“Cheating on a quiz show? That's sort of like plagiarizing a comic strip.”
Paul Scofield - Mark Van Doren

“There's a wonderful and exciting world out there when we discover we don't needTV to entertain us.”
Mike Judge - Mr. Van Driessen

“You know what that is, television? It's entertainment for people. It's fake! Nothing you think is real is real!”

Susie Essman - Mittens

“- Megan: Cheers are supposed to be simple, make people feel good.
- Graham: Cheers make girls do stupid cartwheels. Orgasms make people feel good.”
Natasha Lyonne - Megan
Clea DuVall - Graham

“- Gwen DeMarco: We shouldn't have to do this! It makes no logicalsense! Why is it here?
- Jason Nesmith: Because it's on the televisionshow.
- Gwen DeMarco: Well, forget it! I'm not doing it! This episode was badly written!”
Sigourney Weaver - Gwen DeMarco
Tim Allen - Jason Nesmith