quote)
  If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis! (full quote)
  Mr. Madison, that was the most insanly idiotic thing i have ever heard in my entire life. At no point in your rambling, incoherent responce were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points and may god have mercy on your soal.... A simple no would have done just fine but.... (full quote)
  Mr. Madison, what you have just said was the most insanly idiotic thing i have ever heard in my entire life. At no point in your rambling, incoherent responce were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points and may god have mercy on your soal.... A simple no would have done just fine but.... (full quote)
  How bout' you sidburns you want some milk i rather have a beer (full quote)
  Frank:oh man billy i just thought of the funniest thing...Billy? Where's billy? Jack:he's in school man Frank:oh yeah (full quote)
  Principal of HS: If there is any attempt by either contestant to cheat, especially with my wife, who is a dirty, dirty tramp, I am just going to snap, do I make my self clear? (full quote)
  Principal of HS: If there is any attempt by either contestant to cheat, especially with my wife, who is a dirty, dirty tramp, I am just going to snap, do I make my self clear? (full quote)
  Principal: Mr. Madison, what you just said is one of the most insanely, idiotic things I have ever heard. No where in your rambling, incoherent response where you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul. Billy Madison: OK, a simple WRONG would have done just fine, but. (full quote)
  Ms. Lippy, the part of the story I don't like, is how the little boy gave up looking for Happy after an hour. He didn't put posters up or anything, he just sat on the porch like a goone and waited. That little boy's gotta think, you gotta a pet, you got a responsibility. If your dog is lost you don't look for an hour and call it quits. YOU GET YOUR ASS OUT THERE AND YOU FIND THAT FUCKEN DOG!!!!! (full quote)
  mr. madison, what you have just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things i have ever heard. at no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. i award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul. (full quote)
  STOP LOOKING AT ME.....SWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (full quote)
  Stop It! i Don't even know you (full quote)
  GOO! (full quote)
  WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!, That's nice! (full quote)
  (Carl)Nice talking to you billy.(billy)talahoohoo, Sabanoo.......GAYLOO!!!!! (full quote)
  Oh no, it's that silly penguin again. It's too damn hot for a penguin to just be wahking aroun' here. I'm gonna have to send you back to the South Pole! (full quote)
  what are horseshoes? Are there horsesocks? Is anybody listening to me? (full quote)
  How about you sideburns, you want some of this milk? (full quote)
  Leg. (full quote)
  accually, this shirt belongs to frank (full quote)
  billy: (when he's drunk chasing the peguin) Watch out butler!! Your a quick one! (full quote)
  Billy: Veronica Vaughn, so hot, what to touch the heinie. (full quote)
  billy: Actually, I stole this shirt from Frank. (lifts the shirt to show Frank's name on it with permanent marker) billy's Dad: God damnit billy! Are you some kind of moron! (full quote)
  STOP LOOKING AT ME SWAN!!!! (full quote)
  1): You want some of this milk, sideburns? 2): I'd rather have a beer... (full quote)
  That Victoria Vaughn is one nice piece of ayss... (full quote)
  That looks like a nice piece of shit... (full quote)
  1): Donkey Kong sucks. 2): Know what? YOU SUCK! (full quote)
  1.hey you want some of this milk? 2.uh..that milk belongs to room 112 1.They dont gots to know about it. This milk could be our milk. 2.no milk will ever be our milk. (full quote)
  shampoo is better i go on first and clean the hair. No conditioner is better i keep the hait silky and smooth. Oh really fool. Really.**hit the bottles together** STOP LOOKING AT ME SWAM!! (full quote)
  Back to school back to school to prove to dad that i'm not a fool i've got my lunch pack packed my boots tighed tight i hope i dont get in a fight ooohhh back to school back to school back to school... (full quote)
  big can of shut the hell up (full quote)
  --if you stay home from school you can help me shave my aaaarmpits--GROSS!!...I'll go to school! (full quote)
  stop looking at me swan (full quote)
  I drew the duck blue because I've never seen a blue duck before. And to be honest with you, I wanted to see a blue duck. (full quote)
  That Veronica Vonn is one piece of ace. (full quote)
  You got a pet. You got a responcibility. If your dog is lost you dont look for an hour and call it quits. You get ur ass out there and you find that fucking dog. (full quote)
  We are so lucky to have Principal Anderson as a substitute today,Now we have the privelage of staring at that tub of lard all day long, If I were him I'd walk my fat ass right into oncoming traffic. (full quote)
  Old lady: what are horseshoes? what do horseshoes do? Are there any horsesocks? Is anybody listening to me? (full quote)
  Everybody pees their pants. (full quote)
