“Horror movies turn on chicks faster than porno.”
Ashton Kutcher - Michael Kelso

“- Senator Jummy Simpson: I've seen that girl somewhere before.
- Liza Prescott: She's a very particular friend of the director who's making this picture. He sticks her in every scene he can.”

Walter Kingsford - Senator Jummy Simpson
Billie Burke - Liza Prescott

“My eyes still hurt from reading that movie.”

Eddie Murphy - Insp. Scott Roper

“- Emily Montgomery: I've seen all your movies.
- Cameron Drake: Both of them?”
Joan Cusack - Emily Montgomery
Matt Dillon - Cameron Drake

“- Danny Madigan: Where are the ordinary, everyday women? They don't exist because this is a movie!
- Jack Slater: No, this is California.”
Austin O'Brien - Danny Madigan
Arnold Schwarzenegger - Jack Slater