“- Chris: What am I afraid of her for? She's no rocket scientist.
- C.D. Bales: Well, actually, she is a rocket scientist.”

Rick Rossovich - Chris
Steve Martin - C. D. Bales

“Collegegirls have three times more sexual partners than a regular girl.”
Gary Wolf - Snake

- "Booger": Big deal! Did you get in her pants?
- Gilbert: She's not that kind of girl, Booger.
- "Booger": Why? Does she have a penis?

Curtis Armstrong - "Booger"
Anthony Edwards - Gilbert

“When a girl tells you how many guys she's slept with, multiply it by three and that's the real number. Didn't you fuckers learn anything in college?”
Seann William Scott - Stifler

“- Danny: Well you know, these girls are only good for one thing.
- Sonny: Yeah, what are you suppose to do with them the rest of the 23 hours and 45 minutes of the day?”
John Travolta - Danny
Michael Tucci - Sonny