  Wanna feed that donkey some beer? Get it all messed up? Uhhh... maybe later. Okay. I'll go put some beer in a bucket. (full quote)
  noo..conditioner is betta it makes your hail silky and smoooth (full quote)
  You aren't cool unless you pee in your pants! (full quote)
  but ya see the puppy was now a dog and the industry my friends that was a revolution (full quote)
  Hey where's my snack pack? Your not getting a snack pack your getting a banana. I dont want a banana I wanna snack pack! I'll be your snack pack (full quote)
  jack-wanna give that donkey some beer...get it all messed up? billy-maybe later pal. jack-ok ill go get some beer,in a bucket. (full quote)
  So sorry to INTERUUUUPT! (full quote)
  Eric's pregnant! Congratulations dippy! Oooh he's kicking! He's going to be a soccer player! He is! (full quote)
  Thank-you for beating the shit out of me (full quote)
  Thank-you for beating the shit out of me (full quote)
  Maid- billy get up for school. Billy-no school. want to stay home. Maid-wanna stay home and help shave my arm pits? Billy-....i'll go to school (full quote)
  T-T-T-TODAY JUNIOUR!! (full quote)
  Veronica singing: Billy, sweet Billy BOy, I knew you would come back. No one can stop you if you try, don't I have a nice rack? (full quote)
  It's too damn hot for a penguin to be just walkin around! (full quote)
  Now your all in big big trouble! (full quote)
  Quiz Guy:Mr. Madison, what you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul. (full quote)
  Actually, i stole this shirt from frank (full quote)
  Bryan Binno is honestly the gayest kid ALIVE!!! HE IS SUCH A FAG! HAHAHAHHAHA! (full quote)
  Kid-Mom, this is billy, i heard he was retarted or something. (full quote)
  He called the shit poo! (full quote)
  back to school back to school to prove to daddy that im not a fool, got my lunch paked up my shoes tied tight i hope i dont get in a fight, back to school back to school back,to,school (full quote)
  I thought I was your Snack Pack! (full quote)
  No milk will ever be our milk... (full quote)
  miss veronica is so hot, want to touch the heiny (full quote)
  Sometimes I feel like an idiot, but I am an idiot, so it kinda works out. (full quote)
  Guy: (something in spanish) Billy: Slow down... Guy: (Slows down a bit) Billy: Ah. (full quote)
  you ain't cool, unless you pee your pants. peeing your pants is the coolest (full quote)
  It's poop again Don't put it out with your boots Ted Don't tell me my business devil woman (full quote)
  GO ON WITH THE CHLORAFILL! (full quote)
  1)Hey you can have the mucus queen over their 2)Thanks!! (full quote)
  Oh billy, passed the third grade oh what a wonderful day (full quote)
  I have no response for that (full quote)
  1) There's something I was supposed to do today. 2) Drink five dacqueries? 3)No he remembered to do that haha 1)why did I drink so much? Now I can't remember. Gasp! Nudy Magazine Day!!! (full quote)
  (singing) O Back to school, back to school, to proove to Dad that I'm not a fool. I got my lunch packed up, my boots tied tight, I hope I don't get in a fight! O back to school, back to school, back...to...school. (Bus full of screaming kids speeds by) (full quote)
  1) You remember that spelling be you won in the third grade? 2) Yeah what about it? 1)Rock R-O-C 2)yeah so? 1) R-O-C-K!!! 2)oh the K is silent! (full quote)
  Shampoo is better. I go on first and clean the hair. No conditioner is better. I leave the hair silky and smooth. Oh really fool? really. (bangs the bottles together and drops them in the water. turns to swan figure) Stop looking at me Swan! (full quote)
  well, i drew the duck blue because i've never seen a blue duck, and to be honest with ya, i wanted to see one (full quote)
  Fat Kid:Look everyone Billy peed his pants... Other Kid:Hey Ernie did too Billy:your not the coolest unless you pee your pants!! Old Lady:If peeing your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis. (full quote)
  Hey, wanna go feed that donkey some beer? (full quote)
  69...ahaha (full quote)
  Back to school back to school to prove to dadda I'm not a fool I got my boots tied tight my lunch backed up I hope I don't get in a fight oh back to school back to school. (full quote)
  Is that it daddy? Did the penguin tell you to do this? (full quote)
  It's a flaming bag a shiettt (full quote)
  clorophil more like boraphil (full quote)
  Who would u rather bone? Meg Ryan or Jack Nicholson? (full quote)
  Back to school, Back to school to prove to my Dad im not a fool, Ihave my lunch packed all tight, I hope Idon't get into a fight. (full quote)
  Kid 1: Miss Vaughn, Miss Vaughn, someone stole our lunches. Miss Vaughn: Thats odd who would steal thirty sack lunches. Old Lady: Ill tell you who did it, it was that damn sasquatch. (full quote)
  Hey kids its me I guess you fought I was dead I just fell down and broke my leg and got a hemorage in my head haha (full quote)
