“- Junior: Daddy, I like this place. All the 'gators and snakes and stuff. Why don't we move down here?
- Buford T. Justice: Why don't you move down here?
- Junior: Oh no, Daddy, I ain't never leavin' home, that's a promise.
- Buford T. Justice: Don't you ever, ever threaten yo' daddy like that again!”
Mike Henry - Junior
Jackie Gleason - Sheriff Buford T. Justice

“- Marylin Rexroth: You didn't ask me here to pick me up? You could be disbarred for that.
- Miles Massey: Maybe I'm reckless.”
Catherine Zeta-Jones - Marylin
George Clooney - Miles

“There's a psycho killer on the loose and you wanna go traipsing around this gigantic mansion? Have you ever actually seen the Stab movies? Every time this dude enters a room he ends up a god damn shishkabob!”

Deon Richmond - Tyson Fox

“Only a human would think riding through an army encampment could work.”
Paul Giamatti - Limbo

“- Phillips, AFO Chief Mechanic: Sir, if you get the wrong wire, you'll cut the engine feeds, and the plane will crash.
- President James Marshall: Then we don't want to get the wrong wire, do we?”
Brian Libby - Chief Mechanic
Harrison Ford - President James Marshall