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Austin Powers: Goldmember - 2002 Movie Quotes


Posted ByQuote
  How `bout No! You crazy dutch bastard. (full quote)
  Who throws a cupcake? Honestly! (full quote)
25079 Isn't hat Magical. (full quote)
  Well Miss Normous, shall we shag now or shag later? (full quote)
20201 Everyone has a little clone in them. Would you like one in you? (full quote)
  yes i agree. preparation H does feel good on the whole. (full quote)
12953 How about NO you kinky dutch bastard? (full quote)
  Take the baseline out: No? You dont have to... BOUNCE WITH IT!! It's a hard knock life for us It's a hard knock (yea) life for us Steada treated we get tricked Steada Free says we get kicked Its a hard knock life I dont know how to be no crib on MTV. God only knows. Got my Mini-me in the GP see how it goes. Evil's all that I see... you ask me my name? D to the Rizzo, E to the Vizzo, I to the Lizzo, I'm a crazy (its a hard knock life) mother (beep) y'all knew that. Austin caught me in the first act that's all backwords, whats with that? So I'll make a prophesy from the dogs to the mini me. Gimme an escalade, 2 way bling-bling on Ebay. Domino, mother (beep) Its a hard knock life (yea) for us Its a hard knock life (stick that in your pipe and smoke it)for us. Steada treated (uh huh) we get tricked (this is for all my homies in Bruges) Steada kisses we get kicked It's a hard knock life (uh huh uh huh uh huh uh huh) for us Its a hard knock life for us Steada treated (ah, crystal, my moto, a couple of behotches, why not?) we get tricked Steada Free says we get kicked Its a hard knock life I gotta busta move, droppin busta groove feeling fine. Got an evil crew, Goldmember too. Lick my nine. Till then, I'll (beep) on my (beep) grand up the (beep) ill call and I'll splooge in your (beep) thats all! Fizzle my nizzle y'all. (its a hard knock life) This is a shout out to HOVA, God MC... You all know him, Thats Jay-Z!! I met him!! Well I saw him a restaurant once... It's a hard knock life! Stick that in your (beep)ing blunt and smoke it! Yeah, I said Blunt! (full quote)
  goldmember: bring his fasha out! Dr. Evil: his who? G: his fasha! E: fardor? G: noo fasha!! his dad ok bring him out E: ohh (full quote)
  ah-thank-ya (full quote)
  I've been on the Jared plan...I've lost 180 pounds. Though i've got a little extra skin now...Look at me, my neck looks like a vagina!!! (full quote)
  Dr.E:Are those frickin sharks with frickin laser beams attatched to their frickin heads? Scott: I love you Dad! Dr. Evil(straining): I love you son! (full quote)
  dr.e: boo-frickity-hoo (full quote)
25420 1.) No, no, you both come at me and then i'll take each of you down individually. Sigh...Ok, let's do this; Judo Chop, Judo Chop. 2.) Oh, he's good 1.) Who are you? Do you realize how many unidentified henchmen i've killed over the years? Look at you, you don't even have a name tag! Tell you what... why don't you just lay down, ok? (full quote)
  You look very toit! Yesh, toit like a toiger! (full quote)
25503 ?????Tea Kettle...and then she shat on a turtle (full quote)
  I dont speak freaky deaky dutch (full quote)
  goldmember: Austin Power's fasha! Dr. Evil: His what? Number 2: His fasha Dr. Evil. Dr. Evil: His farjer? What's a farjer? goldmember: His fasha. Ya know... the fasha? Dr. Evil: Yeah, goldmember, I don't speak freaky deaky Dutch, ok perv boy? goldmember: His fasha! Dad... fasha... Dr. Evil: OH his dad! Oooo.... his father. goldmember: Yes. His fasha. I have a Dutch accent. Isn't that weird? (full quote)
  SCOTTY!!!!!! Take it down a notch! (full quote)
  Dr. Evil: For example... Mini Me loves chocolate... SCOTTY DON'T! Scotty: What? I like chocolate just fine... Dr. Evil: SCOTTY DON'T! Scotty: Oh this seems awfully farmiliar. Wait... lemme do what I do... WOULD YA STOP... Dr. Evil: (makes all these weird sounds and faces) Scotty: What are you... Dr. Evil: HOW 'BOUT YOU DON'T. LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, SCOTTY DON'T! (full quote)
  (Austin is hanging onto Dr. Evil's pants that he just accidently pulled down) Austin: You know, I always thought you were crazy. Dr. Evil: I know. Austin: But now I see your nuts. Ah, thank you! (full quote)
