| Posted By | Quote |
| 9510 |
i'll kiss every god damm guy in the place i've no problem with my sexuality
(full quote)
|
| 7869 |
I can taste the bubbles!
(full quote)
|
| 7869 |
Jim, can't you leave your shirt on? your scaring the chicks away.
(full quote)
|
| 7869 |
Two possible lesbians in their bra and panties.
(full quote)
|
| 7869 |
HOT DOGS! Here we come!
(full quote)
|
| 7869 |
I'm like Cupid.
(full quote)
|
| 7869 |
Party hardy!
(full quote)
|
| 7869 |
Come on now baby!
(full quote)
|
| |
ok..you both jack him off! alright guys-i'll take one for the team!
(full quote)
|
| 9767 |
Why don't you get yourself a spoon,
so you can eat my ass.
(full quote)
|
| 9767 |
Why don't you get yourself a spoon,
so you can eat my ass....
(full quote)
|
| |
u suck retard
(full quote)
|
| 3225 |
1) You suck, retard 2) I'm not a retard. I'm a very special boy
(full quote)
|
| 3225 |
I am a band geek. I just never joined the band
(full quote)
|
| 3225 |
We are awfully proud of you, son...don't forget your penis cream
(full quote)
|
| 3225 |
Nadia is going to expect fillet mignion and all I'm going to be able to give her is rump roast
(full quote)
|
| 3225 |
Fuck me, Geek!
(full quote)
|
| 3225 |
I don't care if you gave me ten orgasms in a row, because you smell really really bad...NO I smell really really bad...
(full quote)
|
| |
I got a DILDO
(full quote)
|
| |
You go get your geek! While I look for mine...
(full quote)
|
| |
The Girl: You are so sweet. He`s ... different.
Michelle: He`s my bitch.
(full quote)
|
| |
Guys! Check this out! Lesbians, lesbians live here!
(full quote)
|
| |
Guys, check this out! Lesbians, lesbians live here!
(full quote)
|
| |
i got peed on
(full quote)
|
| |
i got peed on
(full quote)
|
| |
he's my bitch!
(full quote)
|
| |
you've gotta preheat the oven before you stick in the turkey!
(full quote)
|
| |
I had sex with many women, but none of them compare to Stifler's mom.
(full quote)
|
| 11280 |
Stiffler's brother: Fuckers Fuckers Fuckers. How you doing boys
(full quote)
|
| 11280 |
Jim: Hello? Boys control? I got a problem. i kinda glued myself to ummmm.....myself
(full quote)
|
| |
girl:who is that? cop: this is uh, john smith. im turning off the radio now (keeps listening).
(full quote)
|
| |
Shake this!
(full quote)
|
| 11280 |
[phone rings](Stiffler picks up) Stiffler: Stiffler's palace of love....straight love
(full quote)
|
| 11280 |
Stiffler: I can taste the bubbles...well no i can't.How did u get it so warm?
(full quote)
|
| 11774 |
dude, where's the fuckin' pussy
(full quote)
|
| 11774 |
i'm in a lesbien stronghold!
(full quote)
|
| 11774 |
DIL-DO! DIL-DO! DIL-DO!
(full quote)
|
| 11774 |
Grab his ass son, you'll like it.
(full quote)
|
| 11774 |
where's all the fucking females?
(full quote)
|
| 7869 |
I have an 11 inch penis...AROUND!
(full quote)
|
| 7869 |
Keep it real homies!
(full quote)
|
| 7869 |
MY NAME IS PETEY! AND I HAVE GIGANTIC ballS!
(full quote)
|
| 7869 |
HOLY POTATOES!
(full quote)
|
| |
Stifler: So Jessica, How many chicks did you bag at college? Jessica: Wouldn't you like to know... Stifler: FUCK YEAH I WOULD!
