“- Trent: Yeah, two's enough not to look anxious. But I think three days is kind of money. You know because you...
- Mike: Yeah, but you know what, mabey I'll wait 3 weeks. How's that? And tell her I was cleaning out my wallet and I just happened to run into her number.”

Vince Vaughn - Trent
Jon Favreau - Mike

“Man, hurry up, bitch. I got lots of shit to do. Shit. If that bitch doesn't hurry up and get here, I'll have to wait some more.”

Cheech Marin - Cheech

“You're 40-years-old, you're four times as old as this girl, and you can't marry her, so you wait five years. By that time the little girl's 15 and you're 45. You're only three times as old as that little girl. So you wait 15 years and when the girl is 30, you're at 60. You're only twice as old as that little girl.”

Bud Abbott - Slicker Smith

“- Herbie Brown: She'll have to wait for me!
- Slicker Smith: Why should she wait for you?
- Herbie Brown: I was nice enough to wait for her!”

Lou Costello - Herbie Brown
Bud Abbott - Slicker Smith

“- American Immigration Official: The Romanian quota is very small, very crowded.
- Georges Iscovescu: That means I have to wait?
- American Immigration Official: Between five and eight years, Mr. Iscovescu.”
Harry Shannon - American Immigration Official
Charles Boyer - Georges Iscovescu