“There are two kinds of people - Greeks, and everyone else who wish they were Greek.”
Michael Constantine - Gus Portokalos

You know, the root of the word Miller is a Greek word. Miller come from the Greek word "milo," which is mean "apple," so there you go. As many of you know, our name, Portokalos, is come from the Greek word "portokali," which mean "orange." So, okay? Here tonight, we have, ah, apple and orange. We all different, but in the end, we all fruit.
Michael Constantine - Gus Portokalos

“When you were riding around on your Indian and wiping your ass with the American flag, my father was in Vietnam. He fought there, and he died there too. So don't tell me I like you, because I hate your fucking guts, okay?”

Kiefer Sutherland - John Buckner

- Maria Portokalos: Toula, on my wedding night, my mother, she said to me, "Greek women, we may be lambs in the kitchen, but we are tigers in the bedroom."
- Toula Portokalos: Eww. Please let that be the end of your speech.
Lainie Kazan - Maria Portokalos
Nia Vardalos - Toula Portokalos

“When I was growing up, I knew I was different. The other girls were blonde and delicate, and I was a swarthy six-year-old with sideburns.”
Nia Vardalos - Toula Portokalos