“- Jesse Montgomery III: Dude, you got a tattoo.
- Chester Greenburg: So do you, dude!
- Chester Greenburg: So then what does mine say?
- Jesse Montgomery III: Sweet! What does mine say?
- Chester Greenburg: Dude! What does mine say?”
“Dude, Where's My Car?” quotes(2000)
Plot – Jesse and Chester wake up in the countryside after a night of fun and cannot remember where they've parked their car. Looking for it, they bump into their girlfriends Wanda and Wilma, who are angry with them because the guys reduced the house a mess, a group of hooligans, a stripper who harasses them because of a suitcase full of stolen money and some aliens dressed up as humans, who are looking for a device that can decide the fate of the world.
All actors – Ashton Kutcher, Seann William Scott, Jennifer Garner, Marla Sokoloff, Kristy Swanson, David Herman, Hal Sparks, Charlie O'Connell, John Toles-Bey, Christian Middelthon, David Bannick, Turtle, Bob Clendenin, Mary Lynn Rajskub, Kevin Christy, Kristoffer Ryan Winters, Bill Chott, Michael Bower, John Melendez, Teressa Tunney, Linda Porter, Freda Foh Shen, Mitzi Martin, Nichole Hiltz, Linda Kim, Mia Trudeau, Kimmarie Johnson, Keone Young, Christopher Darga, Marc Lynn, Pat Finn, Cleo King, Cinco Paul, Brendan Hill, Jona Kai Jacobsen, Jodi Ann Paterson, Dwight Armstrong, Claudine Barros, Richard Johnson, Galvin Chapman, Joanna Bacalso, Katherine Baker, Tabitha Taylor, Misty Atkinson, Veronica Gomez, Melissa Burleson, Annette Pursley, Melissa Copen, Linda Maria Balver, Cheryl Tsai, Erik Aude, Ryan Christian, Blaise Fitzgerald, William H. Gray, Sydney, Fabio, Michael Beardsley, Dominic Capone, Alex Cong, Steven Derek, Andy Dick, Anthony L. Fuller Jr., Joyce Giraud, José Gonzales, Geoffrey Gould, Al Kenders, Kyle Nudo, Gary Rodriguez, Brent Spiner, Banzai Vitale, Michael Shamus Wilesshow all
“Dude, Where's My Car?” Quotes 13 quotes
“- Chester Greenburg: Look, a unicorn!
[Mr. Pizzacoli looks]
- Mr. Pizzacoli: A unicorn?
- Chester Greenburg: Sorry, I guess it was just a regular horse.”
“- Jesse Montgomery III: Wait a second. I just got a really bad feeling in the pit of my stomach.
- Chester Greenburg: Maybe you should go sit on the toilet?
- Jesse Montgomery III: No. No. You know what the feeling is? It's love!”
“Dude, it's a llama!”
“- Tania: I'm a gender-challenged male.
- Jesse Montgomery III: What does that mean?
[Tania reveals her penis]
- Jesse Montgomery III: Whoa! Dude, you're a dude!”
“- Jesse Montgomery III: Who's Johnny Potsmoker?
- Chester Greenburg: Oh, that's my alter ego.
- Jesse Montgomery III: Wait, I thought Johnny Potsmoker was my alter ego.
- Chester Greenburg: No. Yours is Smokey McPot.”
“- Jesse Montgomery III: Dude, this is an emergency!
- Chester Greenburg: So is this, dude. It's a break-dancing stripper emergency!”
“- Jesse Montgomery III: You know what we should do?
- Chester Greenburg: Eat?
- Jesse Montgomery III: No.
[thinks for a moment]
- Jesse Montgomery III: Eat!”
“- Chester Greenburg: How wasted were we last night?
- Jesse Montgomery III: Well, I touched Christy Boner's hoo-hoo, were on the hook for two hundred thousand dollars to a transsexual stripper, and my car's gone. I'd say we were pretty wasted.”
“- Mr. Pizzacoli: A trained dolphin could do a better job than you two!
- Jesse Montgomery III: Yeah, but then the pizzas would get all wet.”
“- Jesse Montgomery III: Nelson, your dog's a stoner!
- Chester Greenburg: Can he also bong a beer?
- Nelson: Nah, all he does is pretty much lie around and smoke his pipe.”
“- Jesse Montgomery III: Hey, have you seen my car?
- Christie Boner: Well, I saw it last night. I mean, I saw the backseat...
- Jesse Montgomery III: [oblivious] No, I'm talking about the whole thing.”