“- Dr. Einstein: I cannot operate without a drink!
- Jonathan Brewster: Pull yourself together, doctor!
- Dr. Einstein: I cannot pull myself together without a drink!”
Peter Lorre - Dr. Einstein
Raymond Massey - Jonathan Brewster

“You know how to make a RedEye?”
Bryan Brown - Doug Coughlin

“- Bung: Do I detect the unmistakable tang of Ye Olde Tiger?
- Harry: Bung, you could sniff out a can of beer from half a mile away.
- Bung: Just one of my many talents.”
John Hargreaves - Bung
Graham Kennedy - Harry

“Only a drunken, infantile idiot shoots himself over love, not an internist.”
Woody Allen - Andrew

“- Jack Withrowe: Tell me to my face you don't love me.
- Page Conners: I don't love you.
- Jack Withrowe: Wow. More believable than I thought it would be.”
Jason Lee - Jack Withrowe
Jennifer Love Hewitt - Page Conners