“- Billy: You were right. Women are bad, masturbating's good.
- Charlie Anders: No... masturbating's lonely.”
Brendan Fehr - Billy
Max Beesley - Charlie Anders

“Madame, if you continue masturbating my driver, you are going to be a murderer.”

Howard Hesseman - McBride

“- Hannah: Could you have ruined yourself somehow?
- Mickey: How could I ruin myself?
- Hannah: I don't know. Excessive masturbation?
- Mickey: You gonna start knocking my hobbies?”

Mia Farrow - Hannah
Woody Allen - Mickey

“Were you masturbating? You don't have to call it that word if that makes you uncomfortable. You can call it Sam's happy time or
my special alone time with myself.”

Julie White - Judy Witwicky

“- Jeff Davis: Are you busy with something?
- Reanna: I was masturbating.
- Jeff Davis: In the dorms. Well, that's what you get when you go to art school.”
Michael C. Maronna - Jeff Davis
Laura Prepon - Reanna