“- Joey Naylor: Dad, why is the American government the best government?
- Nick Naylor: Because of our endless appeals system.”
Adam Brody - Joey Naylor
Aaron Eckhart - Nick Naylor

What makes America the best government? The passion that doesn't exist anywhere else in the world. Sure you call it "capitalism", "free market", "celebration of tariff breakdowns". I have another word for it: love.
Cameron Bright - Joey Naylor

“- Judy Witwicky: I think that if there really was some kind of alien infestation the Government would be the first to tell us.
- Ron Witwicky: This is America.
- Judy Witwicky: That's how we know we're in a free country. There's no secrets.”
Julie White - Judy Witwicky
Kevin Dunn - Ron Witwicky

“- Skip: Man, one thing I can't figure out. People be out of work everywhere and the government just be throwing money away!
- Kirby: That's Uncle Sam for you, son. Money to burn.”
Chris Tucker - Skip
Keith David - Kirby

“It's not your fault you've been brainwashed by America.”

N'Bushe Wright - Delilah Benson