“- Mrs. Topper: I think its ridiculous for a man of your age to pursue young girls. What will the neighbors think?
- Cosmo Topper: I didn't pursue them, Clara. They forced themselves on me.
- Mrs. Topper: Don't be absurd! Imagine girls, pretty girls, forcing themselves on a paunchy, middle-aged man.”
Billie Burke - Mrs. Topper
Roland Young - Cosmo Topper

“- Alberto Granado: It is rumored that Chilean girls are the most daring on the continent.
- Ernesto Guevara de la Serna: Rumors have no scientific value, Dr. Granado. Time to do some research.”
Rodrigo De la Serna - Alberto Granado
Gael García Bernal - Ernesto Guevara de la Serna

“- Scott: I don't know. I don't think she's your type.
- John Tucker: Girl is my type.
- Scott: Alright, well then maybe you're not her type. She's into stuff like old school Elvis Costello, she listens to obscure podcasts, she reads Dave Eggers. You know, she's deep, man.
- John Tucker: Dude, I'm deep. I'm dating the poetry club.”

Penn Badgley - Scott
Jesse Metcalfe - John Tucker

“You know the kind of woman that just screams trouble? You see her, and every warning bell in your brain starts going off, but you still manage to ask for her number? Well, that's all I ever hook up with.”
Ryan Reynolds - Hannibal King

“Come on Harry, the maiden fair waits for her knight in shining corduroy.”

Leslie William Nielsen - Richard Vickers