  moley moley moley! (full quote)
  (GETS HIT IN THE GROIN WITH A PROP METEOR) good one A-Hole! good God, let me find my balls here. 1,2....and 3...ok im fine, im fine. (full quote)
sugarfalls Isn't this magical. (full quote)
sugarfalls Can I paint his yoohoo gooooold? It's kind of my thing.How about no, you crazy dutch bastard! (full quote)
sugarfalls Remember when I said, we aren't that different you and I?*flashback* We aren't that different, you and i See, I did say that. (full quote)
sugarfalls Nothing could be my father from the truthYou said my fatherNo I dadn'tHi-ohhhhDidn't. Did not. For me, this is a dad issue.Sha-bamDead issue. Dead dad. Dead beat dad. Daddy didn't love me... (full quote)
sugarfalls Scotty's on fire. (full quote)
sugarfalls And that's the way, uh huh uh huh, I like it. KC and the sunshine band. (full quote)
sugarfalls There are only two things that I hate in this world. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures... and the Dutch.Take the fajha away (full quote)
sugarfalls Dutch-hater! (full quote)
sugarfalls Who really throws a cupcake... honestly. (full quote)
sugarfalls Haven't you ever heard of knocking man?Riiight.Don't forget Mr. Powers, you have a brief oral examination.I hope it's mostly oral, and not too brief... baby. (full quote)
sugarfalls Why don't you just call it preparation ass cream, you ass.You want some ice cream?Yes, I would love some chocolate ass cream.Perhaps later. (full quote)
sugarfalls Not who, Mr. Powers, but when. 1975, Studio 69 Disco, on the corner of 69th and 8th. Go now. Fly fly! (full quote)
sugarfalls You mean I actually have freakin' sharks with freakin' laser beams attached to their freakin' heads? (full quote)
sugarfalls RUN!!!!! It's Godzilla!It Looks like Godzilla But due to international Copyright Laws.....It's not.Still we should run like it is Godzilla!Though it's not (full quote)
sugarfalls what do you know about my father's where... about... s? (full quote)
sugarfalls Mole! Bloody mole! We aren't supposed to talk about the bloody mole, but there's a bloody mole winking me in the face! I want to cut it off, chop it up, and make guacamoooole! (full quote)
sugarfalls Would you like a Shmoke and a pancake?A what?Y'know, a flapjack and a cigarette? Cigar and a waffle? Crepe and a pipe? Bong and a blintz? No? Ok. Then there is no pleasing you. (full quote)
  Dr. Evil: Nigel Powers, meet my assistant Mini Me Nigel: Oh! I thought I smelled cabbage! (full quote)
  got an issue heres a tissue (full quote)
  u are so beautiful are u a clone of an angel??? are u sure u dont have alittle clone in u?? would u like to...... (full quote)
  sir dr evil is not bluffing one of our satellites is falling out of obit. which 1?? the one that looks like pair of giant....MELONS BIG JUICY MELONS!!! are they nice n firm??? well what do u think?? look at that it looks like a set a giant (fat men at football team w/ titans painted on their chests) check it out those remind me of.... boobs boobs ozzy?? these film makers are just fucking boobs.. what do u mean dad?? well their using the same fucking joke as they used in the last fucking austin powers movie.. what fucking joke?? ya know the fucking joke about the rocket that looks like some guys long smooth....JOHNSON (full quote)
  ITS SHAZAM NOT SHABAM U DUTCH WHORE (full quote)
  number 2: George Clooney Dr Evil: Ooh number 2: Julia Roberts Dr Evil: hey! number 2: and Leo Dicaprio Dr Evil (whisper to mini-me): Leo! (full quote)
  ok goldmember dont play the laughing boy (goldmember giggles an then quickly looks bak) theres only 2 things i hate on this planet, people who are intollerant of other peoples cultures, and the dutch. goldmember: tke the faja awaaayyy goldmember:(as austins dad is walking by) dutch hater.. (full quote)
  but when your an overweight child, in a society that demands perfection, were your sense of right, wrong, fair, unfair will always be tragically skewed (fat bastard farts) austin: did u just soil yourself?? fat bastard: maybe..it did sound a little wet didnt it right at the end. oOo lets have a smell oOo waufting waufting O everyone likes there own brand dont they O this is magic. all right anaylsis, O smells like carrots and throw up. O that could gag a maggot. it smells like, hot, sick, ASS in a dead carcass. oh even stink would say that stinks. ya know when u got an apartment buiulding an u can smell other peoples cookin on each floor an u go what r they cookin, that plus crap. (full quote)
