“My mother says before I was born I was the same as everybody else, better even. My mom says I'm from a place where I'm the smartest person there. Everybody sings.”
Kevin Bacon - Ricky Schroth

I think the biggest difference between men and women is that men are basic. Just basic. There's not a whole lot of frills. That's why, ladies, when you ask a fella a question, the answer you get is, "I don't know." Basic.
Bill Engvall - Himself

“Women aren't human. Look at it like this, women are a different species from men. With different wills and purposes on Earth.”

“- Stan: This is a man's game. It requires a man's cunning, a man's intelligence...
- Katie: With a woman's touch.”

Matthew Faison - Stan
Ann Ryerson - Katie

“Do you know why women are able to train us? They are smarter than us. It ain't that big a deal. That's saying you're smarter than a creature who every time it takes its underwear off tries to catch them with its toes, flip them in the air, and catch them with its hand.”
Jeff Foxworthy - Jeff Foxworthy