Bob Balaban quotes
“You’re a fucking moron.”
“- Morris Weissman: How do you manage to put up with these people?
- Ivor Novello: Well, you forget, I make my living impersonating them.”
“Gino, you and I know you're a whore. Just a poor old whore who bellies up for any crook with two bucks. A whore and a thief. As far as I'm concerned you only have two options. You cooperate with us, you make the calls, or you go to jail with the other thieves. I don't even want to think about the third option.”
“She was overly protective. I just like to think she cared about me. I was a member of the chess team and whenever we would have chess tournaments I had to wear a protective helmet. Maybe she thought that we might have fallen maybe and impaled our heads on a pointy bishop or something.”
“HAL was told to lie, by people who find it easy to lie. HAL doesn't know how.”
“- Winton Chalmers: Life's a bitch.
- Del Blaine: He didn't drown, if that makes life any less bitchy.”
“- HAL 9000: I understand now, Dr. Chandra. Thank you for telling me the truth.
- Dr. R. Chandra: You deserve it.”
“Whether we are based on carbon or silicon makes no fundamental difference. We should each be treated with appropriate respect.”
“- Elvin Clyde: Who did you go as?
- Peter Appleton: A horny young man.”
“She's British, isn't she? She sounds British. Is she, like, affected or is she British?”
“Do you like sex and travel?”
“- Morris Weissman: You're providing a lot of entertainment for nothing.
- Ivor Novello: Morris... I'm used to it.”
“- Harry Block: This guy is too old for her.
- Richard: He's younger than you are.
- Harry Block: Hey, I'm much too old for her, it's ridiculous. But, because of my immaturity I have a boyish quality that works.”
“It's the recipes that you create yourself that are the best.”
“If I were you I'd give AA some thought. Alcoholism is a disease, you know.”
“If you hang yourself, I'll kill you.”
“- Constance: How horrid. And who turns out to have done it?
- Morris Weissman: Oh, I couldn't tell you that. It would spoil it for you.
- Constance: Oh, but none of us will see it.”