- Julian: Call it something catchy, "Reluctant Tourist", and you are the fella to write it.
- Macon: But, I hate to travel.
- Julian: I thought so. So, do businessmen. I mean these folks would rather be at home in their living rooms. So, you will be helping them to pretend that that's where they are.

Bill Pullman - Julian
William Hurt - Macon

“This book will change how people write.”
Bob Balaban - William Shawn

“When I get home I shall write a book about this place... If I ever do get home.”
Kathryn Beaumont - Alice in Wondeland

“It's been a long time since someone wrote a really good book in jail.”
Michael Douglas - Prof. Grady Tripp

“- Terry Crabtree: Naturally you have copies.
- Prof. Grady Tripp: I have an alternate version of the first chapter.”

Robert Downey Jr. - Terry Crabtree
Michael Douglas - Prof. Grady Tripp