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Ref, The - 1994 Movie Quotes


Posted ByQuote
734 I highjacked my fucking parents. (full quote)
734 That makes you a liar. Capitol L;small i;small a;small r;period. (full quote)
734 Excuse me! Excuse me! EXCUSE ME! The corpse still has the floor, if you don't mind! (full quote)
1212 Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me, excuse me, excuse me!!! If YOU don't mind, the corpse still has the floor. (full quote)
4335 MOTHER..........is it possible for you to shut the fuck up for ten minutes????? (full quote)
4335 You know what mom? You know what i'm going to get you next year for christmas?? A giant fucking cross, so every time you feel unappreciated for all your sacrifices, you can climb on up and nail yourself to it. (full quote)
5971 This is a gun. It's loaded. Shut up! (full quote)
5971 your husband's not dead lady, He's hiding! (full quote)
6335 Great. I hijacked my fucking parents. (full quote)
  Lady, your husbands not dead...he's hidin'. (full quote)
  I thought mother's were supposed to be nice and sweet and bake cookies, I know loan sharks more forgiving than you. (full quote)
  Lady, I swear to god if you hit that kid ONE more TIME, I'm gonna shove that pig's head RIGHT UP YOUR ASS. (full quote)
1212 1)That is NOT the spirit of Christmas. The spirit of Christmas is either you're good, or you're bad and you burn in hell. Who would catch a criminal and let him go free? 2)Republicans? (full quote)
1212 You think everytime I look in the mirror I shout 'Gee, I'm glad I'm me, and not some 20 year old billionaire rock star, with the body of an athlete and a 24 hour erection?! No, I don't! So just excuse the shit out of me!! (full quote)
1212 1)You got any rope, Loyd? 2)No, we don't have any rope. 3)We have bungy cords. (full quote)
1212 1)Cannibal bit you? 2)His name is Cannibal? (full quote)
1212 what am I, the fuckin' circus? 'Take you with me?' (full quote)
7937 Gus: From now on, the only person who gets to yell is me. Why? Because I have a gun. People with guns get to do whatever they want. Married people without guns--for instance--you--DO NOT get to yell. Why? NO GUNS! No guns, no yelling. See? Simple little equation. (full quote)
4694 I kidnapped my fucking parents. (full quote)
9139 what are we girlfriends, do I give a shit about this? (full quote)
9918 1)And just who do you think you are? 2) Slipper socks...medium (full quote)
10289 Great...I've kidnapped my fuc*ing parents. (full quote)
  what smells like piss? (full quote)
  1) what's that smell? 2) shut up! (full quote)
5983 1) You call your patients wackos? 2) Yeah, they, uh, they like it. (full quote)
  (Gus on the phone with the Bartender) Gus: Look, just see if there's a Murray there. Bartender: (to the patrons.) Is there a Murray here? (Into the phone.) I don't think so. Gus: See if there's a waste of fucking life named Murray, try that. Bartender: (to the patrons.) Is there a fucking waste of life named Murray here? Murray: Gussy? Yeah that's me. (full quote)
13838 (GUS)(on the phone)-hi is there a short little drunk loser there. (Bartender)-you just described evrybody in the place. (Gus)-well ask if theres a Murray there.(Bartender)-(to the bar)Is there a Murray here(to the phone)-No murray here pal. (Gus)-Ask if theres a waste of fuckin life named murray there.(Bartender)-Hey is there a fucking waste of life named Murray here (Murray)-Gussy yeah thats me (full quote)
  Caroline-He sounded upset Guz- He should be, he's gonna die a horrible fuckin death (full quote)
  Caroline: How can you be content when I am Miserable? Lloyd: Luck (full quote)
  Dr. Wong: I am not here to judge or take sides...Caroline: Oh, what the hell good are you? (full quote)
  Gus: Lady, if you hit that kid one more time I sware to god I'm gunna take that pigs head shuved it, RIGHT UP YOUR ASS!!! (full quote)
  Jesse: Take me with you. Gus: what is this the fucking circus? Take me with you? (full quote)
19903 He was on the phone and he said Yugoslavia........Yugoslavia?! There is no Yugoslavia anymore......Well anyone in their right mind.....He's not in his right mind! (full quote)
19903 (on the phone) Of course, I'm a little tired after running for TEN HUNDRED FUCKING MILES BECAUSE THERE WAS NO FUCKING CAR WAITING FOR ME!!!!!! (slams phone repeatedly on the counter) (full quote)
  Bob, I nailed your wife. 3 times, Bob. She said you never went 3 times. . .Bob. (full quote)
Waar what are we, girlfriends here? Do I give a shit about this? No. Let's moove. (full quote)
Waar Because the next time I see you, I'm gonna pluck all the hairs out of your balls...one by one, you fucking mule. (full quote)
Waar (Woman#1): where is Dr. Wong? (Woman#2): This is him. (Woman#1): You're a Wong? (White Man): Well, my mother was Irish. (Woman#1): And your father? (White Man): ...wasn't. (full quote)