(full quote)
|
| |
stiffler to oz- you fuckin pussy
(full quote)
|
| |
Keep it real hommies
(full quote)
|
| |
I didn't get your daughters name but hopefully my son did
(full quote)
|
| |
Oh you mean that flutie tooting band geek who made me her BITCH and ditched me after prom
(full quote)
|
| |
The people demand rubber dicks
(full quote)
|
| |
whole shit I found a dildo.... Rubber dick, Rubber dick, Rubber dick
(full quote)
|
| |
Hey there he is. How are the twig and giggle berries? Great my dick looks like a paint by number. You have the only dick that needs and instruction manual.
(full quote)
|
| |
Eat shit!!
(full quote)
|
| 12243 |
I got peed on.
(full quote)
|
| 12261 |
looks like someone gained a freshman 15. heres maybe this will help.
(full quote)
|
| trip |
Holy shit dude, if I didn't have to hold my dick because I have to piss so bad, I would shake your hand.
(full quote)
|
| 12653 |
I'm not retarded, I'm a very special boy! -bum bum BUM!-
(full quote)
|
| |
wipe my ass and lick my balls
(full quote)
|
| |
fuck you
(full quote)
|
| 12665 |
That's a jizz free ficus.
(full quote)
|
| |
Stifler's house of loooove... uh straight love.
(full quote)
|
| 12721 |
It's like you know all our stories
Oh was that a question?
I dunno, do you wanna answer anyway?
(full quote)
|
| 12721 |
I get nasty when i'm horny
(full quote)
|
| 12721 |
I got gigantic balls
(full quote)
|
| 12721 |
How's this for a band camp story
(full quote)
|
| 12721 |
Tantric? what the fuck is tantric?
(full quote)
|
| 12721 |
Stay away from that ficus. that's a jizz free ficus
(full quote)
|
| 12721 |
Looks like someone gained the freshman 15. here this will help
(full quote)
|
| 12721 |
Cmon Sherman, I'm really glad to see you
Well alright.
You stupid fuck
(full quote)
|
| 12721 |
So Jessica how many chicks did you sleep with this year?
Wouldn't you like to know
Fuck yea i would
(full quote)
|
| 12721 |
Rule of 3. It's an exact science. As consistent as gravity
(full quote)
|
| 12721 |
This is my first time.......since my first time so technically this is my second time
(full quote)
|
| 12717 |
It's piss poor to be this late. I'm angry, you can tell by the tone of my voice how angry I am. I'm pissed OFF...is what I am.
(full quote)
|
| |
I have an 11 inch penis.....Around.....Think about it.
(full quote)
|
| 12908 |
like, this one time at band camp...
(full quote)
|
| |
Howdy, Howdy, How the fuck is everyone!
(full quote)
|
| 12315 |
Howdy, Howdy, How the fuck is everyone!?
(full quote)
|
| 13142 |
I have an 11 inch penis.....around. Think about it?
(full quote)
|
| 13142 |
Finch I don't want to hear about you and your boyfriends...go jerk off. Unessery
(full quote)
|
| 13142 |
Dildo! Dildo!
(full quote)
|
| |
HOWDY HOWDY FUCKING PARTNERS
(full quote)
|
| 8487 |
1) Stifler, get off!!! 2) (laughing) I am getting off!
(full quote)
|
| 8487 |
And one time, at band camp.........
(full quote)
|
| |
Finch, Fist yourself
(full quote)
|
| 12243 |
Keep it real homies.
(full quote)
|
| 13590 |
Have you seen my calarinet? I shoved it in your box!
(full quote)
|
| 13590 |
You're making me wet. really? no
(full quote)
|
| 13513 |
I, uh, just glued my self to... my-y-self
(full quote)
|
| 13682 |
Who was that? Just someone looking for the lake. what a dumbass! The lake's right there!! ha ha!
(full quote)
|
| 13964 |
Sherman : I'm.....the Shermanator...a sophisticated sex robot sent back in time to change the future for one lucky lady. Nadia : I am lucky lady? Sherman : Thats right Nadia, you have been targeted for Shermination. Come with me if you want to live ! (They go upstairs) Nadia : Fuck Me Geek !!!!!
(full quote)
|
| 14443 |
Stifler:Sherman hows it goin!? Sherman: Ok Stifler take your shot, haha. Stifler: No, c'mon man i'm really happy to see you.(Stifler offers him a high five) Sherman: AAllright(sherman tries to give stifler a high five) Stifler:You stupid fuck!!(as he pulls his arm away from sherman.)
