“- Louis Stevens: Oh... mother of pearl, Beans!
- Bernard 'Beans' Aranguren: Sorry! I'm a little gassy in the morning!”

Shia LaBeouf - Louis Stevens
Steven Anthony Lawrence - Bernard 'Beans' Aranguren

“If I didn't have puke breath, I'd kiss you.”
Rick Moranis - Bob McKenzie

“- Uncle Julius: You've changed, no doubt about that.
- Sybylla Melvyn: You haven't. Your kisses still smell of whiskey and cigars.
- Uncle Julius: That's what makes me irresistible.”

Peter Whitford - Uncle Julius
Judy Davis - Sybylla Melvyn

“- Photographer: I wonder if I could have just a little bit more of your smile?
- Johnnie Aysgarth: Oh not at this hour of the morning.”
Clyde Cook - Photographer
Cary Grant - Johnnie Aysgarth

“- Dr. Paul Abbot: Thank you for a lovely evening, Kate, shall we see you in the morning?
- Aunt Kate: Who knows if any of us will ever see the morning?”
Paul L. Smith - Dr. Paul Abbot
Dom DeLuise - Aunt Kate