vanilla You know what I'm going to get you next Christmas, Mom? A big wooden cross, so that every time you feel unappreciated for your sacrifices, you can climb on up and nail yourself to it. (full quote)
20947 Lloyd: Mother! Mom: what? Lloyd: Is it possible for you to shut the fuck up for 10 seconds? Mom: Lloyd! Don't talk to me like that in my own house! Lloyd: You know what, Mom? You knoe what I'm gonna get you for next Christmas? A big wooden cross. So every time you feel unappreciated for all your sacrifices, you can climb on up and nail yourself to it. Mom: Gary! Get my bags. I'm leaving! Connie: Oh, go get 'em yourself. He's not your errand-boy! Mom: Has everyone in this house gone nuts? Who the HELL do you think you are?! Connie: Slipper-socks, MEDIUM! (full quote)
  your husband ain't dead, lady. He's hiding! (full quote)
  Kid - Something like Mapplethorp, except a little more personal. Headmaster - Demon seed! (full quote)
  Gus: You. Saw. The. Stop. Sign. Didn't you Llyod? Lloyd: Yes I did. Gus: Than that makes you a Liar. Big L. Little i. Little a. Little r. Period. Now shut the fuck up. (full quote)
  Caroline: He has the kind of imagination... Lloyd: That the mofia gives scholarships for. ... Dr. Wong: what do you think about the dream Lloyd? Lloyd: I think she should stop telling it at dinner parties. (full quote)
  Santa: You know, Lloyd, Caroline... Every year my wife and I give you a fruitcake, and you never give us a GODDAMN thing. My wife thinks it's because y- ... Hey. You had a gun didn't you? All: No, no. Santa: Yes you did, YES YOU DID, you had a gun! Gus: Okay, look pal. Santa: What, you're pulling a gun on me? I'm not afraid of you! Gus: Look, just calm down. Santa: You think you can take me? I'M SANTA CLAUS! AHHH! (runs at Gus, Gus knocks him out) Gus: Great. I just beat up Santa Claus. (full quote)
  You know what this family needs? A mute. (full quote)
  I had this crazy dream. I was at this fancy restaurant having lunch, the waiter brought me my entree...it was a salad. It was Lloyds head, on a plate of spinach, with his penis sticking out of his ear. And I said, 'I didnt order this' and the waiter said, 'you must try it, its a delicasy...but dont eat the penis, its just a garnish.' (full quote)
  Gus: SIT down! Wowan: Excuse me, but i'm not one of your patients. Gus: You're gonna be someone's patient if you don't get your ass back down into that chair. Kid: Wow! Woman: (hits kid on arm) Gus: I Swear to God, if you hit that kid one more time, i'm gonna stick that pig's head right up you're ass! Woman: Are you going to let him talk to me like that?! Man: The man is a doctor. (full quote)
  great...........i just beat up santa claus. (full quote)
  Caroline: He sounded upset. Gus: He should be. He's gonna die a horrible fuckin death. (doorbell) Caroline: Speaking of which! (full quote)
  I had this crazy dream... I was at this fancy restaurant having lunch, and the waiter brought me my entree. It was a salad. It was Lloyd's head on a plate of spinach, with his penis sticking out of his ear, and I said, I didn't order this. And the waiter said, you must try it, it's a delicacy. But don't eat the penis, it's just garnish. (full quote)
  The truth is, we haven't had sex in quite awhile. And before that, it wasn't all that... umm, what's the word... noteworthy. By our twelfth anniversary, we'd gotten into a pretty stale routine - a couple of kisses, a couple of nipple twists... It would all be over in about the same time it takes to make a cappuccino, I know because I timed it once. (full quote)
  I still say getting laid by an 18-year old line backer is JUST what SHE NEEDS! (full quote)
  Alright, stop! That's it! what the hell is wrong with you people? You're supposed to be a family, how can you talk to each other like that? Let's just go on Oprah and get it over with! Christ! (full quote)
  I'm in Hell. Connecticut is the fifth ring of Hell. (full quote)
  You know what I'm gonna get you next Christmas? A big wooden cross so the when you feel unappreciated for your sacrifices, you can climb on up and nail yourself to it. (full quote)
  Caroline: You know I don't care if I wind up a truck-stop waitress with platinum blonde hair and pineapple earrings. At least I'd be happy, it'd be better than living with a corpse. (full quote)
  I'm in hell.Conneticut is the fifth ring of hell. (full quote)
beekers I'd rather be a truckstop waitress with platinum hair and pineapple earrings, but at least I'd still be alive. (full quote)
beekers The corpse still has the floor! (full quote)
beekers 1: I can't believe it. 2: what? 1: You want to sleep with him! 2: I do not. 1: Use the ouchless, we have bungy cords! (full quote)
20947 Is it possible for you to shut the fuck up for 10 second? (full quote)
20947 Great. I hijacked my FUCKIN' PARENTS. (full quote)
24986 what is the matter with you? I thought Mothers were sweet and nice a-a-and Patient. Your husband ain't dead, lady. He's hiding (full quote)