(full quote)
|
| 14445 |
Nadia, I am a band geek, I just never joined the band.
(full quote)
|
| 15009 |
Tantra? what the fuuck is tantra?
(full quote)
|
| |
Stifler : Ozzy I'm happy for ya, at least you've seen a nice bod while Heather's off suckin' dick.
Oz : Sifler keep your fantasies to yourself.
Stifler : Dude, use your fuckin' brain. 'Oh I'm American college chick, la-la-la, your European cultural shit is so charming. Oh hey, hot Spanish guy, love your accent....love your ding-dong.' I'm tellin' ya man, right now there's a dick in your girlfriends mouth.
(full quote)
|
| |
yeah so this girl called me last night asking for my phone number
(full quote)
|
| |
oh no what have i done with johnny west!!!
(full quote)
|
| |
I have an 11 inch penis.....AROUND!!!
(full quote)
|
| 8217 |
Dude,I found a dildo!!!
|
| 15699 |
1)AHHHH!!!!!! Jim!!!! 2) OH MY GOD DAD GET OUT!!!!! 1)oh, hello, i'm uh, i'm jim' dad. i didn't get your daughter's name but hopefully my son did.
(full quote)
|
| |
FUCKERS FUCKERS FUCKERS
(full quote)
|
| |
Jim: Hello? poison control? I got a problem. i kinda glued myself to ummmm.....myself
(full quote)
|
| |
Go fist yourself
(full quote)
|
| |
Jim: Hello? Poison Control? I have a problem. I glued myself to ... myself.
(full quote)
|
| 16568 |
Hiya F*?kface
(full quote)
|
| |
spending your life playing in the band doesnt exactly give you that ultra cool hipster image
(full quote)
|
| |
I just shoved a trumpet up your ass. Aren't instruments fun?
(full quote)
|
| |
My penis is 11 inches around! Think about it!
(full quote)
|
| |
Lesbian Artifacts!
(full quote)
|
| |
Jim - What...What are you doing??? Michelle - I just shoved a trumpet in your ass. Aren't instruments fun?!?
(full quote)
|
| |
Don't Forget Ur Penis cream
(full quote)
|
| |
dude, am I gonna have a hangover tomorrow...cause I want one.
(full quote)
|
| 11288 |
1)are you a relative sir?
2)f*ck no this sh*t is just too good to miss!
(full quote)
|
| |
Holy potatoes!
(full quote)
|
| |
I'M IN A LESBIAN STRONGHOLD.
(full quote)
|
| |
GIRL#1:WHERE'S MY CLARINET?GIRL#2:I JUST SHOVED IN your BOX.JIM:OH I'M A BAD MAN,A BAD MAN.
(full quote)
|
| |
STIFLER:TELL ME I HAVE A BIG DICK LIKE STIFLER.OZ:GET OFF.STIFLER:I ****AM****GETTING OFF,JUST listENING TO YOU TWO.
(full quote)
|
| |
I DIDN'T GET HER NAME,BUT I'M SURE MY SON DID.
(full quote)
|
| |
I'M HERE FOR THE PUSSY.JIM:TAKE A number.
(full quote)
|
| |
WE JUST DID SOMETHING TOGETHER.VERY TOGETHER.
(full quote)
|
| |
WANNA play SOME ASSHOLE?
(full quote)
|
| |
GIRL:NO,YOU KISS HIM.STIFLER:DUDE,NO.
(full quote)
|
| |
STIFLER:JIM,YOU'RE A LOUSY KISSER.JIM:WAIT,THAT'S NOT FAIR.I WASN'T TRYING.WAIT,YOU WERE TRYING?
(full quote)
|
| 8217 |
(OZZY):Here's a new idea for ya Stifler, You find a girl.....you two become best friends and you don't bother counting how many times you have sex with each other....you just laugh at the people that do count.(Stifler): Here's a new idea for you, I'll get you a spoon so you can eat my ass.
|
| 8217 |
I'm not retarded, I'm a very special boy.
|
| |
And that includes fucking me in the Ass!
