“- Tito: Allow me to introduce myself: I am Ignacio Alonso Julio Federico de Tito.
- Georgette: Get away from me, you little bug-eyed creep!”
Cheech Marin - Tito
Bette Midler - Georgette

“- Clark Griswold: Could I do your back, honey?
- Ellen Griswold: I've already done my back.
- Clark Griswold: Could I do your front?
- Ellen Griswold: Go do your own front.”
Chevy Chase - Clark Griswold
Beverly D'Angelo - Ellen Griswold

“- Latrell Spencer: Oh the deception. The betrayal. Man you deceived me.
- Marcus Copeland: Look man.
- Latrell Spencer: Negro please. Didn't any one tell you that this was an all white party, huh? Someone get this jiggaboo away from me.”
Terry Crews - Latrell Spencer
Marlon Wayans - Marcus Copeland

“- Miss Millie: Your children are so clean. Would you like to work for me, be my maid?
- Sofia: Hell no.”
Dana Ivey - Miss Millie
Oprah Winfrey - Sofia

“- Dr. Austin Sloper: How is it possible to protect such a willing victim?
- Lavinia Penniman: You will kill her if you deny her this marriage.
- Dr. Austin Sloper: You forget I'm a doctor. People don't die of such things.”

Ralph David Richardson - Dr. Austin Sloper
Miriam Hopkins - Lavinia Penniman