“- Doug Remer: That's a dude.
- Squeak Scolari: No way, you're just saying that because you want her for yourself.
- Doug Remer: No dude, I'm saying that because she's a guy.
- Squeak Scolari: That's impossible. Just look at her. She's got the cutest little upturned nose, the softest lips. The sweetest Adam's apple.”
Trey Parker - Doug Remer
Dian Bachar - Squeak Scolari

“- Fergus: The thing is, Dil, you're not a girl.
- Dil: Details, baby. Details.”

Stephen Rea - Fergus
Jaye Davidson - Dil

“His total lack of masculinity, I mean his weak chin and soft underbelly bothers you not a bit?”

Mel Gibson - Kurt

“- Malcolm: How do you know they can't breed?
- Wu: Because all the animals in Jurassic Park are female. We've engineered them that way.”
Jeff Goldblum - Malcolm
BD Wong - Wu

“- Surplus Store Owner: Why don't they call you guys officer-esses?
- Sandra: I beg your pardon?
- Surplus Store Owner: Like actress. Something to signify... you know.
- Sandra: I guess they feel a police officer is a police officer. Not a... you know.
- Surplus Store Owner: Okay then. Sorry I couldn't have been helpful, officer-ess.”
Frederic Forrest - Surplus Store Owner
Rachel Ticotin - Sandra