- Justin McLeod: Think, Norstadt. Reason. Have I ever abused you? Did I ever lay a hand on you of anything but friendship on you? Could I? Could you imagine me ever doing so? And what about the past?
- Charles E. "Chuck" Norstadt: Just tell me you didn't do it. I'll believe you.
Mel Gibson - Justin McLeod
Nick Stahl - Charles E. "Chuck" Norstadt

“- Maxwell Smart: Guys, you have to believe me I am not a double agent.
- Lloyd: We never thought you were.
- Bruce: Yeah, we love you, man.”
Steve Carrell - Maxwell Smart
Nate Torrence - Lloyd
Masi Oka - Bruce

It's like I always say: "You can't trust a fake brother".
Matthew Lawrence - Victor

“Cindy, you know by tattling on your friends, you're really just tattling on yourself. By tattling on your friends, you're just telling them that you're a tattletale. Now is that the tale you want to tell?”
Gary Cole - Mike Brady

“- Lt. Steven Hauk: The former V.P. is a good man and a decent man.
- Gen. Taylor: Bullshit! I know Nixon personally. He lugs a trainload of shit behind him that could fertilize the Sinai. Why, I wouldn't buy an apple from the son of a bitch, and I consider him a good, close personal friend.”
Bruno Kirby - Lt. Steven Hauk
Noble Willingham - Gen. Taylor