“- Jodi Chang: Assblasters. How's that?
- Jack: Sounds like a porno film.”

Susan Chuang - Jodi Chang
Shawn Christian - Desert Jack Sawyer

“- Maxxx Orbison: They're the Assfuck Twins.
- Joe Young: Couldn't I call them the Naughty Twins or something?
- Maxxx Orbison: No, you couldn't just call them the Naughty Twins. They're the Assfuck Twins. Why would you call them The Naughty Twins when they get fucked in the ass all the time?”

Michael Dean Jacobs - Maxxx Orbison
Trey Parker - Joe Young

“- Interviewer: What's the difference between Orgazmo and your previous porn titles, like Schindler's Fist?
- Maxxx Orbison: I really think history will describe Orgazmo better than I possibly could.”
Ben Patrick Johnson - Interviewer
Michael Dean Jacobs - Maxxx Orbison

- Bletch: Have you thought of a name for it, yet?
- Trevor the Rat: I was thinking along the lines of..."Dennis does Daisy".
- Bletch: No. That's lousy.
- Trevor the Rat: How about..."Anal Antics"?
- Bletch: "Anal Antics"... yes. It will appeal to the intellectuals. Do you think it will do as well as our last release and win the Hooker Prize?
Peter Vere-Jones - Bletch
Brian Sergent - Trevor the Rat

“- Calvin: Don't forget: stay out of the adult bookstore.
- Adam: Adult bookstore. Why?
- Calvin: Poison gas. Invisible.”
Christopher Walken - Calvin
Brendan Fraser - Adam