Leslie William Nielsen quotes
“Who are you and how did you get in here?' 'I'm a locksmith. And I'm a locksmith'.”
“Doing nothing is very hard to do... you never know when you're finished.”
“I played a lot of leaders, autocratic sorts; perhaps it was my Canadian accent.”
“I usually specialize in stuff you can wrap.”
“- Dr. Rumack: What was it we had for dinner tonight?
- Elaine Dickinson: Well, we had a choice of steak or fish.
- Dr. Rumack: Yes, yes, I remember, I had lasagna.”
“The reason they call it 'golf' is that all the other 4 letter words were used up.”
“Yes, it's true, I've been called the Laurence Olivier of spoofs. I guess that would make Laurence Olivier the Leslie Nielsen of Shakespeare.”
“I really have to keep an eye on myself, because sometimes I think I might say something important.”
“The reason there's a question mark on my front door is just in case I forget my address.”
“I like that kind of 'straight-faced' comedy. I like to be straight-faced and outrageous.”
“- Lt. Frank Drebin: Gimme the strongest thing you got.... On second thought, how about a black Russian?
- Waiter: Very well sir.”
“Look, baby. I am what I am, and I do what I do. A few guys make shoelaces, some lay sod, others make a very good living neutering animals. I'm a cop!”
“Like a midget at a urinal, I was going to have to stay on my toes.”
“- Commissioner Brumford: Ladies and gentlemen, I would now like to introduce a most special American. Tonight, he is being honoured for his 1000th drug-dealer killed.
- Lt. Frank Drebin: Thank you. But, in all honesty, the last three I backed over with my car. Luckily, they turned out to be drug-dealers.”
“I've finally found someone I can love, a good, clean love... without utensils.”