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- The Parole Officer
“The Parole Officer” quotes
Title The Parole Officer
Plot – A parole officer is accused of a murder he hasn't committed. Evidences are locked up in a bank, so he hires three detainees to rob them.
All actors – Steve Coogan, Emma Gilmour, Susan Jane Tanner, Iain Mitchell, James Smith, Om Puri, Steven Waddington, Ben Miller, Emma Williams, Stephen Dillane, Bruce McGregor, Lena Headey
- Colin: What we don't need is a curly headed wanker trying to be Captain Kirk.
- Simon Garden: At least he got things done. Imagine you looking for Spock in Star Trek 4: "Oh, sorry, we couldn't find him".
- Colin: That was Star Trek 3. It was called "The Search for Spock"!
“- Emma: Is that a gun in your pocket?
- Simon Garden: Uh... no, it's my penis.”
“I saw a man strangle a human being - well, an accountant anyway.”
“You're half-way up a mountain. Crime is the easy path to the bottom. Responsibility is the hard path to the top. But when you get there it's a great view.”
“I won't lay a finger on you. But you'll go to prison. And when those nonces and those perverts get hold of a clever boy like you - and I'll make sure they do - they'll be queueing up round the block. You're going to end up with an arsehole like a clown's pocket.”