“- God: You've earned enough credits to get you into Heaven.
- Steve Brooks: Oh, thank God.
- God, God: You're welcome.”
Richard Provost - God
Perry King - Steve Brooks

“Take things easy and you live a little longer.”
Edward G. Robinson - Little John Sarto

“You have the blood of the Hidalgos in your veins! Keep it cool, my girl, or I'll whisk you off into a convent!”

Gale Sondergaard - Inez Quintero

“- Dr. John Dolittle: You need to relax your mind...
- Compulsive Dog: You're the person. You throw the ball. I'm the dog. I get it.”
Eddie Murphy - Dr. John Dolittle
Gilbert Gottfried - Compulsive Dog

“I moved here and I thought, Great! I'm outta the big city and I'm finally in a place where everybody isn't gonna be crawling up everybody's asshole every day! A place where maybe my biggest nightmare is going to be getting some goddamn cat out of a tree! But forget that! Everybody is insane, everywhere!”
Ed Harris - Sheriff Alan Pangborn