  It's like friggin cat nip for clones (full quote)
  1. Surely you have a little clone in you. 2.NO. 3. Would you like some? (full quote)
  1) All right boys.. Chins up Trousers Down 2) All their privates have their prvates painted gold how bizarre! (full quote)
  Shaggy baby (full quote)
  Austin:Eww,there trouser snakes,their wedding tackle,their twig 'n berries!They turned gold! (full quote)
  And thats the way uh huh uh huh I like it.. KC and the Sunshine band! (full quote)
  You Go now Austin Powers.(runs into door and it opens)... FLY FLY! ..(looks around confused.. slowy shuts door) Ill get it!.. (full quote)
  Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto. (full quote)
  what the.... I didn't have any corn!!! (full quote)
  I've got preperation H in my trunk and schmokey the bear on my rear. (full quote)
  Hey! Diper lady. I got my diper... mmm yes. look at my sexy body (full quote)
  i'm sorry but i don't speak freaky-deaky-dutch (full quote)
  Mini-Me's gone mental on account of the chocolate. Its like fricken catnip for clones. (full quote)
  Mini-me: (writing) Are you sure you don't have any clone in you? Foxxy Cleopatra: Yes, I'm sure. Mini-me: (Writing) Would you like to? (full quote)
  Dr. Evil: Well, Scott, I'm glad that we're sprechen-sie the same linguity! (full quote)
  Dr. Evil: Mini-Me's gone mental on account of the chocolate. It's like frickin catnip for clones! (full quote)
  I never knew my birth parents. There was a car accident. my birth mother was incinerated, and I only survived because her smoking carcass had formed a protective cocoon of slaughtered human effluence. A Belgian man and his fifteen year-old love slave were looting the accident scene, came across a blood soaked baby, moi, and they raised me to be evil. You know, very Norman Rockwell. (full quote)
  preperations a-g were a complite failure. i think i will call this one, preparation h. scott: ha, why dont you just call it preparation ass creme ya ass. dr. evil: what you want some ice cream? scott: yes, i would love some chocolate ass creme dr. evil: perhaps later? (full quote)
  would you like a smoke and a pancake? (full quote)
  As for you Mr. Powers this is bad news bears....Walter Matthua (full quote)
  easy Peasy Lemon Squeezey (full quote)
  AP: Did you just soil yourself? FB: Maybe! I did sound a bit wet, right at the end! (full quote)
  AP: Did you just soil yourself? FB: Maybe! It did sound a bit wet, right at the end! (full quote)
  Dr Evil: My submarine is long and hard and full of sea men... (full quote)
  You may be a cunning linguist, but I am a master debater. (full quote)
  SCHEITZER (full quote)
  Who throws a cupcake??? Honestly??? (full quote)
  Dr. Evil: allow me to demonstrate, lower the globe. Frau: lower the globbbbbbbe!! Dr. Evil ahhh oooww goldmember:shiza Dr. Evil well congratulations numb nutz you've suceeded in turning me into a frickin jack in the box. get it off, get it off, its dark. its dark ok i'm ok release the medior Frau :release the medior, ooohnhhh oohhh no way goldmember:right in the kinicke god damiit ooohhh guys way to go a-hole allrite hold on let me try to find my balls for god sake 1 2 and 3 ok .i'm okay (full quote)
  easy peasy lemon squeeezy (full quote)
  yeeehaw copy that ya sum bitch pile of monkey nuts!!!!! (full quote)
  if you've got an issue heres a tissue! (full quote)
  Mole! Bloody mole! We're not supposed to talk about the bloody mole, but there's a bloody mole winking me in the face! I'm gonna cut it off and chop it up and make some guacaMOLE! (full quote)
3225 I just took a viagra. It got stuck in me throat and I've had a stiff neck for hours. ah thank you! (full quote)
3225 1) can I have autograph? 2) And your name is? 1) Fook me 2) Oh behave baby. Now your name is 1) Fook me 2) You kiss your mother with that mouth? (full quote)
3225 1) Fook mi that was fast 2) Fook yu 1) You're going the right way for a smacked bottom and I don't care who knows it. (full quote)
