Movie Quotes Bank


MovieQuotes runs by contribution by its talented members. We would like to thank all members for submitting quotes to make this site possible. We are growing by leaps and bounds with many new movie quotes listed daily.

2015 will be another great year with some blockbuster movies, so come back often and enjoy your favorite movie line and quotes all in one easy place. Don't forget to bookmark our site and your favorite quotes pages.

If you would like to additional quotes, please visit the Submit Quote page. Find your favorite here.





Odd Couple, The - 1968 Movie Quotes


Posted ByQuote
3505 It took me three weeks to figure out that F.U. stood for Felix Unger! (full quote)
4921 -he's too nervous to kill himself. He wears his seat belt in the drive-in movie. (full quote)
5172 (1)A whole bottle of pills! My God, get an ambulance! (2) Wait a minute, will ya?! We don't even know what kind! (1) What difference does it make?! He took a whole bottle! (2) Well, maybe they were vitamins! He could be the healthiest one in the room! (full quote)
5172 Don't threaten me with jail, Blanche, because it's not a threat. With my expenses and my alimony, a prisoner takes home more pay than I do. (full quote)
5172 (1) where ya going? (2) To the John. (1) Alone? (full quote)
5172 (1) God help me. (2) Never mind helping you!. Tell him to save my meatloaf! (full quote)
5172 Why don't you live in a closet? I'll leave your meals outside the door and slide in the newspapers. (full quote)
5172 (1) For God's sake, do something. Say something. (2) what? what do you say to a man who's crying in your bathroom? (full quote)
5172 You've just been invited to spend the evening in a two bedroom hothouse with the coo-coo Pigeon sisters! what do you mean you're not going?! (full quote)
5172 life goes on, even for those of us who are divorced, broke, and sloppy. (full quote)
5172 You can't spend the rest of your life crying, it annoys people in the movies. (full quote)
5172 (1) I'm in for a quarter. (2) Aren't you going to look at your cards first? (1) what for? I'm gonna bluff anyway. (full quote)
5172 You're you! You walk, and talk, and cry, and complain, and eat little green pills, and send suicide telegrams. No one else does that, Felix, no one! (full quote)
5172 You're not nothing, you're something! You're a person! You're flesh, and blood, and bones, and hair, and nails, and ears! You're not a fish. You're not a buffalo. (full quote)
5172 (1) Funny, I haven't thought of a woman in weeks. (2)I fail to see the humor (full quote)
5172 Murray, lend me twenty dollars or I'll call your wife and tell her you're in central Park wearing a dress. (full quote)
5172 (1)Who wants food? (2) what do ya got? (1) I've got brown sandwiches and green sandwiches. Which one do ya want? (2) what's the green? (1)It's either very new cheese, or very old meat. (2) I'll take the brown. (full quote)
5172 Why doesn't he hear me? I know I'm talking, I recognize my voice. (full quote)
5172 Don't point that finger at me unless you intend to use it. (full quote)
5172 (1) You are not going anyplace until you take it back. (2) Take what back? (1) Let it be on your head. what the Hell is that, the curse of the cat people? (full quote)
7937 It's not spaghetti, it's linguine. Now it's garbage. (full quote)
  Murry, I'll give you $200 for your gun. (full quote)
8936 1) I can cook. I'm a terrific cook. 2) You don't have to cook. I've got enough potato chips to last me a whole year. (full quote)
8936 I love you almost as much as you do. (full quote)
13202 Look at this. You're the only man in the world with clenched hair. (full quote)
11538 (Speed)You look at your watch once more you get the peanuts in your face! (full quote)
11538 (Murray)How many cards you got? (Speed)Four cards. We all have four cards. If you gave us one more we'd all have five. If you gave us two more we'd all have six. You understand how it works now? (full quote)
11538 (Murray)Take away his belt and his shoelaces. (full quote)
  greed,treachery,violence,selfishness,deceit..all the qualities that made this country great. (full quote)
10929 --Can't you just heat it up? --Heat it up? what the hell am I, the Magic Chef? (full quote)
10929 Hello? Divorced, Broke, and Sloppy. (full quote)
  Getting a clear picture on Channel 2 is not my idea of whoopee (full quote)
  I cant stand it anymore Felix ... I'm cracking up...... everything you do irritates me...... I hate it when you put little notes on my pillow......I told you 138 times..... don't put little notes on my pillow....... *We are all out of cornflakes ..........F.U.* It took me 3 hours to figure out that *F.U.* stood for Felix Unger....... (full quote)
33944 I cant stand it anymore Felix..... I'm cracking up..... everything you do irritates me.... I hate it when you put little notes on my pillow......I told you 138 times..... don't put little notes on my pillow....... We are all out of cornflakes ..........F.U. It took me 3 hours to figure out that F.U. stood for Felix Unger....... (full quote)
10929 --what's the hell's so funny? --It's not spaghetti, it's linguini. --Now it's garbage! (full quote)
  nobody likes black meat (full quote)
33944 Life goes on for even those of us who are divorced broke and sloppy....... (answers the phone) Nyelllo!! divorced broke and sloppy???? (full quote)
10929 You want to do me a really big favor? Smoke toward New Jersey. (full quote)
33944 Hey, did you know Felix was once locked in a john overnight? He wrote out his entire will on half a roll of toilet paper! (full quote)
33944 His refrigerator has been out of order for two weeks now. I saw milk standing in there that wasn't even in the bottle! (full quote)
10929 Drains can be fixed. That's why we have plumbers. (full quote)
33944 Don't threaten me with jail, Blanche, because it's not a threat.... with my expenses and my alimony, a prisoner takes home more pay than I do! (full quote)
33944 1/_Murray, lend me twenty dollars or I'll call your wife and tell her you're in central Park wearing a dress. 2/_I was undercover!! (full quote)
33944 1/_In other words, you're throwin' me out! 2/_Not *in other words*....those are the perfect ones! (full quote)
33944 Getting a clear picture on Channel Two is not my idea of *whoopee*! (full quote)
33944 1/_what if he's lying in a gutter somewhere?.... Who would know who he is? 2/_He's got 92 credit cards in his wallet..... The minute something happens to him, America lights up. (full quote)
33944 1/_what are you, crazy, letting him go to the john alone? 2/_Suppose he tries to kill himself! 3/_How's he gunna kill himself in the john? 2/_Whaddaya mean, how?... razor blades, poison, anything that's in there. 3/_Nah, that's the kids bathroom..... The worst he could do in there is brush his teeth to death. (full quote)
33944 They're here!... The dinner guests.... I'll go get a saw and cut the meat! (full quote)
33944 1/_I'm telling you, I'm worried.... I know Felix. He's gunna try something crazy. 2/_You mean you just threw him out? 3/_That's right, I threw him out. It was my decision. All right, I admit it. Let it be on my head. 2/_Let what be on your head? 3/_How should I know? Felix put it there.... Ask him. (full quote)
33944 [answers the phone] N'yellllooo... Oscar the poker player?? (full quote)