“- Andie: So what do you want to drink?
- Duckie: Oh you know, beer, scotch, juice box... whatever.”
Molly Ringwald - Andie
Jon Cryer - Duckie

“- Jeff Dunham: What's your favorite beer?
- Bubba J.: An open one.
- Jeff Dunham: How do you know when you drink too much?
- Bubba J.: I run out.”
Jeff Dunham - Himself
Jeff Dunham - Bubba J.
Jeff Dunham

“Maybe I should just pick up that bottle and veg out with you, ignore everything going on around me by getting good and loaded.”
Heather Langenkamp - Nancy Thompson

“- Young Deborah: What are you doing?
- Young Noodles: Give me a drink.
- Young Deborah: We're closed. Nice people don't drink on Pesach, they go to the synagogue.”
Jennifer Lynn Connelly - Young Deborah
Scott Schutzman Tiler - Young Noodles

“- Customs Officer: Do you have a drinking problem, Mr Brown?
- Jamie Shannon: I thought there might be a problem with the water.”

Olu Jacobs - Customs Officer
Christopher Walken - Jamie Shannon