“Not that I'm complaining, but I usually don't like my filth this clean!”

Tom Hanks - Rick Gassko

No more complaining. No more "Mr. Kimble, I have to go the bathroom". Nothing!
[shouts]
There is no bathroom!

Arnold Schwarzenegger - Kimble

- Ed Harken: A lot of you have been hearing the affiliates complaining about a lack of diversity on the news team.
- Champ Kind: What in the hell's diversity?
- Ron Burgundy: Well, I could be wrong, but I believe "diversity" is an old, old wooden ship that was used during the Civil War era.
Fred Willard - Ed Harken
David Koechner - Champ Kind
Will Ferrell - Ron Burgundy

“- Woman on Plane: Would you please stop hitting the back of my chair? I am trying to sleep!
- Clifford Daniels: I'm sorry, Miss Nice Older Person, but I don't know what you're talking about. Perhaps you were just having a nightmare about your early days in the circus.”

Brandis Kemp - Woman on Plane
Martin Hayter Short - Clifford Daniels

“- Miranda: Ummm that was incredible. Was it good for you?
- Fletcher Reede: I've had better.”

Amanda Donohoe - Miranda
Jim Carrey - Fletcher Reede