3225 We're going to see the twins! (full quote)
CaliGirl 1)I used to think you were crazy. 2)I know. 1)But now I can see your nuts. (full quote)
sugarfalls You look very toit! Yesh, toit like a toiger! Yesh Yesh Yesh!You know, I don't think that's something one dude should say to another dude! Yeah! A little creepy! Mmhmm! (full quote)
sugarfalls His what?His fajha, Dr. Evil.His farjer?His fajha! You know, the fajhaYou know goldmember, I dont speak freaky-deaky dutch. Okay perv boy?Fajha, his dad, dad is fajha.Oh his dad, oh his father... father... father. (full quote)
sugarfalls All right, let me find my balls for God's sake! 1, 2... and 3, okay; I'm ok. (full quote)
Roy Phux How bout a smoke and a pancake? (full quote)
26497 You have the right to remain sexy sugar. Ooh! I hope a search is invoved!(they both laugh) (full quote)
26497 Nice to mole you.Meet you! (full quote)
26497 Don't say mole. Austin! I said mole. Shut Up! (full quote)
26563 (Austin grabs Fat Bastard's nipples and twists them) Fat Bastard: AHHH! My titties! You gave me a nurple! (full quote)
26565 Foxxy Cleopatra: Mama only got a taste of honey, but she wanted the whole beehive. Austin: Oh, beehive! (full quote)
26565 Mini-Me: (writing) Are you sure you don't have a little clone in you? Foxxy Cleopatra: Yes, I'm sure. Mini-Me: (writing) Would you like to? (full quote)
26565 Dr. Evil: Mini-Me's gone mental on account of the chocolate. It's like frickin catnip for clones! (full quote)
26589 Fat Bastard: (looking into a toilet) I didn't have any corn! (full quote)
26589 Fat Bastard: Hey diaper lady! Here's my diaper! I think a went too soon. Oh yes, I left you a rosebud! (full quote)
26589 goldmember: Would you like a shmoke and a pancake? You know, a cigarette and a flapjack? Cigar and a waffle? Pipe and a crepe? Bong and a blintz? (full quote)
26619 Dr. Evil: Well, Scott, I'm glad to see that we're sprechen-sie the same linguity! (full quote)
26721 Fat Bastard: I'd like to have a go with that filly! Do you find me sexy? Oh, look at my titties! (full quote)
26879 its like freakin cat nip for clones (full quote)
26879 1)ladies and gentlemen my plan is scottie dont (full quote)
26879 it looks like minnie me wont get any CHOCALATE (full quote)
26879 Scotie Dont (full quote)
27114 goldmember: Take the fahzha away! (full quote)
27114 goldmember: My winky was a key! (full quote)
27182 It's like fickin cat nip for clones. (full quote)
27182 How about you don't, ladies and gentlemen, Scottie don't. (full quote)
27182 1)Ladies and gentlemen my plan is, Scottie don't. 2)Oh come on, you're such a lame ass. (full quote)
27182 1)Yes Frau, on the whole I think preparation H feels good. [laughter] 1)What is it now? 2)No, nothing, you know what, I agree. Preparation H does feel good---on the whole. 1)Well I'm glad we're sprechen sie the same lingitie. (full quote)
27182 1)Oh! Someone has some daddy issues. 2)Nothing could be my father from the truth. 1)You said my father. 2)No I dadn't. 1)How! 2) Didn't! Did not. 1)Shabah! 2)For me this is a dad issue. Did issue! Dead dad! Dead beat dad! Daddy didn't love me! (full quote)
27182 1)Ok chaps. Chins up, trousers down. I think we may have found a clue. 2) G--blimey! All your privates have had their privates painted gold! How bizzare! Imagine. Gilded talywackers, golden wedding tackle, 14 carat trouser snakes. 1)That's enough. 2)Ok. (full quote)
27182 1)By the way, I do realize I have a large mole on my face. 2)Where? What? Where's that mole? I didn't see one. 1)I also realize the irony that I am myself--a mole. 2)No one would make that connection. (full quote)
27182 1)Yes, nice to mole you. Meet! Nice to meet your mole. Don't say mole. 2)Stop. 1)I said mole. 2)Stop! 3)Bye. 1)Mole. Mole. Mole! 4)Oh shut up! 1)Moley, moley, moley, moley, moley! (full quote)
27182 There are only two things I hate; people who are intolerant of other people's cultures...and the Dutch. (full quote)
27182 Oops! I did it again, baby! (full quote)
27182 I'm from Holland! Isn't that vierd? (full quote)
27182 My neck looks like a vagina. (full quote)
27182 1)Can I paint his yoo-hoo gold? It's kind of my thing. 2)How about no, you crazy Dutch bastard! (full quote)
