“- Irv: Dig where I'm coming from. I'm coming from two gold medals. I'm coming from nine world records in both the two and four-man events. I'm coming from ten years of intense competition with the best athletes in the world.
- Sanka Coffie: That's a hell of a place to be coming from!”
John Candy - Irv
Doug E. Doug - Sanka Coffie

“Do you think it's important for a first baseman to be left-handed?”
Kaley Cuoco - Karin Carter

- Jeannine: Conrad, I'm not a very good bowler, what I mean is, I'm a funny bowler.
- Conrad "Con" Jarrett: Oh, well we don't have to go bowling if you'd rather not. How funny are ya?
- Jeannine: On a scale of one to ten... about a ten.
- Conrad "Con" Jarrett: Oh... yeah, that's pretty funny.
Elizabeth McGovern - Jeannine
Timothy Hutton - Conrad

“- Nubie: You always run the ball! Why can't I run the ball?
- Hanon: Because you're slow, and no one likes you.”
Matthew McCurley - Nubie
Troy Simmons - Hanon

“- Josh: I'm much better at video hockey.
- Paul: That's not a sport.
- Josh: It requires hand and eye coordination.
- Paul: It's not a sport if you don't sweat.”
Tom Hanks - Josh
John Heard - Paul