“You treat a hot girl like dirt, and she'll stick to you like mud.”
Jason Segel - Sam Schechter

- Manny: So, you think she's the girl for me?
- Sid: Oh, yeah, she's tons of fun, and you're no fun at all. She "completes" you.
Ray Romano - Manny
John Leguizamo - Sid

“Let me tell you the first rule of politics: always know if the juice is worth the squeeze. You know what that means? It means you don't steal my girl unless you're ready to accept the consequences.”
Timothy Olyphant - Kelly

“- The Great Gonzo: Camila's my girlfriend!
- Turkey: You've gotta be kiddin'. You're not even a bird!
- The Great Gonzo: Well, nobody's perfect.”
Dave Goelz - The Great Gonzo
Steve Whitmire - Turkey

“- Jenny Curran: Have you ever been with a girl, Forrest?
- Forrest Gump: I sit next to them in my Home Economics class all the time.”
Robin Wright - Jenny Curran
Tom Hanks - Forrest Gump