  1# may i present to you the very sexual the very toyt..Austin Powers Fash 2# his wat? 3# his fasha dr. evil 2# his farger... wats a farger 1# u know the fasha 2# yea goldmember i dont speak freaky dicky dutch ok perv. boy.. yea 1# u know the fasha.. the dad 2# oooo his dad his F-A-T-H-E-R FATHER (full quote)
  Austin: well i dont like to use gadgets... outside the bedroom i thank u (hahahahaha) (full quote)
  1)ur not gonna eat that are u?...yea...ya did...thats just gross 2)yesh....shalty....yesh yesh (full quote)
  Yes....squid prorow.... (full quote)
  Austn:your crazy Goldmember! Goldmember:And thats the vay uh huh uh huh I like it!(wispering)K.C. and da Sunshine Band (full quote)
  Austn:your crazy Goldmember! Goldmember:And thats the vay uh huh uh huh I like it!(wispering)K.C. and da Sunshine Band (full quote)
  Japanese man 1: Run! It's godzilla!! Japanese man 2: It looks like godzilla but due to international copy laws it's not Japanese man 1: Still, we should run like it is godzilla!! Japanese man 2: Thought it isn't Both: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! (full quote)
  Dr. Evil: My plan is, how bou't you don't...ladies and gentlemen, Scotty don't! (full quote)
  sexy man (full quote)
  ahhhhhhhh its GODZILLA!!! -no, accoring to internation copyright right laws its not GODZILLA - its GODZILLA..RUN!!!! (running and screamign liek little bitches (full quote)
  MY WINKIE IS A KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY! ahahahahahhahahaha! (full quote)
  I'm usin this cat as a distraction! (full quote)
  ouch-ki-bibble (full quote)
  ladies and gentelmen...welcome to my new submirane lair....its long hard and full of seamen... and G:o yes yes this is a keeper....dr.e:ok youre not going to put that skin into youre mouth are you?....G:(eats skin) dr.e:ok you did...thats jest gross... and (lowers globe)well congradulations numnuts you've sussced in making me a friggin jack in the box!!!....(lowers the metorite...OOO GOD DAMNIT....NO WAY...GUYS....WAY TO GO AHOLE!!! (full quote)
  I wanna take that mole and cut it up in a million pieces and make some QUACKAMOLIE!!!!!!!! (full quote)
  your ass is happy?? (full quote)
  toit... toit like a tioger> (full quote)
  DE: ya, ba...by........no? just trying it on. (full quote)
  scott: why don't you just call it operation ass-cream, you ass dr. evil: i'm sorry, would you like some ice cream? scott: yes, i'd love some chocolate ass cream. dr. evil: perhaps later... (full quote)
  scott: why don't you just call it operation ass-cream, you ass dr. evil: i'm sorry, would you like some ice cream? scott: yes, i'd love some chocolate ass cream. dr. evil: perhaps later... (full quote)
  your very toight, i can tell by your toight pants your toight like a toiger (full quote)
  All right, let me find my balls for God's sakes! 1, 2... and 3, okay; I'm ok. (full quote)
  did u just soil urself? maybe..it did sound a lil wet at the en didnt it eww!! alright lets have a smell shall we..wafting wafting..everyone likes their own brand dont they..this is magic!! alright analysis..smells like carrots and throw up..o that could gag a maggot.o even stink would say that stinks..you knowwhen u go in those apartment buildings and u smell other peoples cooking on each floor..that plus crap!!!! (full quote)
  It's Godzilla! Due to international copyright laws, it's not Godzilla. Still, we should act like it is Godzilla! (full quote)
  There are two things I cannot stand: people who are intolerant of other people's cultures, and the Dutch! (full quote)
  How 'bout no, you crazy Dutch bastard? (full quote)
  only a bloody Dutchman! (full quote)
  ok ok lets analyze it! (wafts fart to his face and sniffs)it smells like carrots and throw up! you know when you go to an apartment building? and you can smell other peoples cooking and you go 'what are they cooking?'. that.... mixed with crap! (full quote)
  It's like freekin' catnip for clones! (full quote)
  blimey you're a tripod (full quote)
  MY WINKEES A KEY ! (full quote)
