“Dollars are like small fish: difficult to catch, but not to be thrown back except as bait for something bigger.”
John Lone - Joey Tai

“- Warren Schmidt: Randall, what happened about that investment opportunity? You never called me back.
- Duncan Hertzel: You mean that pyramid scheme?
- Larry Hertzel: Let's not talk about that now.
- Duncan Hertzel: All I know is I lost $800.”
Jack Nicholson - Warren Schmidt
Mark Venhuizen - Duncan Hertzel
Howard Hesseman - Larry Hertzel

“- T.J. Hicks: See this ring? Topaz, my mother's birthstone. Know where I got the money for it?
- Deuce Bigalow: Where?
- T.J. Hicks: Man-whoring! See this keychain? Mini yo-yo. Know where I got the money for it?
- Deuce Bigalow: Man-whoring?
- T.J. Hicks: Stock market! But I got the money for the stock market from man-whoring.”
Eddie Griffin - T.J. Hicks
Rob Schneider - Deuce Bigalow

“- Nicholas Wyatt: Where's my money?
- Adam Cassidy: I used it in market research.”
Gary Leonard Oldman - Nicolas Wyatt
Liam Hemsworth - Adam Cassidy

“There’s this saying in investing. Try not to keep your eggs in the same basket.”
Park Hae-soo - Cho Sang-woo