“- Billy: You were right. Women are bad, masturbating's good.
- Charlie Anders: No... masturbating's lonely.”
Brendan Fehr - Billy
Max Beesley - Charlie Anders

“I would like to make an announcement. There is a gorgeous woman masturbating on my bed.”
Jason Biggs - Jim Levenstein

“We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.”
Lily Tomlin

“- J.B. Armstrong: Sorry, I didn't know you were a woman.
- Tugboat Annie: I've been a woman for a long time. But, I'm still the best tugboat man on the coast - and that's putting it mild.”

Clarence Kolb - J.B. Armstrong
Marjorie Rambeau - Tugboat Annie

“Remember, my child, that the woman is the root and the man is the tree. The tree grows only as high as the root is strong.”

Walter Huston - Ling Tan