“- Colonel Cochrane: Now, we don't play with dolls do we Tyler? Dolls are for girls.
- Tyler: But, Charles is my new best friend.
- Colonel Cochrane: Tyler, you know better than to talk back to a superior officer.”

Dakin Matthews - Colonel Cochrane
Jeremy Sylvers - Tyler

“- Zack: Maybe now's a good time to talk about the rules in my room.
- Crawl: Rules?
- Zack: Rule number 1: Don't touch anything.
- Crawl: And what's rule number 2?
- Zack: There's only one rule. Don't touch anything!”
Patrick Renna - Zack Warner
Pauly Shore - Crawl

“Let's just get the rules straight here. There'll be absolutely no partying in this hall between the hours of 5 and 6 in the morning, without my express written permission. Ok cool. Carry on.”
Pauly Shore - Crawl

“Alright, wait a minute. No drinking, no drugs, no kissing, no tattoos, no piercings, no ritual animal slaughters of any kind. Oh, God, I'm giving them ideas.”

Larry Miller - Walter Stratford

“What are the two house rules? Number One: no dating till you graduate. Number Two: no dating till you graduate.”

Larry Miller - Walter Stratford