13284 1. Here's a nice piece of shit!(scoops up dog poo into bag) 2. Ohmigosh, Old Man Clemens hates shit! 1. He's gonna SHIT when he realizes it's SHIT! Who's got the lighter! 3. Light it! (bag is lit and doorbell is rung and the group hide behind a bush) 4(opening door before noticing) Whaddaya want? Geez Harper, it's one of those flaming bags again! 5. (in house) Don't put it out with your boots, Ted! 4. Don't tell me my business, devil woman! (stomps out bag before taking off shoe and noticing smell) Ugghh, poop again! 1. He called the shit, poop!(laughter) 4. I'll get you damn kids for this, you're all gonna DIE! (laughter continues) (full quote)
princesstigereyes O'Doyle rules!!! (full quote)
24366 THat's an excellent blue duck. (full quote)
24366 1) Don't put it out with your boots, Ted! 2) Don't tell me my business, devil woman! Call the fire department, this ones outta control! (full quote)
24618 Hello Mr.Penguin... (full quote)
26259 Suntan Lotion is good for me, You protect me, tee hee hee! uh-duba-duba. The sun tries to burn me, but you wont let it! Will ya? Ultraviolet rays- BAD! Lotion-good! ::pfft pfft pfft:: Smiley! (full quote)
Ash BILLY!! I swear to God, I'm sick, I can't go to school. Well, if you're gonna stay home from school, you can help me shave my ARMPITS! HEHEHE! Oh my GOD, I'll go to school. (full quote)
27898 billy-couch...C-O-R...ARE you going to the mall afterschool? teacher-no billy im not!go on! billy-C-O-U-C-H? teacher-correct! billy-I AM THE SMARTEST MAN ALIVE! (full quote)
30083 1. The mucus queen...is yours! 2. THANKS!! (full quote)
30099 Eric's having a baby...ohhh feel it kick...he's gonna be a soccer playa...yes he is (full quote)
30099 (doorbell rings) 1: It's one of those flaming bags again 2: dont put it out with your boots ted 1: Dont tell me my businees devil woman 1: call the fire dept. this ones outta control (stomps bag)...its poop 3: He called the shit poop (full quote)
30099 1: now that we're all alone what do u wanna do 2: I can think of three things, one would involve a buffalo live or stuffed preferably stuffed for safety reasons, two would bring back that buffalo and some ice cubes, three would switch out the buffalo with a 9 iron...(Karl walks in) 3: Billy 2: Karl, so nice to see you! (full quote)
35198 (1) Nice talking to you billy (2) Tellahoohoo, Shabbadoo, Kayloooo!!!! (full quote)
37431 Shampoo is better. I go on first and clean de hair. Conditionar is better. I leave de hair silky and smooth. Oh really fool? Really......Stop lookin' at me shwan. (full quote)
37655 Billy Madison: No I will not make out with you. Did ya hear that? this girl wants to make out with me in the middle of class. You got Chlorophyll Man up there talking about God knows what and all she can talk about is making out with me. I'm here to learn, everybody, not to make out with you. Go on with the chlorophyll. (full quote)
40504 shampoo is better i goes on first and clean the hair...conditioner is better i leave the hair silky and smooth! (full quote)
42388 Whoa, whoa, whoa Miss Lippy. The part of the story I dont like is that the little boy gave up looking for Happy after an hour. That little boy's gotta think, youve got a PET youve got a RESPONSIBILITY. WHen your dog gets lost, you dont look for an hour and call it quits, you get your ass out there and you find that fucking dog! (full quote)
43571 1 So, who would you rather bone...Meg Ryan or Jack Nicholson? 2 Jack Nicholson now...or 1974? 1 Doesn't Matter...'74... 2 Meg Ryan... (full quote)
43762 Ohhhhh, so sorry to interuuuupt! (full quote)
44862 VERONICA (singing): My Billy, sweet Billy boy, I knew you would come back. No one can stop you if you try, don't I have a nice rack? (Billy nods his head) Billy (still singing): Veronica I thank you, for beating the shit out of me, I see things so clearly now, I choose my destiny. (full quote)
48760 Shampoo is better, I go on first and clean the hair...NO conditioner is better I leave the hair silky and smooth. Oh really fool!! Really...Pause...STOP LOOKING AT ME SWAN!!!!! (full quote)
48760 Mr. Madison, what you just said was the most insanely idiotic thing I have ever heard. At no point during your rambling incoherent repsonse were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in here is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul...Billy, A simple no would have been just fine but ah thank you! (full quote)
bball3baller1111 shampoo: Shampoo is better. I go on first and clean the hair. conditioner: conditioner is better, i leave the hair silky and smooth. shampoo: o really fool conditioner: really shampoo: really billy hits them together. billy turns. billy: Stop looking at me swan. (full quote)
bball3baller1111 Billy: OOOOOOOOWWWW!! your tearin my ear off! Veronica: Making fun of a little kid for trying to read. Are you pshyco? Do you not have a soul? Billy: im sorry i can't hear you, I have been physically abused in the ear. Veronica: don't think that for one second that you can jus slide right through this class. Either you straighten up or I will fail you. end of discussion. Billy: i see your lips moving but I can't make out the words. I'm DEAF!!!....... OOOHHH Veronica Vaughn, SOOOOOOOOOO hott. want to touch the hiny. AROOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (full quote)
smallball i had a bad case of loser denial myself. until the lacrosse team shoved a parking cone up my ass. (full quote)