Robert Charles Benchley quotes
“Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini?”
“As for me, except for an occasional heart attack, I feel as young as I ever did.”
“I find that, while working, a pipe is a great source of inspiration. A pipe can be placed diagonally across the keys of a typewriter so that they will not function, or it can be made to give out such a cloud of smoke that I cannot see the paper.”
“Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.”
“A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. ”
“Just think of all the things you can do after 40! Professor Webster was 57 when he cut up Dr. Parkman and threw him into the furnace of the Harvard Medical School, and Dr. Parkman was 70 himself!”
“The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.”
“I do most of my work sitting down; that's where I shine.”
“Anything can happen, but it usually doesn't.”
“I have tried to know absolutely nothing about a great many things, and I have succeeded fairly well.”
“An ardent supporter of the hometown team should go to a game prepared to take offense no matter what happens.”
“When I was a child I was of an affectionate disposition, but not enough to get arrested.”
“A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around
three times before lying down.”“Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he
is supposed to be doing.”“Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already
stretched and pulled to such a length that a child cannot do much
harm one way or another.”“Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.”
“Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to
begin with it's just compounding the felony.”“I didn't ought to have went.”
“It was only one of those plays in which the actors,
unfortunately, enunciated very clearly.”“Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.”
Highlights