(full quote)
|
| 14526 |
You know Jim, even though your friends may call you Jimbo, or Jimbodeeni, your mother and I still remember where James Emanuel Lovenstein came from.
Thanks dad.
OH, And don't forget your penis cream.
(full quote)
|
| |
This was a good christmas preasent you bought the kids the lezbians: Ohh my nipples are so hard
(full quote)
|
| |
1. Are you family?
2. Fuck no but this is too good to miss
(full quote)
|
| |
wipe my ass and lick my balls !
(full quote)
|
| |
jim:wot r u doin?stiffler:im looking 4 other lesbian artefacts
(full quote)
|
| 20970 |
and there was this one time, at band camp...
(full quote)
|
| |
Big rubber dick for everyone!
(full quote)
|
| |
Big blue rubber dicks for EVERYONE!!
(full quote)
|
| |
I have an 11 inch penis....around
(full quote)
|
| |
I have an 11 inch penis..around
(full quote)
|
| 22031 |
I gotta keep this party going. Im taking one for the team.
(full quote)
|
| 22384 |
Take me out to the pasture and shoot me, my sexual life is past it's peek.
(full quote)
|
| Smurf_511 |
Yeah, I sorta glued myself to.... myself. No, no, no don't send anyone over. Are there any household items that can work....... paint thinner.
(full quote)
|
| 22776 |
what the fuck is tantric?>
(full quote)
|
| |
Don't call me Steven!
(full quote)
|
| |
thats fucking discusting i'm gonna throw up
(full quote)
|
| |
Jim: I super-glued myself to, uh,... myself.
(full quote)
|
| |
RUBBER DICKS FOR EVERYONE...DIL-DO DIL-DO DIL-DO!!!
(full quote)
|
| |
Awww yeah The Stiflermeister is coming back to Granharbor! Deck the halls, Bye bye Greatfalls, wipe my ass and lick my balls and it's Stifler time baby! Whoooooo Hoooooooo
(full quote)
|
| 25438 |
Tantric? what the fuck is tantric?
(full quote)
|
| |
Yes, the force is strong in that one.
(full quote)
|
| |
No matter what, times change and things are different. Th problem is, I don't want them to be.
(full quote)
|
| 26923 |
I'm touching his ass, i'm touching his ass, i'm touching his ass....
(full quote)
|
| princesstigereyes |
I just got peed on!
(full quote)
|
| princesstigereyes |
My name is Petey.....and I have gigantic balls!!!
(full quote)
|
| |
oz: here a new idea for u stifler, u find a nice girl, u two become best friends and you dont count the number of times u have sex with her u just laough at the popl who do count
stifler: heres a new idea for u, ill get u a spoon so u can eat my ass
(full quote)
|
| |
little kid: What's your position??
Stifler: I'm touching his ass I'm touching his ass I'm touching his ass
(full quote)
|
| 25630 |
Jim! Can't you keep your shirt on? You're scaring the chicks away!
(full quote)
|
| 25630 |
Well, evidently you two made quite the handsome couple on the internet... Oh, I didn't see it. It, uh, was brought up at a P.T.A. meeting.
(full quote)
|
| |
Is that a dress, is that a fucking dress?
(full quote)
|
| 4384 |
You're the only guy I know whose dick needs an instruction manual.
(full quote)
|
| |
1) it's just friendly goodbye sex 2) technically we havent had friendly hello sex
(full quote)
|
| |
Fuckers, Fuckers, Fuckers, what's going on boys? what the hell you doing here. The pussy, what else. Take a number
(full quote)
|
| |
We will make out if one of you gives a guy head? What guys I am taking one for the team.
(full quote)
|
| |
Stifler: hey heather baby, why don't you tell my dick's as big as stifler's!
(full quote)
|
| |
Stifler:Big Blue Dicks for Everyone.dil..do...dil.do../dil.do
Jim:where'd you find that?
