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How to Kill Your Neighbor's Dog - 2000 Movie Quotes

Posted ByQuote
  Hollywood doesn't want screenwriters so much as secretaries with a flair for dialogue. (full quote)
  1) Hey, I came out here to smoke a cigarette, not make new friends. 2) Oh so you have old friends, do you? (full quote)
  1) There's nothing an erection hates more than a purpose. 2) And laughter. (full quote)
  Peter: (after a prostate exam) Now I know what a Muppet feels like. (full quote)
  (Peter is smoking) Melanie McGowan: You know, you're going to have to cut that out when the baby comes. Peter McGowan: what? Are you expecting it tonight? (full quote)
  Peter McGowan: Hollywood doesn't want writers, so much as secretaries with a flare for dialogue. If you want to be happy in Hollywood, be a cinematographer. Nobody knows what you're doing, so they can't screw with you. (full quote)
  Peter McGowen: ...but maybe that's everything in writing--a catchy title. Debra Salhany: So is that why you decided to call your first novel How to Kill your Neighbor's Dog? Peter McGowen: Oh, that isn't mere affectation. That's a practical guidebook full of juicy bits on suburban terrorism. Debra Salhany: ...but, uh, what if somebody reads this and goes out and kills their neighbor's dog? Peter McGowen: Oh, well, whaddya gonna do? (full quote)
  (A prostate exam)Peter: OH JESUS! OH, CHRIST HELP! Docter: How much came out? Peter: Came out?! Docter: From your penis, how much came out? Peter: (Looks down) GOD, YOU MADE ME EJACULATE, YOU BASTARD!!! (full quote)
  Peter: (sees his stalker/imposter) Peter McGowan? False Peter: Yes? Peter: You fucker, I'm Peter McGowan! (full quote)
10929 Hollywood doesn't want writers. (full quote)
10929 If you want to be happy in Hollywood, be a cinematographer. Nobody knows what you're doing so they can't screw with you. (full quote)
  Edna: You look just like my son-in-law. Peter: I am your son-in-law, Edna. Edna: He was much better looking, though. (full quote)
  Peter: (to his doctor) So, is the Surgeon General your leader? (full quote)