“After a long day of doing nothing, it's good to kick back.”
Ernie Sabella - Pumbaa

“I know you don't smoke weed, I know this; but I'm gonna get you high today, 'cause it's Friday, you ain't got no job... and you ain't got shit to do.”
Chris Tucker - Smokey

- Sheriff Hank Dawson: So, where's your uglier half?
- A.J. "Stoney" Stoneman: I left him out there to deal with Martinez.
- Sheriff Hank Dawson: I'm gonna have to drag my ass all the way up there to investigate a double homicide?
- A.J. "Stoney" Stoneman: A man can't sit around all day drinking coffee.
Keith Carradine - Sheriff Hank Dawson
Peter Fonda - A.J. "Stoney" Stoneman

“- Helen Cooper: Some people smoke pot, some people bungee jump, some people chant. What do you do to be happy?
- Jessica Stein: Nothing. I'm not.”
Heather Juergensen - Helen Cooper
Jennifer Westfeldt - Jessica Stein

“- Lucifer: I gotta burn off these calories fast, before I blow up. Let's go rollerblading or something. You wanna come along, Dark?
- Dark: I'd rather have my ball hairs burned off with an acetylene torch!”
Kathleen Robertson - Lucifer
James Duval - Dark