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Santa Clause, The - 1994 Movie Quotes

Posted ByQuote
4064 Can we take a direct flight back to reality or do we have to change planes in Denver? (full quote)
4538 When I wake up, I'm getting a CAT scan! (full quote)
4307 1. Charlie, do you know how to dial 911? 2. Sure, 911. (full quote)
4307 1. Charlie, it's just not logical. How can one man in one night visit all the children of the world? 2. Not everyone celebrates Christmas, and I think that there is some kind of time continual to break down what Santa has in his sleigh. (full quote)
4307 1. Scott, what was the last thing that you and Charlie did before you went to bed on Chrismas Eve? 2. We shared a bowl of sugar, some shots of brown liquor, field-dressed a cat, played with my shotguns, looked for women...I read him a book. 1. what book? 2. 'Hollywood Wives'...'The Night Before Christmas'. (full quote)
4307 1. Charlie, I'm sorry that I didn't believe you. 2. That's okay, Neal. You were just denying your inner child. 1. You're going to make a great psychiatrist someday, kid. 2. No, I think that I'm going to go into the family business. (full quote)
7857 Man this turkey's dry. Haven't you people ever heard of basting? (full quote)
  Seeing isn't believing...believeing is seeing. Kid's don't have to see this place to know that it's here. They just...know. (full quote)
8487 We're elves with....attitude. (full quote)
8487 Do you want some hot cocoa? It took me two hundred years to get it right. (full quote)
3225 1)You look good for your age 2) Thanks, but I'm seeing someone in wrapping (full quote)
  Charlie, dont touch those... you dont know where they've been, they all look like they've got key-lime disease or something! (full quote)
  Charlie:Mom, can you come pick me up in the morning? Mom: of course sweetie Charlie: we're talking sun-up youre here? (full quote)
  SC: So if we go straight down this road we'll hit I-94? WHOA (full quote)
  E.L.F.S.: Tinsle- not just for decoration (full quote)
  I'll call you. Is your phone number still 1-800-SPANK-ME? (full quote)
  Scott: You know how to dial 911 don't you Charlie: Yeah, 9-1-1 (full quote)
  Well...we made good time! (full quote)
22841 [ ''White Christmas'' is playing and Scott is reading to Charlie ] Scott: ''...And Mama in her kerchief and I in my cap/had just settled down for a long winters nap/when out on the lawn there arose such a clatter/I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter/away to the window I flew like a flash-- [ Muttering, skipping a few parts ] ...and to all... [ Whispers ] ... a good night''. [ Exits room ] Charlie: What's that? Scott: [ Returns to room ] What's what? Charlie: ''A Rose-suchak-ladder?'' Scott: It's not a ladder, I said ''Arose such a clatter.'' Means, uh... ''Came a big noise.'' Charlie: What? Scott: Charlie, ''arose'' is a word that means ''it came'' and ''clatter is a ''big noise''! (full quote)
  SC: How fast does hair grow? Doctor: Hmm? SC: I shave in the morning, in the afternoon i look like this!! (full quote)
  Scott: you want me to take the toys, go down the chimney, into a strange house, IN MY UNDERWEAR?! (full quote)
  I have homeowner's insurance AND a good attourney. Not as good as my wife's, but let's not open up THAT wound. (full quote)
  Charlie: Niel doesn't believe in Santa Claus. Scott: well, Niel's head comes to a point. (full quote)
  Charlie: Niel's smart. He's a doctor Scott: No he's not. He's a Phyciatrist. (full quote)
  Whoa! This guy was HUGE! (full quote)
  I have pointy SHOES older than you. And I'm not a kid. I'm an elf. (full quote)
22841 [Scott has gone through a small chimney, a fireplace appears, Scott goes down, bumps his head on edge, little girl wakes up from couch ] Little girl: Santa? Scott: Scott Calvin. Little girl: How come your clothes are so baggy? Scott: Because SANTA is watching his saturated fats. Little girl: How come you don't have a beard? Scott: BECAUSE I SHAVED!!! Do you want this doll or not?! Go back to sleep! [He goes to chimney.] Little girl: You're s'posed to drink the milk. Scott: Look, I am lactose intolerant, and I am just about THIS CLOSE to taking those presents back up the chimney! [Mocking little girl.] ''You're s'posed to drink the milk.'' SHUT YOUR EYES! [Little girl does.] Scott: YO! (full quote)
  Well isn't that a pretty picture. Santa rollin' down the block in a Panzer. Well kids i hope you have been good this yea 'cause it looks like Santa just took out the Pearson home. INCOMING! (full quote)
  DR.: Well Scott your as healthy as a horse. SC: yeah, a clydesdale! (full quote)
  dr:if you don't like then diet, and you should DIET!! SC: hahaaha dr: just kiddin (full quote)
  #1.Well now isn't that a pretty picture...Santa rollin down the street in a Panzer.#2Well,I certainly hope u were good this year kids cuz it looks like santa just took out the Pearson home.#3. AHHHH,it's coming! (full quote)
26325 1: You Killed Santa 2: No I didn't (full quote)
  1. Are we on a coffee break? 2. We don't drink coffee. 1. Then I guess the break is over! (full quote)
  A WEENIE WHISTLE! (full quote)
31776 We're elves with attitude (full quote)
  1.) Stung by a bee, Scott? 2.) A big bee... (full quote)
  Charlie : dad how'd that feel? Scott:It felt like America's Most Wanted! (full quote)
  Scott: Well isn't that a pretty picture Santa rollin down the block in a panzer well kids I... I certainly hope you've been good this year because it look's like santa just took out the Pearson home! It's comin (full quote)
  Surprised? If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the cart I couldn't be more surprised. (full quote)
10929 Oh Christmas Tree. (full quote)
  1-800-Spank Me? i know that number.. (full quote)
  Look Barnaby I just want to go home (full quote)
  1.) You going to your mom's for dinner? 2.) Actually were going to be with Neil's family. 1.) AH Christmas at the pound (full quote)
  Dennys... its always open!! (full quote)
  Well, isn’t that a pretty picture. Santa rolling down the block in a panzer. Well kids, I…I certainly hope you’ve been good this year ‘cause it looks like Santa just took out the Pierson house. – Tim Allen/The Santa Clause/1994 (full quote)
  Bernard: Are we on a coffee break? Girl: We don't drink coffee. Bernard: THEN I GUESS THE BREAK IS OVER. (full quote)
10929 We're getting the Disney Channel now. (full quote)
10929 This Christmas the snow hits the fan. (full quote)
10929 I lived through the '60s. (full quote)
10929 White Christmas. (full quote)
10929 Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town. (full quote)
10929 Jingle Bell Ride. (full quote)
10929 Gimme All your Lovin'. (full quote)
10929 Jingle Bells. (full quote)
10929 Christmas Will Return. (full quote)
Marvin Acme #1- Kriss Kringle. #2- Name? #1- Sinter Klas. #2- Name? Santa #1- Pere Noel. Buono Natale. Pelz-Nicole. Topo Gigio. (full quote)
33944 Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night! When I get home, I'm getting a CAT scan! (full quote)
Stephanie 1 - what about the reindeer? Have you ever seen a reindeer fly? 2 - Yes. 1 - Well I haven't. 2 - Have you ever seen a million dollars? 1 - No. 2 - Just because you haven't seen it, doesn't mean it doesn't exist. (full quote)