  DR EVIL: Preparations A through G have all failed, which is why I will now unveil my new scheme. I call it...Preparation H! (Scott laughs) DR EVIL: What? SCOTT: Why don't you just call it Operation Ass Cream? You ass. DR EVIL: I'm sorry? Did you want some ice cream. SCOTT: Yes. I'd love some chocolate ass cream. (full quote)
  Preperation H feels good on the hole (full quote)
  (dutch accent) I'm from Holland, ishn't dat veird? (full quote)
  tell me what you know about my father's where...about...ssss... (full quote)
  you want a smoke and a pancake? (full quote)
  Bad news bears. Walter Mathou (full quote)
  Well, i guess there is no pleasing you eh? (full quote)
  1 BBBIIIILLIIOONN dollars!MUAHAHAHA (full quote)
  i want to cut that mole of and make it in to gacamole (full quote)
  if u ever get tired u can use it as a kickstand (full quote)
  Ok i dont speak freaky deaky dutch ok perv boy (full quote)
  easy Peasy Lemon-Squeezy (full quote)
  Well i hate to be the Bear of Bad News Walter Mendel (full quote)
  MOLE! Theres a bloody MOLE starting me in the face! Im gonna chop it off an cut it up an make some guacaMOLE! (full quote)
  (fat bastard gets off the toilet and looks in it) what?!?!?!?! i didn't have any corn!!!!!! (full quote)
  Hey diaper lady! Heres my diaper.--FB (full quote)
  goldmember:Dr.Evil You look very toit Yesh toit like a toiger Yesh Yesh Yesh Dr. Evil: You know goldmember? I dont think thats something one dude should say to another dude... Yeah, A little creepy.Mmhmm (full quote)
  Austin's Father: There are two tings I can't stand in the world. People who arn't sensitive to other people's cultures, and the Dutch. (full quote)
  mole bloody mole i wanna rip i off and chop it up and make some guacamole!!! (full quote)
  i would love some chocolate ass cream (full quote)
  fat bastard: i dident have any corn (full quote)
  It's like catnip for clones (full quote)
  Number 3: Bye. Austin: mole. (Number 3 walks away) Austin: Mooole. (Basil shushes Austin) Austin: mole! Basil: Oh shut up! Austin: moley, moley, moley, moley, moley! (full quote)
  Dr. Evil: it's long and hard and full of seamen! (full quote)
  Number 2: Dr. Evil, don't u think its time u finished unveiling your plan? Dr. Evil: Yes thank you Number 2. Ladies and gentleman my plan is - Scotty don't! Scott: Oh come on! You're such a lame-ass! Dr. Evil: Mini-Me aime chocolat tres beacoup oui? eh? (pop) Scotty n'est pas! (full quote)
  Austin: Mr. Roboto was lying to us Foxxy: tell me something i don't know Austin: I opened my mouth and kissed a horse once Foxxy: say what? Austin: that's something you don't know (full quote)
  (Kevin Spacey/Dr. Evil): Hey Powers, you better figgin watch yourself because this is one evil doctor who does make house calls, right Mini-Me? (Danny DeVito/Mini-Me): Hey assholes! Over here! I'm Mini-Me! Come and get me! *Fires gun* (full quote)
  (Dr. Evil talking to prisoners): Tonight you're going to start a riot and we're gonna walk out the front door! *Prisoners laugh* (Prisoner): Hey man, i know a guy who's on crack that make more sense than you. (Dr. Evil): really? then i'll put it to you this way cuz! *Half the prisoners start dancing w/ him and Mini-Me* (full quote)
  *Mini-Me's opening an envelope, Austin powers come into his apartment and spots him w/ knife* (Austin): Ahhh! Assassin! (Mini-Me): EEEEEEEEE! *Makes a peace sign* (Austin): Oh you want to be friends right? *Mini-Me nods* Wait a tick... *remembers* Peace? Owwww! *Back* I'm not falling for that again! (full quote)
  (Nigel): you got an issue? here's a tissue! (full quote)
  *Globe lands on Dr. Evil's head* (Dr. Evil): Owwwwwww! (Goldmember): Shiza! (Dr.Evil): Well congratulations numbnuts! You've succeded in turning me into a friggin' jack-in-the-box! (full quote)
  ..........having said that i do have a few suggestions (full quote)
  Fat Bastard: You know what my favorite Helen Hunt movie is....Twister (full quote)
  do u want a smoke and a pancake (full quote)
  Did you just soil yourself? Maybe. It did sound a little wet, didn't it right at the end. Ooo Let's have a smell, alright. Wafting, wafting. Oh, everyone likes their own brand, don't they? This is magic. Alright, analasis. It smells like carrots and throw up. Oh, that could gag a maggot. It smells like hot sick ass in a dead carcass. Even stink would say that stinks. You know when you go in an apartment building and you smell other peoples cooking on each floor, and you go 'what are they cookin?' That plus crap. (full quote)
