“They're perfect. Don't matter if they're skinny, fat, blond or blue. If a woman is willing to give you her love, Harvard, it's the greatest gift in the world. Makes you taller, makes you smarter, makes your teeth shine. Boy, oh, boy, women are perfect.”
Joe Pesci - Simon Wilder

“- Nikki Downing: Look at her. Isn't she perfect?
- Harry Crumb: Well, I wouldn't say perfect. I mean, look at the size of her head. She must be enormous. But easy to find.”
Shawnee Smith - Nikki Downing
John Candy - Harry Crumb

“[as Gammy Num-Nums] We don't want to go anywhere with you, Melon Head!”
Dana Carvey - Pistachio Disguisey

“That's right monkey, play my head!”
Peter Dante - Dante

“Now this is my idea of an ass bandit. Wait till some of the local girls get a look at you, scrotum head.”

Louis Gossett Jr. - Sgt. Emil Foley