“- Carter: All I did was invite them to have a drink.
- Lee: You invited them to get naked and sacrifice a small goat.
- Carter: Which word was 'goat'?”

Chris Tucker - Carter
Jackie Chan - Lee

- Judge Cotton: Does this guy "Candy" Johnson bother you, my dear?
- Elizabeth Cotton: Not half as much as I bother him.
Frank Morgan - Judge Cotton
Lana Turner - Elizabeth Cotton

- Jean: I don't see why I have to do all the dirty work. There must be plenty of rich old dames just waiting for you to push them around.
- "Colonel" Harrington: You find them, I'll push them.
Barbara Stanwyck - Jean
Charles Coburn - "Colonel" Harrington

“You could melt her heart right down to butter, if you'd only turn on the heat!”

Louise Beavers - Mamie

“Is that your real hair or did you scalp an angel?”

Bob Hope - Larry Haines