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Mystery, Alaska - 1999 Movie Quotes


Posted ByQuote
bigcat58 She's much fatter naked. (full quote)
bigcat58 1) Stevie, how many fingers have I got? 2) I'm a premature ejaculator. (full quote)
bigcat58 Hey, listen buddy, do you know where a guy can get a rub and a tug around here? (full quote)
bigcat58 1) He okay? 2) No, I'm not okay! Do I look like I'm okay?!?! The fucker shot me! what the fuck ass fuck of a bum fuck shithole town is this?!?! (full quote)
  I have a toy pony. It takes big shits. (full quote)
  Ahhh...a zamboni! I'm getting wet just thinking about it (full quote)
5267 She's riding me like a wet walrus. (full quote)
5267 I'm a premature ejaculator. (full quote)
6347 Mama Walrus going thwap thwap thwap? (full quote)
6347 There's more to the game than speed. (full quote)
7523 I have a toy pony. He takes big shits. (full quote)
7523 I fornicate and play hockey cause they're the two most fun things to do in cold weather. (full quote)
7539 1.)women don't like to be refered to as fat mammals, Skank. 2.)I'd have never have said it to her face. (full quote)
7539 Two things we've always had in Mystery is our dignity and our illusions. I suggest we cling to both. (full quote)
  My nostrils just froze. (full quote)
  1) Stevie wouldn't sleep with me! 2)Oh...so you two have already had....relations? 1)No, he came in the condom. (full quote)
CarmiCrowe I'm a premature ejaculator! (full quote)
  I have a toy pony. He takes big shits. (full quote)
10537 I have a toy pony. He takes big shits. (full quote)
  1. Dear Abby. All the words are crossed out. 2. Not the important ones. (full quote)
  Mother Walrus going thwap thwap? (full quote)
  Well, please excuse me your honor but I'm fat. (full quote)
  For God sakes!! (full quote)
12573 You know any place where a man can get a rub and a tug here? (full quote)
22841 [ Car won't start, man gets out of car ] Joey: F~~~ ME! Man: Hey, what'd you say? [ Picks up kid, to older kid ] You teach him that? Kid: He heard it in the locker room, Dad. Man: From who? Kid: EVERYONE! You know what it's like in there. (full quote)
  i play hockey and fornicate, because those are the two most fun things to do when it's cold (full quote)
  forgive me your honor, i'm fat (full quote)
  I play hockey and fournicate, cause there the two most fun things to do in cold weather (full quote)
10929 This is hockey, OK? It's not rocket surgery. (full quote)
22841 [Car won't start, John gets out of car.] Joey: F### ME! John: Hey, what'd you say? [To other kid.] John: You teach him that? Older kid: He heard it in the locker room, dad. John: From who? Older kid: Everyone. You know what it's like in there. (full quote)
Marvin Acme #1-Connor? #2-I’m ready John. #1-Birdie you with us? #3-Yep. #1-good cause the Rangers are starting to breathe through their mouths. Their strides are getting shorter. Do not give these guys too much respect! THEY DIDN’T PULL THE DOG SLED DID THEY? THEY DIDN’T SKATE THE RIVER! (full quote)
Marvin Acme I play hockey and I fornicate, 'cause those are the two most fun things to do in cold weather. (full quote)
Marvin Acme I’m not beaten. I’M NOT BEATEN! We’re in this game! Anybody here tired? ANYBODY HERE @#$% TIRED? (full quote)
6948 Excuse me your honor, I'm fat. (full quote)
crowecat John Biebe: You okay? Mr. Walsh: No, I'm not okay! Do I look okay? The fucker shot me! What the fuck-ass fuck of a bum-fuck shithole town is this? I make a business call. I give him my card. And the hick-ass fucker shoots my foot off! Cock-fucking shit! (full quote)
crowecat Sarah Heinz: Mother walrus going Thwap, thwap, thwap? Matt Skank Marden: What?! Sarah Heinz: You wanna hear a Thwap? Sheriff John Biebe: women don't like being referred to as fat mammals, Skank. Matt 'Skank' Marden: I never would've said that to her face. (full quote)
crowecat This is hockey, okay? It's not rocket surgery. If you don't play this game with a lot of heart and a big bag of knuckles, you don't got dinky-doo. (full quote)
  You need to rub your hands on a nice warm yule-tied log. (full quote)
  what the fuck ass fuck of a bumfuck shit hole town is this? (full quote)
  He plays to play. He skates to skate. He don't make a million bucks a year! He loves the games of hockey. (full quote)
  I have a toy pony, he takes big shits. (full quote)
10929 This is hockey, okay? It's not rocket surgery. (full quote)
Marvin Acme Uh, th...Thank you for seeing me, Mister...Little Richard. (full quote)
Marvin Acme Uh, th...Thank you for seeing me, Mister...Little Richard. (full quote)
Marvin Acme #1- I'm cold. #2- Yes. Which makes what I'm about to ask... seem like a monumental request. (full quote)
Marvin Acme Uh, th...Thank you for seeing me, Mister...Little Richard. (full quote)
Marvin Acme Uh, Thank you for seeing me, Mister... Little Richard. (full quote)
Marvin Acme Uh, th...Thank you for seeing me, Mister...Little Richard. (full quote)
Marvin Acme #1- Price World's not gonna come, Mom. We're not big enough, for God's sakes. #2- Well they've been sniffin'. (full quote)
38573 you aint got dinky-doo... (full quote)
47880 John: women don't like being referred to as fat mammals, Skank. Skank: I never would've said that to her face. (full quote)
47880 Don't you ever wish you lived in a town that had a museum, or someplace where brothers and sisters were off limits to each other sexually? (full quote)