24986 (1) Mom, the TV's broken. what are we gonna do all night? (2) Celebrate the birth of Christ! (full quote)
24986 Shut up, don't annoy me today, it's Christmas! (full quote)
24986 (1) Did you know you're bleeding? (2) Fuckin' Willard's dog (1) Cannibal bit you?? (2) His name is Cannibal? (full quote)
24986 (1) Got any rope...LOYD? (2) What for? (1) What am I applying for a job? (2) No. (2) Then stop asking me fucking questions! (full quote)
24986 I'm frightened! Humas get frightened because they have feelings. Didn't your Alien leaders tell you that before they sent you here?! (full quote)
24986 Shut up! Don't make me nuts today, it's Christmas! (full quote)
24986 (1) Oh, and more thing- your Christmas wish came true. You are to be out of here effective the day after Christmas. Isn't that a wonderful Noel? (2) Bob, I nailed your wife. Last year after the town meeting. You were in Rhode Island on business. Three times, Bob. She said you never went three times... (full quote)
24986 (1) Got any cigarettes? (2) I don't smoke, and Caroline just quit. (1) Just quit, huh... so, where are they Caroline? (3) what do you mean? (1) Where...are...they...ca..rol...ine? (3) Behind the chess board. (full quote)
24986 1) In the 9th grade, we told him to get a job. Do you know what he did? He started a prostitution ring for the football team and gave out my mother's phone number! (2) And I still say that getting laid by an 18-year old Linebacker is JUST WHAT SHE NEEDS! (full quote)
27369 1)what's your name? 2)Fuck you, that's my name. (full quote)
29417 So you can be what? Someone who takes pictures of lutefisk to prove the nothingness of being? (full quote)
29417 Caroline, the day you see anything through to the end, I'll stick my own dick in my ear. (full quote)
29939 1) Caroline? Why don't you eat something? 2) [Drunk] Loyd? Why don't you eat me? 3) Kids, go to into the den. This not a conversation for children. (full quote)
29939 1) You know what, lady? I'd like to tie you to the back of a fucking truck. 2) You don't have the balls. 3) Don't do it! it's not worth it. 1) I fucking hate her, Lloyd! 3) I know, I know. (full quote)
29939 1) I had this dream... 2) Do we have to do dreams? 3) I'm in this restaurant, and the waiter brings me my entree. It was a salad. It was Lloyd's head on a plate of spinach with his penis sticking out of his ear. And I said, 'I didn't order this.' And the waiter said, 'Oh you must try it, it's a delicacy. But don't eat the penis, it's just garnish.' 3) Lloyd, what do you think about the dream? 2) I think she should stop telling it at dinner parties to all our friends. (full quote)
29939 1) I met this girl and she has a boat. I think she likes me. 2) A girl?! I've been stuck in this house for hours while the police is looking for me and you're fucking dating!? (full quote)
29939 1) Caroline and Loyd, will get the coffee and deserts then we'll be opening presents. 2) We can't open presents til midnight. 1) Why not? 2) Because it's not Christmas until midnight! 1) We'll be changing the rules, a little bit. We are opening the presents now. Not later, now. Why? We're adults, and we can open our presents. WHENEVER WE WANT! (full quote)
42999 What the fuck is wrong with you? I thought moms were supposed to be nice... and sweet an-an-and patient. I know loan sharks that are moer forgiving than you. Your husband ain't dead, lady, he's hiding. (full quote)
42999 #1)Uh, Gussie? #2)what? #1)When are we gonna open presents? #2)Presents? Is that what you said? Presents? I'll tell you what. As soon as we get back, we're gonna open the presents. Matter of fact, I'll tell ya. I'll save you the trouble. Your present is a giant, fuckin' cannon, okay? And when we get back, you're gonna crawl into it, okay? I'm gonna put two pounds of gunpowder in there, I'm gonna light it up, and I'm gonna shoot you right out into fuckin' Jersey, okay? And then I'm gonna steal a car and drive to Jersey and pick up all the little fuckin' pieces of your body, put 'em in a big plastic bag, bring it back to my house, put 'em in the fireplace, light 'em on fire. I'm gonna sit there with a glass of whiskey and watch the charlie brown special with your ashes heatin' my fuckin' house! OH! (full quote)
TyeDi I thought moms we're supposed to be nice, and sweet, and patient. I know loan-sharks that are more forgiving than you. (full quote)
bigclaude (Man Wacking Christmas Tree): Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me, excuse me, excuse me! I belive the corpse still has the floor! (full quote)
alib7923 #1 - Gary the last time you ate her cooking you had diarrhea for a week. #2 - You had diarrhea for a week Dad! #1- That's not appropriate dinner conversation. EAT! (full quote)
kcornibe your husband ain't dead lady, he's hiding! (full quote)
kcornibe You know what I'm going to get you next Christmas, a big wooden cross. So everytime you feel unappreciated for all your sacrifices, you can climb on up and nail yourself to it! (full quote)