“- Tom Roberts: Miss, you don't understand. See, this is an emergency.
- Norma: Animal, vegetable, or mineral?
- Tom Roberts: Sexual.”

Vincent Van Patten - Tom Roberts
Terry Soda - Norma

“- Col. Tom Carlsen: It was the hardest thing I ever did.
- Dr. Bukovsky: We understand. It must have taken great courage to try and...
- Col. Tom Carlsen: No, you don't understand. Part of me didn't want to leave. She killed all my friends and I still didn't want to leave. Leaving her was the hardest thing I ever did.”
Steve Railsback - Col. Tom Carlsen
Michael Gothard - Dr. Bukovsky

“- Calvin: These are stock certificates. They denote ownership in a company.
- Adam age 11: Those look pretty. May I see them?
- Calvin: Sure. They are yours. Your mother and I bought these for you before you were born to give you some money to help you out in your adult years. Unfortunately, they are all worthless now.”
Christopher Walken - Calvin
Douglas Smith - Adam age 11

“- White Goodman: My gym is worth more than four million dollars, your gym isn't even worth four. My gym has stockholders, your gym doesn't even have cup holders.
- Peter La Fleur: Why would I want cup holders?”
Ben Stiller - White Goodman
Vince Vaughn - Peter La Fleur

“- Ira Lowenstein: Great game, Jimmy. I especially liked that move in the seventh inning when you scratched your balls for an hour.
- Jimmy Dugan: Well, anything worth doing is worth doing right.”
David Strathairn - Ira Lowenstein
Tom Hanks - Jimmy Dugan