“- Morgan: What am I supposed to do?
- Dalton: There's always barber college.”
Terry Funk - Morgan
Patrick Swayze - Dalton

“Look, Miss Snit, a girl does not get anywhere by acting intelligent! I mean, take a look at you and me. You chose books, I chose looks. I have a nice house, a wonderful husband and you are slaving away teaching snot-nosed children their ABCs.”
Rhea Perlman - Mrs. Wormwood

“She's so in love with me, she doesn't know anything. That's why she's in love with me.”

Groucho Marx - Dr. Hackenbush

“It's easier to shoot a gun than it is to read a book. It's easier to take a man's life than it is to educate him and teach him about life. It's easier to hate than it is to love. The revolution I'm talking about is a revolution of the mind and the spirit. And education, that's the key.”
Robert Hooks - King David

“Do you want the child to stop with his father who loves him but will bring him up badly, or do you want him to come to Salston, where no-one loves him but he will be brought up well?”
Helena Bonham Carter - Caroline Abbott