“- Ray Brown: What's that they say about the love of a good woman?
- Jane Goodale: That once offered, it's guaranteed to come back and bite her in the ass.”
Greg Kinnear - Ray Brown
Ashley Judd - Jane Goodale

“- Duckie: You know what an older women does for me?
- Iona: Changes your diapers?
- Duckie: Touché.”
Jon Cryer - Duckie
Annie Potts - Iona

“Why don't you just focus on girls and cars? Works of me.”
Rob Lowe - Sodapop Curtis

“Don't go mistaking paradise for a pair of long legs.”
Mary Stuart Masterson - Watts

“- Doug Remer: We win, and they get the chicks. That sucks, dude.
- Joe Cooper: I'm telling you, it's jobs. We gotta get jobs. Then we get the khakis. Then we get the chicks.”
Matt Stone - Doug Remer
Trey Parker - Joe Cooper