“- J. Worthington Foulfellow: There is only one cure! A vacation! On Pleasure Island!
- Pinocchio: Pleasure Island?
- J. Worthington Foulfellow: Yes! That happy land of carefree boys where everyday's a holiday!”

Walter Catlett - J. Worthington Foulfellow
Dickie Jones - Pinocchio

“Old age. It's the only disease, Mr. Thompson, that you don't look forward to being cured of.”

Everett Sloane - Mr. Bernstein

“- Ronald Camp: I'm terribly sorry, Mr. Ace. I'll have the plumbing checked immediately.
- Ace Ventura: Be sure that you do! If I'd been drinking out of the toilet, I might've been killed!”
Udo Kerr - Ronald Camp
Jim Carrey - Ace Ventura

“I'm saying his sins will soon find him out. I'm saying his cup of iniquity is full. I'm saying Jesse James is a desperate case and may require a desperate remedy.”

James Carville - Governor Crittenden

“- Martin Brundle: You were there the night my father died; he was working on a cure.
- Stathis Borans: That's why you dragged yourself all the way out here? To find out about a cure?
- Martin Brundle: You're my only hope.”
Eric Stoltz - Martin Brundle
John Getz - Stathis Borans