  Would you like a smuck and a pancake no? A bong and a blintz no? a pipe and a cripe?.............. (full quote)
  A) Did you just soil your self?? FB) Maby.. Alright now, everybody take a wiff of that... ooh this is magical.... you know when you go into an apartmet building and you say *ooh, what are they cookin?*, well, that plus crap, ooh, every body loves their own brand dont they? (full quote)
  stiff neck (full quote)
  Fat Bastard: You know what my favorite Helen Hunt movie is? Twister (full quote)
  Dr. Evil: On the whole, I think Preperation H feels good. Scott: Laughs Dr. Evil: What? Scott: No, you're right. Preperation H DOES feel good. On the hole. (full quote)
  Sorry i don't speak speak fraky deaky dutch... (full quote)
  That one smelt like carrots and throw-up! (full quote)
  This diaper's makin' my nuts rub together.It's gonnna start a fire! (full quote)
  Austin: what's your name? Girl: Fook Mi Austin: you kiss your mother with that mouth?, now what's your name? Girl :Fook Mi! *turns around and shows her name on her 'backpack'* Austin: oh taht's your name, fook mi. Fook Mi: you want a drink? Austin: yes i'd love one *she rusn off* i have my own bar right .... *turns around to see Fook Mi* Fook Mi that was fast, Fook Mi: oh behave *well no i dont think she says that but somethingof the sort* (full quote)
  Smashing Basil...... a pimp-mobile (full quote)
  I used to think you were crazy but now, I see your nuts, a-thank you (full quote)
  Did you just eat your skin? Okay thats just gross (full quote)
  Let me just make sure I have all my balls. One, two...and three. Okay. (full quote)
  and a flock of seagulls (full quote)
  uh JESUS CHRIST, This Diper Is Makin Ma Nuts Rub Togther, ITS GONNA start A FIRE (full quote)
  I've got bigger titis than you do! (full quote)
  ahh! i see you're a tri-pod (full quote)
  young austin to young dr. evil- Have u seen my longfellow? how bout my dickens? (full quote)
  jesus christ he's tiny!i got bigger chunks of corn in my crap!!!!wait a minute...he kinda looks like a baby.Comere IM GONNA EAT ya!!!IM BIGGER THAN U IM HIGHER ON THE food CHAIN!!!get in my belly!! cmon! (full quote)
  FB: oh this diaper's makin my nuts rub together. its gonna start a fire! (full quote)
  Dr. Evil:Ohh! I havnt laughed that hard since i was a little girl. (full quote)
5033 I tried to go on a diet you know. I zone. You know carbs are the enemy. (full quote)
10929 That's The Way (I Like It). (full quote)
10929 what The World Needs Now Is Love. (full quote)
beekers Haha, the tiny one can't take a hint! (full quote)
beekers I took a Viagra and it got stuck in my throat. Now I've had a stiff neck for weeks, ithankyou! (full quote)
beekers 1: Tell me something I don't know. 2: I open mouth kissed a horse once. 1: Say what? 2: That's something you don't know. (full quote)
beekers Twins, Basil, twins! (full quote)
beekers I hope my wire fightin' team is ready... (full quote)
beekers But nothing compares to this: being in the belly of the beast night after night. Daddy's all pent up -- let's freak!! (full quote)
beekers Looks like two eggs in a hankey... (full quote)
beekers 1: Well, all I know is Mama only got a taste of honey, but she wanted the whole beehive. 2:Oh, beehive! (full quote)
19601 what about nooooooo ? You crazy dutch bastard !!! (full quote)
20947 1: Can I paint their privates gold? It's kind of my thing. 2: How 'bout NO, you crazy Dutch bastard! (full quote)
27182 Sorry, I don't speak Freaky Deaky Dutch... (full quote)
27182 1)Dr. Evil, we still have the ultimate insurance policy. May I present to you, the very sexual, the very toite, Asutin Power's fassia. 2)His what? 3)His fassia Dr. Evil. 2)His ferder? 1)His fassia! You know, the fassia. 3)You know Goldmember, I don't speak freaky-deaky dutch. Okay perv boy? 1)Fassia, his dad, dad is fassia. 2)Oh his dad, oh his FATHER. (full quote)