Stifler:Finch's ass
(full quote)
|
| |
I have no future with Stifler's mom...other than a very warped, kinky one
(full quote)
|
| |
Finch:Tantra teaches you to hold an orgasm, filling to the brim, until the ultimate moment when you release it upon the world
Stifler:That's gross
(full quote)
|
| 30929 |
I am not retarded - I am a very special boy!
(full quote)
|
| |
Howdy Howdy Fucking Partners!
(full quote)
|
| |
Nadia I am a band geek, I just never joined the band.
(full quote)
|
| |
1)And this one time...at..here....this visitor came, and we aren't supposed to have visitors 2) yea yea, i know, and then a bear came.
(full quote)
|
| |
Stiflers little brother... what the hell are you doing here? (LIL Bro) The pussy man, the pussy.
(full quote)
|
| |
Stifer's Brother: Wanna Fuck?
(full quote)
|
| |
Oh SHIT Dude I Found a DILDO!!!
(full quote)
|
| |
1)Dude What are you doing??? 2)I'm looking for more lesbian artifacts!!
(full quote)
|
| |
(whispering) They're getting naked!
(full quote)
|
| |
I just wanted proof that you were really lesbians!
(full quote)
|
| |
Sounds like your little friends outside wanna play too!!
(full quote)
|
| |
1) I know! You feel his ass first! 2)Excuse Me?
(full quote)
|
| |
1) RED LEADER WHAT'S your POSITION! 2)I'm touching his ass! I'm touching his ass I'm touching his ass!! 1) MOMMY!!
(full quote)
|
| |
1) AAHH That didn't even count!, That's how you kiss your mother 2)Don't you say anything!
(full quote)
|
| |
PUT THAT THING AWAY STIFFLER!!!
(full quote)
|
| |
And that includes fucking me up the ass!!
(full quote)
|
| |
Wait a second! Who the fuck was in that car!
(full quote)
|
| |
Holy shit, dude, I found a dildo! Big, blue rubber dicks for everyone! The people demand rubber dicks! Dildo, dildo...
(full quote)
|
| |
Stiflers Brother: thats a really nice top, you have beautiful eyes Girl: thanks Stiflers Brother: wanna fuck?
(full quote)
|
| |
Bye Bye great falls deck the halls wipe my ass and lick my balls its STIFMISTER time Baby! yeah!!!!
(full quote)
|
| |
Shut the fuck up or i will break down the door a pummel your ass!
(full quote)
|
| |
Touch me I bite
(full quote)
|
| |
Shut the fuck up before i break down the door and pummel your ass
(full quote)
|
| |
Just so there is no confucion...santa porn has brought us some heteral sexual entertainment.
(full quote)
|
| |
Vic, I'd much rather have you as a friend than not have you in my life at all.
(full quote)
|
| 33899 |
We're very proud of you, son. Don't forget your penis cream.
(full quote)
|
| 33899 |
Brilliant! You found Lesbians...
(full quote)
|
| 33899 |
I guess I've always been a band geek. I was just never in the band.
(full quote)
|
| |
It's time to boom boom with the bridesmaids
(full quote)
|
| |
oh hey,hot spanish guy, Love ur accent,Luuurve ur ding dong-Stifler
(full quote)
|
| |
AP3-im gonna hang out with my wang out,n im gonna rock 'em with my cock out
(full quote)
|
| |
(Lesbian on porn movie:) Is that a loofah or are you happy to see me? ...Loofah smuggling baby!
(full quote)
|
| |
ONE TIME AT BAND CAMP...
(full quote)
|
| |
Finch, stay the fuck away from that fichus, thats a jizz free fichus.
(full quote)
|
| |
Hey everybody listen up! NOVA'S BACK BABY! AND HES TAKIN THE LOCK OFF HIS COCK!
(full quote)
|
| |
stiffler: finch stay the fuck away from that vikis, thats a giz free vikis
(full quote)
|
| |
FUCK yeah LiL' DOGGY! -=stifler=-
(full quote)
|
| |
fuck
(full quote)
|
| |
My name is Petey and I have gigantic balls!
