“Retirement at 65 is ridiculous. When I was 65 I still had pimples.”
Old age quotes
298 old age quotes, film quotes, movie lines, taglines-
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“Old age is not so bad when you consider the alternatives.”
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“First you are young; then you are middle-aged; then you are old; then you are wonderful.”
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“- Dr. Lester: If I was 80 years younger, I'd box your ears.
- Craig Schwartz: I wasn't toying with her sir, I wouldn't - pardon me, how old are you, sir?
- Dr. Lester: 105. Carrot juice, lots of it. I swear, sometimes it's not worth it. I piss orange. I have to piss sitting down like a goddamn girlie-girl every fifteen minutes.”
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“At this age in my life I've finally decided to settle down.”
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“- Ossie: I don't want to grow up.
- Tito: Why?
- Ossie: I don't want to get old like O'Sheen.
- Tito: What?
- Ossie: I don't want to turn into dust.”
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“- Evelyn Adler: Midlife crisis, apparently.
- Frank Adler: He's 70.
- Evelyn Adler: I know. Must have been on time delay or something.”
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- Howard: Death came first. She met me in the dog park.
- Madeline: Oh, so Death is a "her"?
- Howard: Uh, yeah. It turns out Death is an elderly white woman.
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“Three things to remember when you get older: never pass up a bathroom, never waste a hard-on, and never trust a fart.”
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She told me on her deathbed: “you get back out there again”.
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“- Nick and Billy's Boss: You two were great salesmen. The best! But at the end of the day, you're grinders. Foot soldiers. We all know you'll never be generals. And I'm gonna say something harsh right now.
- Billy McMahon: Now you're gonna say something harsh?
- Nick and Billy's Boss: Strap it in, boys, 'cause it ain't pretty out there. And you...” (continue) (continue reading)
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“- Dean Kansky: British women do not age well. Eight years ago she was a luscious treat, you know, she probably looked like, you know, Baby Spice, now she could look like...
- Jonathan Trager: Old Spice.”
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“- Pierce: Charles Xavier, the world famous mutant octogenarian.
- Charles: Actually, I'm a nonagenarian.”
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“You seek resolutions because you are young. But you will understand this one day.”
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“It's Hasbro, not Milton Bradley that makes Yahtze now, Grandpa.”
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“- M. Gustave: She was dynamite in the sack, by the way.
- Zero: ...She was 84, Monsieur Gustave.
- M. Gustave: Mmm, I've had older. When you're young, it's all filet steak, but as the years go by, you have to move on to the cheap cuts. Which is fine with me, because I like those. More flavorful, or so they say.” -
“That's the problem with old men. You can kick 'em down the stairs, and say it's an accident, but you can't just shoot 'em.”
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“I had the chicken pox when Herbert Hoover was in the White House.”
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“- Johnny Chase: Iron Man 4! Downey's great don't get me wrong, I love Downey; he's just a little long in the tooth. I think you wanna go younger, man.
- Jon Favreau: If I recall, you're 5 years older than him.”
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“Get this: they've been getting pussy non-stop for 30 years. They're probably fucking right now and they're old dudes! They put makeup on and it's all good!”
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“I was downtown last week and saw a building as old as I am. It looked terrible.”
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“- Bruce Wayne: Still working? You're getting slow in your old age, Alfred.
- Alfred: It comes to us all, Master Wayne. Even you've got too old to die young, though not for lack of trying.”
Highlights