27182 1)Did you just soil yourself? 2)Maybe [laughs]It did sound a little wet didn't? Right at the end! Oooh! Heh heh heh. Let's have a smell alright? Ooh, wafting, wafting. Oh everyone likes their own brand don't they? This is magic! Alright - analysis. Ooh, smells like carrots in throw up! Oh that could gag a maggot! It smells like hot sick... ass in a dead carcass! Even stink would say that stinks! You know when you go into an apartment building and you smell other people's cooking on each floor and you go 'What are they cookin'?' That, plus crap! (full quote)
27182 1)your car's a mini. 2)It's not the size mate, it's how you use it. (full quote)
27182 1)They're getting away! 2)Tell me something I don't know. 1)I open-mouth kissed a horse once. 2)Say what?! 1)That's something you don't know. (full quote)
27182 Hi, I'm Dixie. Dixie Normous. (full quote)
27312 I thought you were crazy but now I can see your nuts, uh thank ya. (full quote)
27355 goldmember: May I present the very sexual, very toit, Austin Powers's fahzha! Dr. Evil: His what? Number 2: His fahzha, Dr. Evil. Dr. Evil: Farger? What's a farger? goldmember: You know, his fahzha! Dr. Evil: I'm sorry, goldmember, I don't speak freaky-deaky Dutch. goldmember: You know, his dad! Dad is fahzha! Dr. Evil: Oh, father! goldmember: Yes, I have a Dutch accent. Isn't that weird. (full quote)
GenieChick Ouch! Kabibble! (full quote)
GenieChick your going the right way for a smack bottom and I don't care who knows it! (full quote)
GenieChick Austin, this is my twin sister Fook Yu,,, Fook Yu,,,, Fook Mi (full quote)
GenieChick Man I know guys on crack who make more sense then you! (full quote)
GenieChick Scotty Don't! (full quote)
GenieChick It's long and hard and full of sea-men! (full quote)
GenieChick Would you like a shmoke and a pancake? hmm? a Waffle and a cigarette?No? Pipe and a Crepe? No? Bong and a Blintz? No!! (full quote)
28804 a)hmmm_______ perhaps it's time for you to finishe un vailing your plan? b) yes thankyou________. ladies and gentlemen my plan is ...________don't. c) awwww come on your such a lame ass! (full quote)
28804 you have the right to remain sexy sugar! (full quote)
28804 a) you know this is causing me serious physcalogical harm b) ohh ...i dont no who am i (full quote)
28804 a_)you ok ________ did i pull to hard i didn't mean to hurt you b) _____ a) yeah b)what does _________ plan got to do with us (full quote)
28804 a)preperations A to G were a complete failure but now ladies and gentleman we finally have a working tractor beam which we shall call preperation H! b)(laughs) a) what? b) why don't you just call it preperation ass cream you ass. a) i'm sorry did you want some ice cream b) yes. i would love some choclate ass cream. a)perhaps later c)______ i love your plan a)you ah d) yah ehh dr it's a real good plan a)yes ________ on the whole i think preperation H feels good b)(laughs) a) what is it now? b)no nothing, you know what i agree preperation H does feel good......'on the hole' a) well i'm glad were sprekenzi the same ligadi, yeah ladies and gentlemen. using my time machine i shall travel back to 1975 pick up gold member and bring him back to the future. and the best part of this plan is...no one can stop me... not even__________________! e)your surrounded _________ a) shit! (full quote)
29471 It's long and hard and full of 'seamen' (full quote)
Debozero smells like carrots and throw-up!!!! (full quote)
30929 I'm from Holland! - ishn't dat veird? (full quote)
34453 quid pro row mr. powers...... yes squid pro row..? (full quote)
34453 Dr.E-lower the globe Frau-LOWER THE GLOBEEEEEE Dr.E-owwwwwwww! goldmember-shizah Dr.E- get it off! get it off! its dark,its dark!!! (full quote)
34960 How bout no you crazy dutch bastard!!! (full quote)
34960 I only got a taste of honey but i wanted the whole beehive Oh beehive (full quote)
37887 There are only two things in this world that I cannot stand: People who are intolerant of other people's cultures, and the Dutch. (full quote)
37887 Dr. Evil I used to think that you were crazy, but now I can see your nuts. Ah thank you! (full quote)
45511 Put that in your pipe and smoke it. (full quote)
45511 Put that in your pipe and smoke it. (full quote)
p18m (1Melons get your juicy melons. (2 Are they firm? (1 you tell me (full quote)
debs777 I am Phuka you this is Phuka me (full quote)