(full quote)
|
| |
Finch STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM THAT FICUS!!!...... that's a jizz free ficus
(full quote)
|
| 38645 |
Finch ..STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM THAT FICUS.....that's a jizz free ficus........
(full quote)
|
| 38324 |
This one time, uh here.
(full quote)
|
| |
howdy fucker partners
(full quote)
|
| |
This Summer Has Turned Out To Be GREAT!
(full quote)
|
| |
dont forget your penis cream
(full quote)
|
| |
Gentalmen, i belive this is a party!
(full quote)
|
| |
A super start to a super summer, welcome home guys...
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Jim's Dad: Don't forget your penis cream.
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Friend: You are so sweet. He is special.
Michelle: He's my bitch.
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Stifler: (while being urinated on, thinking it's champagne) I can taste the bubbles.
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Jim: I kind of super-glued myself to, uh.. myself.
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Jim: Ah, yes. You would be referring to the flute fetish band geek, who made me her bitch, and ditched me after prom.
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Jessica: If a guy tells you how many girls he's hooked up with, it's not even close to that. You take that number and divide it by three, then you get the real total.
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Jim: That's a lot of flutes.
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Jim: Ow that's cold. What is that?
Michelle: I just shoved a trumpet in your ass. Aren't instruments fun?
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Stifler: I'll get you a spoon so you can eat my ass.
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Michelle: No, you dingbat. You don't just go groping away. You gotta pre-heat the oven before you stick in the turkey.
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Jim: What are you doing?
Stifler: Looking for more lesbian artifacts.
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Sherman: I am the Sherminator, a sophisticated Sex-Robot sent through time to change the future for one lucky lady.
Nadia: And I am lucky lady?
Sherman: Nadia, you've been targeted for Shermination. Come with me if you want to live.
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Stifler: Jim, you're the only guy I know who's dick needs an instruction manual.
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Michelle: (at bandcamp) It was just like this one time.. here.
(full quote)
|
| 23438 |
Kid: Guests bring food. food attracts animals. This one time, a bear came. And then the bear had to be destroyed. Which means they shot it in the head with a rifle, and killed it, and it died.
Jim: Yeah, you must know Michelle.
(full quote)
|
| |
dude, i found a dildo hahaha. big blue rubber dicks for everyone! hahaha dildo,dildo,dildo. - stifler
(full quote)
|
| |
Since when does Stifler's mom drive a scooter?
(full quote)
|
| |
HA! what a dumbass, the lakes right there!
(full quote)
|
| |
i eat pussy for lunch
(full quote)
|
| 45511 |
Stifler's coming back to Grand Harbor. Deck the halls. Bye bye Great falls, whipe my ass and lick my balls, its Stifler time baby.
(full quote)
|
| |
just so theres no confusion, santa porn has brought us some heterosexual entertainment
(full quote)
|
| |
Stifler: Oh, yeah. The Stifmeister's coming back to Grand Harbor. Deck the halls. Bye-bye, Great falls. Wipe my ass and lick my balls. It's Stifler time, baby.
(full quote)
|
| 45511 |
Ladies, I am Steve Stifler. And I have an 11 inch penis...around. Think about it.
(full quote)
|
| 45511 |
Jim, can't you put your shirt on. You're scaring all the chicks away.
(full quote)
|
| 45511 |
Finch, I don't care what you do with your boyfriends. Go jerk off.
(full quote)
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| 45511 |
Stifler's palace of love, straight love.
(full quote)
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| 45511 |
1)They warn us about these situations in college. Now you may intoxicated, oh yeah. Are you sure you're willing to consend...2)Easy buster, don't start counting your chickens. 1)I'm just playing by the rules baby. 2)I make the rules. 1)That's a pretty good fucking rule.
(full quote)
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| 45511 |
Where's the fucking female?
(full quote)
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| 45511 |
Thank you Tall Oaks you're beautiful. My name is Petey, and I have gigantic balls!
(full quote)
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| 48858 |
Dude are you wearing a fucking dress?!?
(full quote)
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| 48858 |
Moring Jimbo, how the twig and berrys?
(full quote)
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| slowjay |
Seems like just yesterday me dad picked me up from college.
(full quote)
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