“My dad died when he was 39. Hodgkins. My grandfather, my uncle, same thing. None of 'em made it past the age of 45 so I'm gonna live my life the way I want! Why don't you get off my back. Call your wife, go cry to her about it.”

Thomas Jane - Mickey Mantle

“Maybe I'm spending too much of my time starting up clubs and putting on plays. I should probably be trying harder to score chicks. That's the only thing anybody really cares about. But, it's not my forte, unfortunately.”
Jason Schwartzman - Max Fischer

“Sometimes all it takes is a split second for you to do something you'll regret the whole rest of your life.”
Kevin Costner - Stephen Simmons

“There's really no point in doing anything in life because it's all over in the blink of an eye, and the next thing you know, rigor mortis sets in.”
Ralph Fiennes - M. Gustave

“- Geoff Montgomery: It's worse than horrible because a zombie has no will of his own. You see them sometimes walking around blindly with dead eyes, following orders, not knowing what they do, not caring.
- Larry Lawrence: You mean like Democrats?”
Richard Carlson - Geoff Montgomery
Bob Hope - Larry Lawrence